sometimes things glow a little,
most often when I’m not looking
like little holes poked in my head,
little circles of sunlight shining in a dark place
you let me grasp at you because you are my reality
you hang me around your neck
and many days I would call myself a noose
but you still look at me like I grace your head
and your heart
and the space in between
I’m so heavy, I’m so much,
so much,
so much,
too much.
yet, you carry me.
you hold my cold hands
and kiss them like they don’t break you every night
I want to hold your head in both of my hands
kiss your forehead
your nose
your cheeks
your lips.
let me love your humanity gently.
I see where the outline of your heart is slightly off,
I see where something was erased
and redrawn just a little differently
I see where experience tinged the world for you
and sometimes I just want to take permanent marker
and write
I LOVE YOUR SWEETNESS, I LOVE YOUR IMPERFECTION
on your heart
so many times that
maybe
you start to think that love is a good thing,
that you are a good thing,
a blessing and a pleasure.
I will kiss your knuckles even when you turn them blue and purple.
I am not here to fade away.
I am so tired
and you feel like
the most beautiful, peaceful, permanence.