Påłpëbŕå

Påłpëbŕå Aug 7

🚬

my blood leaking out of my veins
my thoughts flowing out of my brain
just one drag, one last hit
just one puff, one last sip
and i would never look back, never take it again
and this shall devour me whole because i can't take pain

i shall smoke until am no longer visible
i shall drink until ***** runs in my veins

#pathetic

Påłpëbŕå Aug 2

FIRSTS FIRST

why is it that the "first" everything mesmerizes me
is it the beginning of a story that sets my heart free?
the first electric zap felt on meeting someone's eyes
the connection built in an instant, a new desire thrives
the first step taken by a little baby on her own
or the excitement of listening to someone's voice over the phone
for the very first time, something blossoming anew
a seedling sprouting into a tree under the sky so blue
yes, the freshness of a new day's morning dew
and visiting a place for the first time for a beautiful view
all these things and more make my nerves explode
with a joy so surreal, something i always love to explore

the first time i speak to a stranger will be the last time he will be a stranger,
the sunrise of 1st January will always be a game changer,

the first child, the first day at school, the first time i hold someone's hand

or the first time someone touches beyond my body, ingraining himself on my skin like a brand

the introduction to a topic or the chapter number one in my books
the first heartbreak, the first financial decision i ever took?

all this and more, rattles me to my very core
because firsts don't last, the energy fades
one after another, more memories we make
until the movie ends and credits apear on the black background
.
.
.
-i love firsts since they do not last,
and maybe that's why there's such a fuss about our past?
i love firsts because they don't last
and that's why a part of us shall always stay in the past

Påłpëbŕå Jul 15

the idea of love

it's isn't about the looks,
but the characters built in books
for a tall handsome man in my head
looks better in my imagination instead
it ain't about the way he speaks
but the silence of anonymity makes me weak
for once when he'd start moving his lips
the illusion my mind conjured up would skip
it isn't about how he is in the videos he makes
its the stillness of the photograph that makes my heart shake
the mystery is attractive and reality is always a ******
the idea of my crush is pretty, looking good only in summer
but as the last piece of puzzle fits, its winter again
everything back to square one, back to being sane
for i crave a fallen angel with possessive arms and a heady glare
a ****** up moral compass and just one woman for whom he cares
a head full of thick dark hair and a skin not so fair
a manly stubble decorating his jaw and a mouth meant to be kissed
a presence so commanding that it is hard to be missed
an anti-hero through and through, darkness with a tinge of light
but i know fr, he will only ever exist if this is what i do, i write

first deserve then desire

Påłpëbŕå Jun 7

#burn

i don't know but these ******' feelings ****
me wanting to feel the warmth of your hand, a clusterfuck
because we aren't dating, just using each other thoroughly
with every chase and every lick, we shatter into a bliss so otherworldly
you came into my life when i was happy on my own
living the life of my dreams and texting tons of guys on my phone
but you had to make me obsessed with your eyes
the way they stared at me and looked through my soul- surprise?
the way your fingers mapped every corner of my skin
making me moan and crave your darkness like a sin
i was sprawled for all your attention and the things you wanted to do to me
but crushing my beating heart after starting it wasn't for you to see
making me vulnerable and learning my secrets only to keep your distance
wasn't on the menu, but sharing could've been, for instance-
when you dug deeper into my brain, twisted my veins and got answers
i too had the right to know what makes you tick and what happens after?
your favourite colour, your best day till date?
maybe just why are you so **** ******* yourself, your fate?
but no...you left me high and dry, with nothing, not even my thoughts belonging to me
and thought that this arrangement- would be enough, to be?
you stalked me, emptied me of all my confessions
got inside me and my head with the promise of passion
so you can't leave without giving me a part of your soul in return
because this is the cost we pay, if two play with fire, then both of us shall burn

🔥