so much that separates us
from beginning to end
We woke in the morning
several hours apart
There was no kiss
Good Morning
no day to start

Voices over the phone
pretend they hold hands
only hanging up your voice
could my breath expand

Dinner over the table
is an empty treat
clashing gazes meet
Laying down,
so close to you
beneath the sheets
we are separated
by inches,
and close the gap
for heat

Days are lived by ourselves
Nights we become someone else

As I lay me down to sleep
I hope you wake
and my soul you claim
with lips that ask
my heart to keep

Nothing comes between us
beneath the sheets

You will never know,
The pain you left me in,
I thought I was over you...
But I'm not.
It still eats away at me,
From the inside out.
It's like I'm rotting away,
And it's getting worse and worse.

One million me memories and,
One million tears.
Cause by you,
And you alone.
Make no mistake,
You did what I thought impossible.

You broke my heart.

I always wonder why it still hurts.
Even after all these years,
You still manage to make,
One million memories,
And one million tears.

I wish you could know,
How much you hurt me.
How you ruined me,
How you stifled my trust...

I'm beginning to think,
The wound you left,
Will never heal,
And the pain is unbearable.

But don't worry,
I don't resent you,
Nor do I regret our friendship,
Because they are part of my one million memories.

All I hate,
Is that they come,
With one million tears.

I kissed the boy,
with the sunny smile,
and the ocean eyes.
and when he kissed me back
I could taste pity on his lips.

And when he held my hand,
and made fun of me,
because I held it wrong,
I knew you were never mine to keep,
no matter how much I wanted too.

we once saw a movie at midnight,
caressed my hand through the whole thing
and afterwards,
when you got shaky and anxious
I packed you a bowl,
and sat with you while you smoked it.
Fell asleep in your arms,
happy and warm.

you woke me up,
with sleepy kisses
and we skipped school,
and you made me breakfast
and we went on a hike,
ventured off the trail,
and I slid on some rocks
and ripped my favorite pants,
you laughed and kissed me,
and promised you would sew them.
for a moment I thought everything would work out

but you are a complicated person,
and I wish I had known the extent of that,
before we made love,
because you never had much love to give back,
and you took a lot from me,
at a point when I had very little to keep for myself,
I guess it was all just bad timing.

But I'm good now,
and you are....
good?
And I can pretend like we never touched,
and you can pretend like we never kissed,
and that's fine
because everything is good now.

I compare myself to silverware
because both myself
and your shining collection of forks and knives
let people use us over
and over again,
never asking for anything in return.
Though sometimes I wonder
if the tablespoon ever tires
of the same old routine
because I think that,
possibly,
I do.

I waited for you and
I still am waiting.
The difference from then
To now is that
I have hope
In us.