i am not pretty i am not beautiful i am not poetry i am not music i am not inspiration i am not good luck i am not strong i am not lucky i am not smart i am not a relationship i am never looking back i am mondays i am not fridays i am not red or blue or gray or black i am not a disaster i am not a tornado i am not a hurricane i have no eye in me i am not captivation i am procrastination i am a constant dark sky there is no light in me i am not honesty i am a bundle of never ending lies i am insomnia i am a biting insect called insecurity i am not a butterfly i am not a night owl i am more like a tree that never grows i am not sunshine i am not the moon i am not a star i am an asteroid i am a college workload i am an infinite amount of excuses and insults loving me will not be like falling into a cocoon of warmth it will be more like being tied to a rock in the middle of the ocean i am not a model type skinny i am instead a bag of twigs i am not a calm swim i am drowning i am your last shot of ***** that turns into 20 i am the penny stuck to the bottom of a jar i am lost money i am scalding hot chocolate i am times square i am letters i am gigantic words that you can't pronounce i am late night studying i am your favorite coffee shop that closes early i am not the girl that you will spend the rest of your life happily with i am the key to a motel door and a night you will regret i am the one night stand you wish you could stop thinking about i am auto correct that is never right i am the phone number you cannot forget i am reliable i like to think about running away but i never will spending your life with me will not be happy but it will also never be sad because i cannot stand to see people sad even though sometimes i am and i use big words and if you can't pronounce them then i'll teach you how to and i procrastinate all the time but i'll help you be organized and i'll wake you up early so that you can get to your favorite coffee shop and i'll warn you that the hot chocolate is scalding hot i'll cut you off after your last shot of ***** and i'll write you bad poetry that'll make you laugh to make up for it and we'll spend the entire night watching bad romance movies and cursing love so that you can try and forget that one night stand and because i never learned how to swim i always stick by the life guard so i'll save you if you drown and i am not perfect but i am also not broken; instead i am a never ending cycle of both regret and loneliness and so much more but i'll make sure that you'll never have to suffer any of that because i am your july thirty first thoughts, and you are mine
(h.l.)
don't ask me how this happened because i wasn't even planning on writing a poem. also the line "i am not a hurricane i have no eye in me" is from @hs_poetry on instagram