Im from oak trees
Reaching limbs that shade
The sizzling concrete
Tailgating before a game

Im from Sunday breakfast
Family gathered round
Loud music & conversation
Filling the house with sound

I'm from a sprinkler
Placed in the backyard
In the summer time
The cheapest way to cool off

I'm from biting tongues
Southern by a grace
Taught feelings are better bottled up
In attempt to save a little face

I'm from photographs, artifacts and names used
In vain to help my grandmothers memory pull through

I'm from the place
Where music is constantly played
At every occasion, no matter the time of day

I'm from a culture, deeply rooted
Through mardi gras, beignets, and family reunions
Where English occasionally gives way to French
Like a tree. I branch
In every direction
I am from home

Chicken fried rice is
the date rate drug of the future,
it’s cheap & everyone likes it.

If anything, the government
could put mood altering drugs in it
to control the general population.

They could run a mass
free buffet campaign,
and by the end of dinner,
control the planet.

2012
the boy was like sun rays falling from a blue sky. his hair was shining blonde and flew in the wind, his eyes were the perfect blue, azure like a pure sky, tranquil like a warm sea. he was bones and skin, but knew not the weight of sin. he was on a quest for ataraxia, he was selfless, he was kind. he had wings and a halo shining above his blonde head, he was my guardian angel for a year and 2 months. he was the ambulance, he was the desire. he was the first. when the "hospital" prison gates came clamoring shut on my face, he ran far, far away. he found another shining blonde head with sky blue eyes to bury his love into. the distance was our downfall.

2013
the boy was earthy, he was brown eyed like oak trees, his veins the limbs, his heart the roots. i poisoned him with nicotine. we kept our brown eyes in the forests with polluted rivers running astray, we told our secrets with no fear. he was selfish, he was keen on his own way. he could not see past his own eyes. brown and murky was his world, diseased ones followed him home. he tried. i tried. we failed.

My head was rested on your chest
Your fingers intertwined in mine
Everything seemed normal again
But we were far from it
You weren't mine and I wasn't yours
We talked for hours
It was so hard to be that close to you but still know
That I did not have you
I wanted you to be mine again
I wanted the world to make sense again

You knew it would be my last moment there
You walked me out and kissed me goodbye
I didn't want to believe that this was going to be my
Last time kissing you
I got in my car and drove away
I drove away for the last time

Standing there
Staring down at myself
I wonder
Would one consider
Me a
Victim
or a
Valiant?

I am flesh
I am bones
I am mania
I am melancholy
I am madness

My clouded reflection eyes me
Like it is analyzing
My every twitch
Trying to decide if
I am a victim of this
Or maybe if it is a victim
That I have saved
It can see that I am dependent
(I depend on the pills
To make a difference)

I stare into blank eyes
A sober face
I touch my rippling reflection
Like I could actually feel it
For what it is
In its true essence
All it does is
Disappear

I look at myself
And wonder
Who took it
And took it from me
In silence
Until I had given it
All away
And silence
Was all I had left?

The surface calms
I can see my face again
My eyes look glossy
Like I am
Somewhere else
(I am)
In the dark mirror
A woman is trying to
Make waves with her legs
No, she is just
Passing by
Am I a victim
To this travesty
I am unintentionally
A part of?
Or am I a hero
Because I have managed
To conquer it
Before it could
Fill me up
And sink me down
Until I
*Disappeared forever?

I was standing in the airport this morning
and thinking of our first kiss,
When I realized I should write you this letter.
I’ve bought a ticket to somewhere far away
a place I know you won’t follow me,
where no one knows my name.

It’s best if you forgot my name
since by next Tuesday morning
you won’t know where to find me.
You’ll know it’s gone, that kiss
and that I’m even father away.
That’s why I’m writing you this letter.

I imagine you’ll burn the crinkled letter
and curse that you ever asked my name
curse my blush when you asked to go out with me.
How you woke up at dawn that morning
How you brushed chocolate off my lips with a kiss
You’d curse you ever fell in love with me

When you escaped to San Francisco with me
you saw all my writing, the poetry, the letters.
You read a poem about dove’s kissing
and you said you loved me by name.
When we woke up in a hotel that first morning
The world couldn’t have felt farther away

But I had plans to fly away
My future wouldn’t make room for you and me
I couldn’t always wake up to you in the morning
I knew one day I’d have to write this letter
That one day I would try and fail to forget your name
That I’d always feel the pressure of that kiss

God, if I could go back to that first kiss
I would push you away
I would tell you to forget my name
To forget everything you would love about me
So I’d never have to send this letter
and wake up so  a l o n e  in the morning

Kiss the memory of me
away and touch the flame to the letter
Sincerely, a nameless girl you loved yesterday morning