I don't know
And that scares me
I had a plan
I knew
Who I was
What I was doing
Where I was going
But that's gone now
I'm stumbling through
Barely staying alive
Feeling like
I'll never make it
Everything pulls me down
I'm fighting just to crawl
But I don't know
Where I'm going
Who I am
What I'm doing
Why I'm here
I'm struggling
To understand
And all that does
Is confuse me more
I just don't know anymore
I'm lost

It's been so long
But I did it again
There are little red lines
Hiding on my body
I was clean so long
But I've broken again
My skin no longer solid
Broken in places unseen
I feel the burn
And I love it
Help me please
I can't stop crying
I swear I didn't mean to
But I did it again

Maybe I'd have a friend
To comfort me as I cry
Exhausted from life
Maybe they'd stop me
From beating myself numb
Telling me they're there
Maybe they'd love me
Through thick and thin
Because I've opened up to them
But then again
Maybe they'd laugh
Overjoyed by my misery
Enjoying my pain
Maybe they'd taunt
Telling me things I know
That others say they don't see
Maybe I'd end it all
So they could rejoice
I'm finally out of their way

How sweet
The relief
Of death
Sounds to me
I'd give anything
To end it all
To feel nothing
No worries
No problems
No fears
Just me
Finally free

Crying
Because I can't open apple juice
Thinking
About every flaw I have
Dwelling
On all the things wrong in my life
Drowning
In the tears of the past
Suffocating
On the air I try to breathe in
Dying
Because it's all killing me

I hear you
Crying out
I feel your pain
You miss him
Like I miss her
We mourn together
In the night
Weeping our losses
*I feel you

I'll give you this piece of me
Though there's not much to give
Do with it what you will
But here it is

I lost my mother
Just this past April
She wasn't there for graduation
She won't be there
If I get married
Or have little babies
And it breaks my heart
I know I've still got my father
But it's not the same
We're too different
He doesn't understand
There's no comfort
When I get bad
Nothing but anger
I need her
And she's not here
I've spent hours just crying
And because of an accident
Her car is gone too
It could have been mine
And now it's gone
I gave up my dream
Of going to school
Majoring in photography
(Something she helped me discover)
Making her proud
To buy a new car
So I could still work
I've got no more dreams
Nothing to look forward to
And I feel hopeless
After my car is paid off
In about two years
I may just end it
There's nothing left for me
Not in this life