sometimes
my life feels like chaos
I can't feel my body
I can't hear my own thoughts
and I come back to myself in horror
because I've lost it all

life works slowly
everything feels like a puzzle
being put together
I'm beginning to feel more complete
I'm beginning to see myself clearer
seeing myself as a work of art
a human being
not a human doing

clarity comes to me
like a gust of wind
rushing through my hair

like being in the ocean
and swimming towards the sky
my lungs have hurt
from holding my breath for so long
but I see the light through the surface of the water
and you can bet your *** that when I reach the top
I'll take the grandest gasp of air
anyone has ever taken in
and it will be beautiful
I'll laugh like a child
I'll laugh beautiful exhaustion
I'll laugh because I will feel
I'll laugh because I will feel so alive
I'll laugh because I'm glad I am