I really want to go home and play in the snow with my high on acid boyfriend.

I don’t know what I need from you
for me to feel secure but I know I like when you smile at me.

My brain is so tricky
sometimes I feel like I don’t know her.
I was fine all day just resting after an all nighter,
until my boyfriend came home from work and wanted to lay down in bed.
I squeezed in beside him and suddenly couldn’t stop the tears that were soaking my pillow.
I sniffled quietly, not wanting him to know that I was randomly overcome with sadness,
and asked if he’d put his arm around me.
It wasn’t him or anyone or anything,
it’s just how depression is sometimes.

He’s mentioned before that I was a mess when we first met.
A fragile peach scone with a heart that was too heavy,
but luckily he is strong enough to help carry some of the weight.

I couldn’t see the stars through the ceiling of our apartment as we lay in a tent you set up in the living room.

But I could see them when I looked at you.