There are still these
small  painful moments,
that take me over in
very large ways.

And it's from missing you so deeply,
that nothing else can seem to matter...okay?

It isn't pretty, or nice to feel it,
or even admit it here and now.
But I talk to God and ask Him to heal it,
and He manages to defeat that feeling somehow.
So I sit and send you what He gives me,
hoping you feel it wherever you are.
Hoping a breeze brings Joy across your shoulders,
and spreads to warm your aching heart.

And maybe this pain disappears as we grow older.
Or maybe there really is a hole left inside me...
shaped like you.

I just hope that if someone
has to keep this awful feeling,
it will be me, instead of you.