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  Nov 2024 Zach Kinnett
Matthew Harper
I don't know my place,
Where do I belong?
Just where is my space?
What takes it so long?

I feel like a piece not meant to be used,
A piece of a puzzle just so **** confused,
A piece of a puzzle that could never fit,
Or just like a fire that's never been lit,

I'm like a shard from different collection,
I'm just a someone who longs for connection,
What will it take to find my puzzle set?
What are the conditions that had not been met?

I wish there was someone to show me the way,
When will they show? I'm thinking all day,
Am I just a piece that one could just spare?
Why do they avoid me, do you think it's fair?

So am I unworthy of getting to know?
Is it just something that you cannot show?
Is it so much to ask to be known?
Just what do I need to not be alone?

I wish you'd just ask, if I want to go too,
Is that a hard task? Is that really true?
Sadly I think not, I think you're just blind,
You just don't want me to be what you find.
Why can't I fit in?
I pray, please do tell,
How can I fit in?
How to break this spell?
I've given up religion
After every church said
There's a special place
For people like me
Just for trying to
Make my pain
Go away
My father beat me up pretty badly for as long as I can remember... when I was fifteen I said no more and gave him a little of what he deserved - and got kicked out of his house for it. That same week my first girlfriend dumped me.
It was just too much for a teen to handle without proper help and it seemed like that despair would stay forever. So I went to 3 different drug stores and bought every pain killer I could get my hands into... and took them all at once. I was so lucky my system rejected them and made me throw up.
So that's why I cut the cord from church... isn't God love? Isn't God forgiveness? Or am I doomed almost from the start?
I like to think not... I like to think that's no more than an earthly claim.

— The End —