Submit your work, meet writers and drop the ads. Become a member
 
135 · Mar 2019
I wonder
carson Mar 2019
I lie awake at night wondering if you ever feel the same.
135 · Dec 2019
DNA
carson Dec 2019
DNA
Humans are just ****** forms of DNA who bash on each other for no purpose except to feel better about them selves.
134 · Aug 2019
...
carson Aug 2019
...
I hate you when you love me.
130 · Jun 2020
I really suck at love poems
carson Jun 2020
and here we are again.
in school i was told never to begin a sentence with and, but, maybe, however, because.
but here we are again
doing the the things we shouldn't.
maybe if we were older we would be wiser
like our parents or teachers, role models of every kind of failed relationship there is.
however i find hope in every bit of our disaster
you say we are two trains headed for a head on collision, but i dont care.
because i like the way you taste when we burn into flames
the teachers may have been right, but you break all my rules time and time again.
129 · Feb 2020
sorry, you
carson Feb 2020
all i can say is sorry.  
sorry that i was your punching bag who fought back.
128 · Apr 2019
Untitled
carson Apr 2019
Why am I holding on to something that I should let go,
I tell myself that ill be okay.
Why should I hurt myself and put you on a pedestal, I fall and make the same mistakes.
127 · Nov 2019
im sorry...
carson Nov 2019
The worst part, however, is not that you're a disappointment.
It's the permanent, never ending embarrassment
Of always failing and coming last
126 · Apr 2019
4 a.m.
carson Apr 2019
4 AM in my room and I'm high again
Always treading cautious society's a lions den
Feelin' pain I'm just wishin that the **** would end
No one listens so I'm crying on the internet
Won't lie I dont know where I should go
Got walls and a roof but this house ain’t home
Rollin’ up dope I've been outta my zone
I’m drownin' in issues I'm outta control
Tell the reaper to take my life with a scythe quick
Why is pain the only thing my brain can siphon
I've been on a journey tryna find some enlightenment
Why is death the only concept that gets me excited
Should I stay or go that’s been on my mind
Feel like you'll get bored of me I'll be a waste of time
And thoughts of you leavin' been keepin me up at night
So tell me that we're fine
And that we'll be alright
126 · May 2019
heartache and heartbreak
carson May 2019
This ink, it runs.
This paper is stained
Tears run free as
I'm stuck in a daze.
I put this pen to paper,
To write the words
This voice can't deliver.
My heart is heavy
With pain and despair.
Can't breathe.
I'm fighting for air.
My mind is spinning
At the speed of light.
This pain in my life
Has clouded my mind.
The thoughts are deafening
Of my life, you took away,
But after all my
Heartache,
Someday I'll be okay
126 · Nov 2019
this is toxic love, dear<3
carson Nov 2019
Crushed like ice
Like twenty tons have been thrown on my soul
You spoke those words that emitted through your vocal cords like venom
A snake you were
Looking through my eyes into my core
So delicately
You devised your plan to **** everything inside me
Skillfully you weaved your web, planted your trap
And with your love decoy blindfolded my logic
All that was open was my trust
Your weapon
You deceived, I believed
Your arms were so warm,
Now the only warmth I feel
Is that of my blood
Spilling from my soul
As my life swings carelessly
Like a pendulum
Back and forth
Higher and higher
But going nowhere
The five senses have gone numb
I scream louder and louder
But no one hears me
They speak, they call out to help
I cannot hear
Look at me, look at the nothingness you have brought onto me
shout out to my ex<3
123 · Jan 2020
Untitled
carson Jan 2020
I have razor blade sheets
for you to tuck me into
while the guilt you caused ate away at the love we had.
123 · Feb 2019
sinking
carson Feb 2019
Why am I holding onto something that I should let go?
I tell myself that I'll be okay.
Why should I hurt myself and put you on a pedestal?
I fall and make the same mistake.
118 · May 2019
Show me
carson May 2019
Actions speak louder than words ever will, so show me you love me. Or can you?
118 · Sep 2019
red flags
carson Sep 2019
when you look at all my red flags through rose colored glasses all you see are flags.
115 · Nov 2019
Untitled
carson Nov 2019
Why would you give someone a sliver of hope and throw it down there throat.
You had a diamond and threw it, you threw it far away, and you picked up a rock.  
You.  you are the reason my ink bleeds through paper.  You are the reason my head aches.
But.  in the end its me who did it.
115 · Sep 2019
Untitled
carson Sep 2019
It’s not about being happy, that is the thing. I’m just trying to get through each day. I can’t keep asking myself ‘Am I happy? ‘ It just makes me more miserable. I don’t know If I believe in it, real lasting happiness, All those perky, well-adjusted people you see in movies and TV shows ? I don’t think they exist.
carson Aug 2019
Hey dad, have you ever wondered how your son was after 15 years?
Hey dad, was it worth going to prison to avoid seeing me?
Hey dad, I still owe you my name.
Hey dad, I blame myself for you leaving.
Hey dad, did you ever love me or have a second thought?
I have never met my biological father:(
109 · Apr 2019
perfection is useless
carson Apr 2019
Rocks

