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nesrine ben May 2014
It seems like you found your own ways
It seems like you live a happy days
In a completely different place
while I stand here
remembering every little thing we had it together
It's so clear to me now
even you loved,
even you cared,
even you said,
even you did,
even you showed,  
but it wasn't enough,
it wasn't enough  to me
  Apr 2014 nesrine ben
Jason Cirkovic
My mother should be an author
She carves her soul into millions of pieces
Leaving it behind all of the family photos
When I see my mother
I see a woman
Who wants to hide her soul in a needle
Just so the screaming can stop in her mind,
These bottles are rattling in the living room
You see they have put shackles on her heart,
She can't love anymore
Without having ***** in her water bottle.

Where is she hiding her beer?
I feel like my mother is giving me a scavenger hunt
From the shards of glass that were left on the baseball fields
My mother used to take me to.

You know she always wasn't like this
She was strong minded and had a big heart
Tonight I will tell you the story of a woman
Who lost her soul to the Keystones to the Miller Lites
To the ****** Mary’s.
Let's rewind time
See ******* the soul in ten years

10- I look into my mother's eyes and I start to cry
Because I'm looking at a woman who I don't know anymore

9- I refused to bail her out of jail again
Because I'm afraid her kidney will fail if she drinks again

8- My mother staggered into the theater and disrupted the whole play,
My cast mates turned to me and asked, isn't that your mother?

7- I had to hold my mothers hand
Because she was throwing up the cocktail of drugs and alcohol

6- Daddy had to get mom out of jail she was drinking again

5- My mother throws the bottle across the room
And told me the reason why she drinks is because I'm Autistic

4- My mother overslept for my piano recital,
I didn't think it was a big deal
But I remember she spent the whole night crying
With a wine glass in her hand.

3- Mommy I didn't know your prescription came in a needle

2- Mommy the prescription say 2 pills a day
why are you taking 6?

1- My mother went to the doctor
Found out that she has Rheumatoid Arthritis
I don't know what that means,
But I know she will still be strong right?

0- She took me to a Dodger game for my birthday.
I remember Sammy Sosa hitting a home run that game
She told me that the only person that can **** your soul is yourself
nesrine ben Apr 2014
now and then I wish if I'm dead
now and then I wish if I'm not even born
now and then I wish if can leave
now and then I wish if I can stop everything and change it
now and then I wish if I'm alone
but after all this I have to thank God for this gift that I'm alive
all I can do is to pray and ask God to make my life better
because I'm sad , I'm misunderstood , I'm ignored , I'm confused
I'm not living I'm just surviving !
nesrine ben Apr 2014
we're born !
then we die !
so what is the point in all the suffering in between
I can't understand the goal of life
I'm to young to cry all that much
All I wished is to have a simple happy life
I'm so tired of suffering from everything
I'm miserable
nesrine ben Apr 2014
sometimes in this life love is built on a dream
sometimes in this life love is built on a sweet word
sometimes in this life love is built on a hope
sometimes in this life love is built on a smile
sometimes in this life love is easy to make it
but in my life love comes so slowly and it goes so fast !
nesrine ben Dec 2013
I give my best to make them satisfied
I do what ever it takes just to see them smile
I never say no if they ask me to do a favor
I never turn my bach to them
Is it the truth ; can you tell me if I'm a good friend?!
But I never found a friend beside me in my need
They turn all against me !!
what  I did to them ?!
Is it the truth ; they want me just for their egos ?!
am I good just for their needs?!
I guess yes ; it's the truth ; there's no good friend in my life except the Only ONE  . My best friend
He's not like the rest in my life
He always try to make me smile ; and I do the same ..
nothing can change this relation which last forever ... (I hope)
Its the truth .. There's a best friends in life..
Its time to change this life I live
All I need is my BEST FRIEND
True ; honest ; funny ... is my best friend.
Yes it's the truth .. I don't need others want just when they need something .... who wants them
they don"t last forever
yes it's the truth .. I only want to live beside my Best Friend ... and I'll stay beside him .. I'll do What ever it takes .. for him <3
nesrine ben Dec 2013
I have a lot of secret dreams ...
I have a lot of secret wishes ...
in every month I hope some of my dreams comes true
But I still wait...
I really want to realize my dream in DECEMBER .... I hope
Last month was full of bad and good memories
Last month was full of crazy moments I'll never forget
Last month ..... I can't describe it
But Please DECEMBER be good .. Be better
Maybe I'll change my life in this month .. who knows?!
From my heart ... I wish that December will be good for me and for everyone .
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