1st Year
You took me by the hand
Gazed upon my eyes
"I love you", u said
You wrote me a poem
'Sunshine', remember?
You said your eyes reflected
My sunshine
But I also understood,
You didn't love me like I did
You loved the gift in me,
That I gave u joy, peace and happiness
I felt your heartbeat
I was there

                2nd Year
You took me by the hand
Gazed upon my eyes
And said you wanted to leave
"I love you", I said
You gave in to the eyes that once reflected your sunshine
But I also knew,
You stayed out of guilt
You still didn't love me like I did
I was in to the deep end
I wasn't giving u joy like I used to
We've been through too much
I'm not letting you go
No, that's not an option
Your seeds are embedded in my soul
You soothed the ****** that surfaced me
You are in every part of me
I am incomplete without you

             3rd Year
You took me by the hand
Gazed upon my eyes
And said u wanted to leave, again
"I love you", I said
But it wasn't enough, I knew this
You wrote me a poem
'Dear Balm', remember?
"Variants of species invade it's land but never conquer it's territory"
You gave me hope
But rapidly crushed it with
'From Burchelli'
You had already met her,
She was a mirror reflection of you
Poet in her own right
Crazy, free spirited just like you
You felt her heartbeat
She too, felt your heartbeat
You love her
She loves you
Still, you gave in to guilt

You took me by the hand, again
Gazed upon my eyes
And said, "This car is not traveling like it used to" without hesitation
And I knew I had lost you
All these years I've made you live a lie
You are leaving but you are staying
We've been through this road more times than you can remember, but I can
I know though you are with me,
You no longer belong to me
And until I find the strength to walk away from you
I'll still be here,
Calling you mine even when I know 'we' no longer exist

I have lied to my parents:
"I'm fine."
"It was wonderful!"
"I slept well last night."
"No...nothing's wrong."

I have lied to my friends:
"I'm not tired."
"I am happy."
"You did great."
"It was no problem."

I've lied to myself:
"I feel great!"
"I'm not sad."
"I can do this."
"It was awesome!"

No one ever guesses:
"Me too."
"Thank you!"
"Well I feel amazing!"
"That's great. Let me tell you..."

But people lie to me too:
"You look great!"
"It was no trouble at all."
"No, you didn't stammer."
"I'm telling you, nothing's wrong."

Don't we all lie?
To stay sane,
To stay happy,
To deal with people,
To make others happy...

Maybe not all lies are bad.
But maybe,
Maybe they are.
Maybe the lies hurt.
Maybe we are kidding ourselves.

What if no one lied?
Even to stay sane,
Even to stay happy,
Even to deal with people,
Even to make others happy...

Is the truth really that bad?
To say:
"That wasn't good."
"No. I don't like you."
"I'm having nightmares."

I will admit now:
It won't be easy.
People might get hurt.
Friends may start fighting.
People might stop being friends.

But people would say things like:
"I'm scared."
"I'm jealous."
"I really like you."
"You are a wonderful person."

So people might
Fall in love,
Make friends,
Get help they need,
Discover something new.

If you could not lie
Would it be so bad?
What would you say?
Who would you say it to?

A catfish laughs.
It thinks of other catfishes
In other ponds.