If I had a spare heart
that would beat just the same,
If I had a spare heart
to replace one in pain,
If I had a spare heart
to make everything okay,
If I had a spare heart,
I could love you.

If I had a spare heart
after you'd destroyed mine,
If I had a spare heart,
I could place it inside.
If I had a spare heart
that could erase the pain,
If I had a spare heart,
I could love you.

But the one heart I have
is too fragile to break,
and, with none to replace it,
I won't make that mistake.
If I had a spare heart,
then I'd have one to lose,
But I don't,
so I cannot love you.

You are
delicious
And I am
greedy.
You are
generous
And I am
needy.
You are
experienced
And I am
learning.
You are
flammable
And I am
burning.

Before I was ghost,
I was real.

Your hands
brought pink to my skin,
coaxed sighs
billowed softly,

heart surge,
pulse and shiver,
rise, fall

and, later, laughter;
chimed rhyme on my ribs.

Now I am resigned to sad places—
dark balconies,
orchards brimming with moon
and lightless bedrooms,

clinging fast to strangers
begging
*make me real
make me real.

it’s all i can do to keep my distance
when your words, in echoed time and harmony with my own,
send shockwaves to the center of my heart
cutting to the core of me in a delicious melting way

because i can’t breathe when you look at me
when our eyes arc electric, and the fire in your stare
robs me of my senses
and beckons me closer one shy smile at a time

my tongue refuses to be stilled
when it longs to regale you with resounding refrains
of how achingly beautiful you are
and how your smile makes my pulse rush in my veins

so i won’t stop listening to the spaces in between your speaking
looking to find in unspoken concert,
reflected wonder at the warp and weft of my woven words
and the silent serenade, that we -in love- are meant to be

i've got a fixation for your eyes,
       your eloquent form controls my mind,
       if you don't care, i'd like to stay awhile,
       hours are cheap, so how about the night?
i'm allured by your laughs at my feeble tries,
      when you repeal my determination,
       i will remind my adoration isn't in short supply,
       where did we land on the night?
i'm an addict when it comes to being a part of your life.

Love made, pillow fight;
you draw moons on my eyelids
and kiss them goodnight.

i know this heartache is self inflicted.
this ache in my chest would not exist
if i did not feed it fairy tales of forever in your eyes.  
but your words are like fire in my veins
and lightning through my heart
when you speak of love
i may go mad when you speak of love!
when i am left, as ever before,
in a place of wanting and waiting,
longing for the searing sting
of a flame that is not mine  
and never was meant to be
but it is the only time that i truly feel awake and alive
because i burn for you like a beacon in the night
holding my torch aloft
ever heedless of your unseeing eyes