Gut convulsions sputtering forth into mental explosions
emotional rebukes and back-tracking,
this feels so right but will be so wrong.
I can't take this leap but I must.
Perhaps in another life it could be
One plus you equals me,
alone with my jawbone tight
grinding molars enclosed in this room's twilight.
Alive and well, loving this emotion
simultaneously raising up and crashing down, what a commotion.
You wore my hat all night long,
made me care about myself, at least for the length of the song.
Now Im by myself, once again, while you're at home with him.
the committed relationship you're in, while we're just friends.
But I see the light in your eyes when we speak.
The uplift of your spirits when we face another feet to feet.
Are you happy and content within the life that you've built?
Or are you ready for something else, subtracting your guilt.
I love you more than you can probably comprehend,
****, the only time we spend together is as wage-slaves,
pacing like hamsters to no foreseeable end.
But every moment we laugh and dance about
makes me want to raise my arms high and shout
"I love this girl and everything she's about!"
But I fear it will never be…
because you're at home with him and not me….
It's been a long time since I've wrote anything. Perhaps this is the first time in awhile since I've felt much of anything.
Here's my heart and mind, spilt gently into a few words arranged across a couple lines.