"what do you wanna do, Liana?"
My mom asks me
"Death"
I respond
"Do you want to eat something?"
"No, I just want to die"
"What are you thinking about?"
"My death"
She laughs
Smiles
She doesn't understand
She doesn't want to understand I'm not joking
When I'm telling her
"What do you want to do tomorrow?"
She asks
"I don't want a tomorrow. I want to die"
I answer
She giggles
"That's not an option" she chuckles
She doesn't know
I'm not going to act on it as of now, but I crave it sometimes, you know? I feel like she doesn't get that I'm serious.