Ugh god I write such lame things down and I'm not sure why I keep doing it
I think I just like that you read it or I like the fact that I get to
And most times writing it down makes it settle in my brain so it doesn't whir around at lightning speed this late at night, preventing me from shutting my eyes
But I keep writing of you and you're still on my mind, that's not fair
I like to think about you making sure the blanket is on me or about the angle I see you from and how the light hits you there, sometimes it'll catch a few Rays in between each eyelash. Sometimes I accidentally think too quickly about the future and I get a bit scared wondering who I'll talk to if I can no longer constantly bug you (****)
But I look myself in the mirror and tell myself to chill, I've got time, and when time runs out, I'll figure it out
I'll handle it

It's 3am and I'm thinking about how I'll miss you a year from now
I wonder