The body is not an apology
I once sat on a bicycle, naked
with 3 medical students cheering at me
I don't believe I ever pedaled so hard
three strangers talking small talk while staring at my sweaty *****
And I was not even allowed to say anything back
but at least now I know I own a strong hard

The body is not an apology
I get uncomfortable just talking about nakedness
yet every week I make small talk with naked strangers
while fastly putting on my normal clothes
right over my sweaty body
I'm way too scared to take a shower like the rest of them

The body is not an apology
I didn't swim since I was fourteen
eleven years of excuses why I shouldn't swim, but honestly,
I just can't handle the image of myself in a bathing suit
I'm the fattest person I ever met
And I'm so tired
of trying to find apologies
for being what I am

The body is not an apology
and neither are eating disorder, depression or small budget
Neither is too tired to cook or genetics
my bones aren't any heavier than yours

The body is not an apology
But maybe my gym card is
and my food diary
and my salad for dinner
Maybe it is enough
that at least
today I tried