I am sorry for who I am.
I am sorry for getting jealous.
I am sorry for making you feel bad.
I am sorry for my tears.
I am sorry for my mood swings.
I am sorry for my insecurities.
I am sorry that you worry so much.
I am sorry that I  get scared.
I am sorry that I push you away.
I am sorry that I am weak.
I am sorry that I need you so much.
I am sorry that I let you fall in love with me.
But baby,you were so different.
You made me feel so so special.
For some reason I actually believed this could work. You and I.
It honestly was my biggest wish but I guess a sick person can't be with a healthy person.
I could never explain all of this and you probably won't understand and that is totally ok. I don't want you to see the world in my eyes. You see this world so differently, it makes you happy just to live. Maybe that's another reason why I fell in love with you. Maybe I hoped that I could also fall in love with living again,and I did for a while and I am so thankful for that. But this kind of sadness doesn't just go away and I should have known,I really wish I could have been the one to make you happy.
The one you could go on adventures with. The one you could marry some day. After all,I love you more than anything and I always will.
That sounds childish but it's true.
You showed me light in a time filled with darkness. I love you.