The blood that runs through these veins
is as dark as the night sky, and as cold as the coldest breeze
The anxiety in this body hits it's peak by the first kiss of sun's light
The thoughts that flood this mind drive it insane
bringing it to it's deepest possible thought's
All strength is lost
Not a breath can be captured
suffocating from feeling locked away
Every little cell slowly dying
being taken over by the deadliest of viruses
Drifting off into the shadows
not a single being noticing
Screaming as loud as possible
but not a sound is heard
This heart beating for no purpose
slowly slowing down by each pulse
Each given breath leading closed to death

We loved
We fought
We talked
We yelled
We kissed
We made love
I spoke true words
But you spoke false
You said I loved you
Never truly meaning it
I replied I love you too
And meant it with all my heart
You were my top priority
But I was your last
You told me tales
While I told you memories
Behind bars I was told you mourned
But now I believe the little birdy was in on it oo
I stayed loyal
Obviously you didn't
And this is why I don't believe
In those three sweet words
Those three words said too much
And meant too little
A simple I love you
Is now no more than a lie

I'm lost
my mind keeps going blank
Staring blankly at the wall
Gazing down on my right thigh
running my cold fingers across the trails
The trails of my past nightmares
that became my reality
Ended up promising one man ill never do it again
only to have that one man
be on of the reasons it crosses my mind
If I give in what do I gain?
Immortality?
A new beginning?
Blood trickling down my leg
staining the soles of my feet
Invisible foot prints painted bright red
Having my heart bleed out through a leg
isn't painful at all
it only tingles
Slowly growing weaker
I close my eyes to see the light
only to end up in total darkness
with nothing but blood soaked feet

-Mo

Blood to bone
it doesn't matter
All you see
is what I'm not
I don't do drugs
I hardly ever drink
and when I do
It's only a sip or two
But those sips to you
is like a drink or two
I do what I tell you
and nothing more
I tell you my secrets
and all that
Plus much more
But that doesn't matter
no matter what I do
I'm untrusted
Even though you deny
Within your actions it's all true

-Mo

I made you promise to never fall in love
and if you ever did
Not to say a word
But in the end
I was the one who fell under the spell
All I wanted to hear
was those three sweet words
At first I had little belief in love
But you taught me it was real
Now I know it's all a lie
it was all just one big lie
There is no such thing as love
it's a false word
bringing false hopes
Draining the innocence of one's self
out from under their feet
You made me believe in my hopes and dreams
flushing all my anxiety and depression away
You told me things
you wouldn't dare to tell your best friend
We let each other in more than ever
I pushed my own life to the side
Only to help you with yours
I tried helping as much as i could
But that wasn't enough
was anything i did ever?
Whether you were behind steel bars or not
I never gave up on you
You were my knight in shining armor
I was shut out for months
you stating you were only just scared
Scared to lose me
But I promised you never would
but that's a promise
I can no longer keep
Hearing your name
seeing you smile
hearing your laugh
they all bring a smile to my face
Remembering the time we shared together
But within remembering
I cry
you broke my heart
...

Nothing but something
Yet still something but nothing
Love, lust, or death
Love; a four letter word many use in the wrong place
Lust; something you feel when you desire one's beauty
Death; a time in life everyone fears, just refuse to admit
Religion against atheism
Celebrating the birth of Christ and all his works
Or having the lack of belief of anything above or below Earth
Struggling to breath
but not being underwater
Feeling no pain
while standing in a fire
What do you call that?
Depression, anxiety, psychopathic?
Standing between right and wrong
left or right
Right is always right
but left is always... just left
The rabbit in a tree
and a bird in a hole
Seeing isn't believing
believing is seeing
Haven't we all learnt that?
Something always comes from nothing
but how can something come from nothing
if there's simply nothing there?

Where Were You


You said you'd always there for me
That you'll never leave my side
That you’d always be there to help
But where are you at 2:30 in the morning when I wake up crying?
Where are you when i'm screaming at people?
Who aren't even there
Where are you when i'm shrinking in a corner pulling out my hair?
Where are you everytime I text you saying I need help?
What are you possibly doing that you're too busy to answer my 10th phone call?


Where are you when my pale skin becomes stained with blood?
Where are you when the child proof cap comes off a pill bottle
And emptied into my cold palm?
Where are you when I stand stiff
But my whole body continues to shake?


Where can you possible be the rare times I ask for help?


If you're there for me
If you're always by my side
Wanting to help
Then where were you when I needed you the most?

-M.H