Rocks and people are both alike
Igneous rocks are for people that are full of anger
Metamorphic rocks are for people that have different social faces
Sedimentary rocks are for people that are friends with anyone
Every rock was made the same way though,
Every rock is unique.
There is no such thing as a perfect rock. Perfect is a 10 letter word that doesn't exist, for example, trees.
Trees and rock are similar if you look at it a certain way.
Some trees lean this way or that and some have missing bark or just have a little bit to much moss.  Some rocks have holes or there a little to big, but despite the way they look humans find them beautiful in one way or another.
109 · Jan 2020
Cursed
carson Jan 2020
i
have
been
cursed
with
the
inability
to
love
108 · Sep 2019
Untitled
carson Sep 2019
Not understanding that you’re a horrible person doesn’t make you less of a horrible person
108 · Aug 2019
Untitled
carson Aug 2019
You are the waves in my heart, I just dont know what you will wash up on shore.
104 · Nov 2019
Sincerely to you<3
carson Nov 2019
You ever wake up with your footie PJs warming

your neck like a noose? Ever upchuck

after a home-cooked meal? Or notice

how the blood on the bottoms of your feet

just won’t seem to go away? Love, it used to be

you could retire your toothbrush for like two or three days and still

I’d push my downy face into your neck. Used to be

I hung on your every word. Used to be. But now

I can tell you your breath stinks and you’re full of ****.

You have more lies about yourself than bodies

beneath your bed…
our relationship was toxic.  i gave you so many chances
103 · Feb 2020
i couldn't love her.
carson Feb 2020
When she puts her arms around you,
she will make you feel safe,
but rarely will she take you in her arms.
she will call you late at night
when the radio is playing her favorite song
and tell you how much it reminds her of you.
But these are the same songs
that she has dedicated to those before you.
Listen to her when she is crying
its one of the only times
she will tell you the truth.
she will pretend to understand you, and you'll believe her
when she says she loves all your flaws.
she will tell you she wants all
the same things you do, but she doesn't.
she doesn't know what she wants.
she will tell you
that you are the only thing she needs, but you aren't.
she will want others.
she will believe she is always right
even when she's not and you know she's not,
but you'll stop arguing anyway.
you'll stay because her selfishness and her recklessness
don't seem less than ordinary.
Everyone around you will constantly say how beautiful she is,
a work of art, someone extraordinary.
Until the day she shows the true colors underneath her mask.
They will be dark and dangerous and in your hesitation,
you might survive.
You might just dodge a bullet.
For the person who loves her next,
Because i couldn't.
103 · Apr 2019
Untitled
carson Apr 2019
Clouds of thunder, pouring rain,
The hurt I feel, the throbbing pain.
Droplets trickling down my face.
should rain give me this one embrace?

