It’s that month again where everything’s frozen. The earth, the air—it’s like time is broken. I tell myself I just have to make it through one more January. Then maybe I’ll be okay in the arms of February. March will soon pass, carrying with it the Spring. Perhaps the tears of April shall return my wings. May will twist its roots through the damp earth. Then June shall arrive and Summer will give birth to the heat of July and a sky, cloudless blue. I’ll be thinking of August, the month I first kissed you, and remembering those years we spent together. So long, yet so short, but somehow felt like forever. Again it will be September, the month of your accident. It was that same Fall, we found out I was pregnant. Through October, I’ll build nothing but dread. By the time November comes, I’ll be halfway dead. December is preparation not for a beginning, but an end. The cold Winters of January will return once again. That was the month I lost you and our baby. Time hasn’t healed me; every day feels like January. But I promised myself I would make it through. I must conquer each January. I must continue;
I am much unwell every January. I may not post for a while. For sure, something will be posted on the 19th.