I hate myself.
But clearly not enough to fix me.
I continue to hate myself everyday,
the hate grows bigger.

It's not a hate that you can hide either,
people know that I don't love myself.
My hate attacks my body
my mind
my relationships
My heart.

I'm morbidly obese with hatred
I'm dying,  but
I hate myself too much to care.

The ice kept getting thinner
Collapsing underneath
Till there was nowhere else to go
For you and me.
The snow was left
Dying to freeze,
But Winter bowed out bravely
Fighting
Bitter
Cold
When Time came
I looked at you
'On the other side of winter'
You said.
'Is the endless Summer
I will share with you'.
I saw it all
As Summer
Melted the Winter in my heart.
And we said goodbye to what was left
The snow, The Winter
With Hope.

Colours painting skies
My eyes are weak with sorrow
Dreams washing away.
New hope in the air
The promise of tomorrow
Eyes closed in soft prayer.

I wont tell you how I feel. Inside
where the roses see no light.
I know it will make you sad.
I'll keep it to myself, hide it among the thorns,
twisting vines making me sick and tired.
Dry and baron soil unquenchable,
the gardener grieves for the seasons last harvest.
The tear buds are shaking from wooden stems
Drops of rose blood trying to quench the thirst.
A sacrificial death, my own cross yet to bare
Wild blood seeps until all the hurt is gone
Bled from each bloom,
soaking the roots, too late.
It is time to say goodbye
Each rose must be pruned
Hearts left rotting on the ground
Fertilizing a new day's harvest
They will never be the same
no rose as sweet as the one before
yet promise lingers with Spring's fresh hope
That A tiny bud can bring life from death.

I would have been your girl
If you had simply called me a gift.
I remember every word
Everything you said:
'The latest of my mistakes,
Great for keeping me warm'.

You were a domineering bard
With lyrical power
My young mind tricked by your words
crushing me down

But now I see that your words
Were always lies.
You played me like a word game
Your truth hurt

But it hurt more to know
you lied.
So I waited, with satisfaction
That you would run out of words.

The first moment I saw you
I fell
The second time
I fell
Deeper
Deeper
Deeper
Just by looking at you.
You were beautful,
your hair,
your eyes,
your tiny hands
I fell
Just by looking at you.


I saw you,
My whole world stopped.
Nothing existed,
but
Me and you.
Just me looking at you.
Nothing else,
No sounds
No cares,
No time
No place
Just me looking at you.