i.
* Blood

I never knew you..
I still don't even know your name to be honest...
All I know is that you're the woman that gave birth to me- my Biological Mother
That's your name to me, and that's how its been my whole life.
Biological Mother.
Throughout my life I've been told I'm more like my father than you.
The soft eyes and his smile.
I never really understood why you did what you did, but according to everyone it was the best possible thing to happen to me.
To be put in an adoption center, waiting for my new family to come and take me out of the country.
For some reason though I still can't fathom what brought you to the decision to give me up, but none of the six children before me...
Is it because you wanted me to have a better life, or was it because you realized that you were incapable of raising another child that you had created?

ii
Second

I'm not even sure what to call you.
The technical term would be Adopted Mother, but you were hardly a mother to me in the six years that you knew me.
Blows to a child's face and body everyday is not something a Mother should be doing to their child.
Maybe it's because I wasn't your biological daughter, or maybe you just never knew how to love in general, either way you are not a mother to me.
For years, I always thought that the reason you used me as a punching bag was because I just wasn't good enough for you.
But then there was that one day that you did it to my best friend, and I realized that it wasn't really me, it was you.
It was you who was incapable of controlling yourself.
It was you who was incapable of being a good person.
Even after that day, I still lied and covered for you, even when Daddy asked me where I got the cuts and bruises from.
Despite him asking me how I had cut my lip and why my back was covered in scars, I still covered for you and lied my *** off.
And yet to this day, you ask me why I don't contact you and why I always make sure to never be alone with you in the same room.

iii
Caretaker**

That's what you are to me, maybe that's too harsh and I'm just a *****, but I am incapable of putting the label mother there.
You, out of all three were the closest thing to a mother for me.
You taught me how to be a lady when I needed to be, you guided me and pushed me more than anyone else.
You were the person that molded me into the person I am today out of all three of you.
I am thankful for that, because if it weren't for you, I would be unable to fight through the things that have been thrown my way.
But at the same time, I am unable to call you mother to this day.
Perhaps its the fact that I can still remember all the words of hatred that left your mouth that you said to me, or maybe its the fact that I still quite clearly remember all the things you did to me throughout the eleven years we've known each other, especially the last thing..
I forgive you though, in some ****** up way it was your way of showing your love for me I guess.
So there, that is the reason why you are the closest thing to a mother for me.
Forgive me Mama.