Drenched and cold, my biggest fears,
Not by the rain but by my tears.
When will this storm come to an end?
102 · Mar 2020
my mask.
carson Mar 2020
My therapist asked,
"How do you prepare for your day?"
I simply replied
"i count my lies and find my mask."
carson Oct 2019
Some things, they just don't last
You can't get a prescription for that
Quit shoving these sugar pills down my throat
Cause I'm starting to choke
100 · Sep 2019
all because of you
carson Sep 2019
Angry
Mad
Livid
Furious
******
At you

Sad
Depressed
Heartbroken
Morose
Melancholy
Because of you

Unbreakable
Strong
Resilient
Flexible
Tough
In spite of you
99 · Mar 2020
Untitled
carson Mar 2020
I don’t understand how people… live. It’s amazing to me that people wake up every morning and say: ‘Yeah, another day, let’s do it.’ How do people do it? I don’t know how.
99 · Apr 2019
Untitled
carson Apr 2019
I get worried over the guys you text and you say "they are just friends"
but remember I was your friend too.
99 · Jan 2020
T...
carson Jan 2020
Sorry for all the bad things I did, I was too immature for what we had, I really learned how to be a better person with time and learned from all my mistakes, but it is too late now. It is sad how I miss you so much but to you I'm probably just a lot of bad memories, I hope one day our paths cross again, even if just as friends, I would **** just to have a laugh with you again.
98 · Mar 2020
Untitled
carson Mar 2020
The sky cry’s
A scream of frantic worship
You pant the bitter wind
As rain and sea rip into me
Smearing blood over the rocks
I let the storm crush me.
95 · Feb 2020
Untitled
carson Feb 2020
jealousy is a stupid word.
What it should mean is that i know how easy it is to fall in love with you, thats why i'm scared.
95 · Jan 2020
Untitled
carson Jan 2020
You didn’t want “just friends”
So now we’re nothing
I was scared to leave her
Not like that
You pushed and I fell
Into bed with you
But what did that give us?
Razor blade sheets for you to tuck me into
The guilt ate away at the love I had for you
I needed time
94 · Jan 2020
</3
carson Jan 2020
</3
Everything
I do
Is
Always
Wrong
In your
Eyes
94 · Nov 2019
Untitled
carson Nov 2019
You know I can't go on with any regret.
Our relationship is hard like a game of roulette
We're off and on so constantly
And you cheating... come on, honestly.

This is a hard thing to say but needs to be said.
I can't go on being with you... sometimes I'd rather be dead.
You treat me so bad and make me cry.
Don't worry anymore, no need to lie.

You have hurt me a lot and I want you to know
I will never love you again, so let me go.
I've made up my mind, I've made my choice.
I soon will be happy and able to rejoice.

It's over now; you should think long and hard.
Maybe next time you won't cheat.
I loved you so much and you acted like normal.
You even got yourself a date to the Valentine's Formal.

I treated you no less than my queen.
You went behind my back.
You lost my trust you broke my heart.
Now I need to reboot and maybe restart.
93 · Jan 2020
Untitled
carson Jan 2020
Burn my soul.
You need to stay warm, right?
93 · Jan 2020
overwhelmed
carson Jan 2020
overwhelming and revealing
this amazing feeling,
this ache i crave, this desire,
this emotion you inspire.

Beautiful, unexpected, never to part,
a collision between two hearts,
passionate and pure.
this is love for sure.
-love, carson.
92 · Feb 2020
Untitled
carson Feb 2020
i cant write a good poem no matter how hard i try.
all of them are my previous heartbreaks or my future heartbreaks.
help me please.
91 · Feb 2020
Untitled
carson Feb 2020
In our rib cage lies our heart
Protected
But people can reach inside and cause chaos.
When this happens
Remind yourself that you are not a burden.
88 · Feb 2020
The sky
carson Feb 2020
"Even the sky reminds me of you"
Of course it does, its the same sky we stood under.
85 · Jan 2020
Untitled
carson Jan 2020
If those are your friends, you are really lonely
83 · Feb 2020
Untitled
carson Feb 2020
I wish everything was like it used to be.
Those simple days when we walked hand in hand.
I wish we could go back to the days where your head would fit perfectly in my neck.
The days where we would just lay and do nothing.
Where we could cuddle and stay warm.
The days where we loved each other with our whole hearts.
The days where just seeing you smile was all I needed to be happy.
I wish I could just be with you again and see that gorgeous smile.

— The End —