I wish I knew how I felt,
but I don't.

I'm getting more and more numb,
that's not good,
that's never good.

I don't want to get erratic
and paranoid.
I don't need to feel this broken.
It's not broken.
I'm not broken.

Why?

I can't understand.
Inside myself I'm at war,
a war I don't control.
I don't know what I'm fighting for,
I only know I'm battling against myself.

But why?

I can only ask that.
Maybe if I knew where to go and find myself,
all the pieces that I've never meet.
But I don't know where to start and I'm still.
And I don't care,
I really don't because if I did I would do something,
but I don't.

I sit here and I wait,
I wait for it to go away.
And another day is born, so I can pretend everything's alright,
night arrives and all demons come out to play.
It’s all my fault.

Why do I do this?

I do it to myself and it's real.
It's not in my head anymore,
it's everywhere.
Encrypted in disastrous hellos
and peaceful goodbyes.
They are everywhere.

One day I'll have to face it all,
I won't have anywhere to run, it will either
**** me or make me.