So, dope  young fellow
With your pretty boy swag.
With your SnapBack on.
Pants so **** low.
Every girl just waiting in line just to give you a blow.
You're royalty around here, but this is still high school.
Taking every girls cherries and jewels.
You think that you're raising the bar but I've seen this before:
Call it VCR.

And then there's me:
Who don't get no ladies.
Because I'm the type of person who actually treats females as actually human beings.
Not toys.
I'll put them before myself.
I care about their joy.
You know what's dead: chivalry.
And it can never be reborn.
Not like Call of Duty: zombies.
Boom, headshot.
But there's another ten coming your way.
Then it gets to the point when you're just blown away.
But I'll be your player 2.
Girl, I'd give up all my perks just for you.

So you guys out there with the pretty boy swag.
Who just zip it all up cuz they think they got  it in the bag.
I'm going to fight.
I'm going to step up for the voices not heard.
Cuz you've drowned them in depression, you've choke them with cruelty, and you've slapped them with sadness.
Unable to act.
Like a flightless bird.
I'll let them out of their cages so they can fly once again.
So you can't weight them down:
Call you Anchormen. Ooo, **** em'

So, pretty boy, nothing close to fantastic.
I just wanna say:
That I know  I'm swagtastic.
S- saving
W- women
A- against
G- guys
T- that
A- abuse
S- sensitive
T- tender
I- innocent
C- companions.

Shorten that: swag.
S- she
W- wants
A- a
G- gentlemen.

So now boy,
Lets just see which one of us got that "Pretty Boy Swag"

Dream world in an alternate ground reality
where the black trees are shadows
lurking and waiting to consume the firefly
light illuminating my blood
like radioactive sludge pulsing
loving breathing
I want the transcendent mauve sky
to drown me until I am nothing more
than the ideals of humanity
murmuring of the metal birds
and mammals
humming harmoniously with the
beat of my ears
I am not awake
I have been here before
somewhere in a past life
I can feel it rattling in my bones
another radio frequency is found
tomorrow will not come because
everything is here and now
this moment expands as far as the eye can see
and then some
firewood burning inside my eyes
charring my iris
until the blue turns to orange
and the icy barren air fills my lungs
I am a wasteland

I'm cold.
And I'm tired.
And I'm so done.
Of being the only one.
Trying.

I'm alone.
And unprepared.
And so over being dragged along.
Of being the one that must be strong.
I'm weak.

Why?
Why is it me?
Why do I do for you,
But not me, too.

And you let me,
You let me **** myself.
You let me go through trials,
Guess you haven't cared for a while.

You say:
"I shouldn't put,
you through my pains"
But I guess it's all the same.
To you.

I do remember,
A beautiful time.
When I was yous,
And you were mine.

But it's not that simple.
It's not easy.
Because you're killing me.
So slowly.

they told me what didn't **** me only made me stronger,
what they didn't tell me was that the burden of what could have killed me, should have killed me, was going to carry on for the rest of my life.
every waking day i see myself, and its just a constant reminder of all the things i've been through,
the days, the moments of pure happiness that i wish to react,
or the moments where i feel the need to die, the shame, the embarrassment of still having the capacity to breath, the ability to walk around carrying what isn't more than just cells and organs.
i am still alive because of what didn't **** me,
but is it for the better that i am stronger?
or is it just an excuse, a reasoning to the ones who've had more achievements in theirs lives.
maybe the journey to which i'm taking is a long and agonizing 'achievement'
but is it making me stronger?
am i honestly, truly going to be a better person just because I've lived and gone through moments where other haven't
maybe the time has yet to come for me to be 'stronger'
maybe i'm not realizing or seeing that this,
me right now,
was a stronger me than i was before,
but how is no one realizing that what doesn't **** you only haunts you for the rest of your life?
maybe we all choose to ignore that fact and instead give it a better name than what it already has
we've all been to different trails
we're all going on different ones now,
and the choices,
decisions,
and moments we see,
will continue to be with us for as long as we're going to exist.
for what i know now is that,
what doesn't **** me hasn't made me stronger,
its made me realize that its what im going to have to live with whether its
pain or joy,
tears or fear,
laughter or lust.
until it kills me,
it carries me with all my burdens and regrets
just as i carry my moments of love and joy

Sometimes I wanna die
**** myself
Be done with this life
Say goodbye to the world
Get away from stupid reality

On the edge ofa cliff
Grasping onto my last
Shred of sanity
Deciding whether to jump

Not sure what is right
Should I stay or
Is it really better for
Everyone if I just let go

I want to take the plunge
But I'm not ready  to
Push myself over the edge

I wish you'd all let me go
Be free of all this pain
Because everywhere I turn
I'm the reason someone else is hurting

I want pain, to hurt
Bring the blade upon my
Fresh weak skin

I wish you'd let me go
Get rid of those soft
Fragile strings to a
Broken human being

Takes a gun out
Aimed at my head
Tries to shoot myself
Kills the world instead

Counting calories, telling lies
She'll keep this up until she dies.
Empty eyes, empty stomach, empty heart, empty mind;
What I've become is enough to drive myself mad
Empty, empty, empty. I'm nothing but sad.
So here it is girls, the rumors were true
I try so hard to be as skinny as you.
A monster, A *******, empty, empty girl;
I'm killing myself with my poor mental health.
Starving for beauty, beauty is pain
My head hurts so bad, I'm going insane.
Clutching my ribs, my thighs caving in
They were right--
Anorexia wins.