Got drunk and I wandered home
Aimlessly aiming
To full speed ahead
Into oncoming training
Myself to be better
Than more walk of shaming
Then blaming my lack of refraining
On some
Inability to
Feel again
More than numb

Then parts of you fade
That once wholly you made
The most vital component
Of how much you made
Not financially
More existential
Affirming
That all intellectual
Causes
I’m earning
The chance to excel
Don’t expel me disgraced
For a harmless,
Albeit now costly
Mistake
But you make of it
Consequence
Where none is needed
And take from me more
Than I ever believed in

Forgot a few songs
Then remembered them later
Attempting to live
To the fullest
And savor
The moment it hits me
And pits me against
What instinctively tells me
It ends in laments
More unbearable
Nay,
More unfathomable
Than the last time
Her tastes
Were unpalatable

It's not that I'm proud
Of mischief
Or misdeed
I don't flaunt
Impropriety
Blithely
At ease
And I often consider
The ramifications
On who is affected
By what I have taken
But still I revert
Consciously,
No remorse
To deliberate persistence
To veering off course
From a straight,
Perhaps narrow
And risk-averse path
But still one of integrity
Balanced, on-track
And progressing ahead
At sustainable paces
But reckless behavior
Is off to the races
The truth is
I like it
The thrill of the steal
The adrenaline, nerve-pumping
Rush
I can feel
And enjoy
I'm remiss to admit
Is the most fun I've had
In this boring cesspit

Don’t want to feel alive
So go switch off
Concede the time
Is not of yours
For any taking,
Any making
Of design
Refuse to speak
Don’t deviate
From fate
Is sealed
In shades of bleak
Rejuvenated
From the enervating
Make a living week
If you go seeking
Conversation
You might find
Only deceit
But when you try,
Revitalized
By what you say
Begets replies

Not quite an impediment,
Seldom a detriment
Just a self-conscious
Propensity to
Pensively reconsider
Each word that I choose
Like anomic aphasia
But undiagnosed
When I can’t comprehend
Even thought’s innermost
Best syntactic formation
Dictates fluctuation
And makes me some ramble-on,
Scrambling to find
What I even intended to say
Half the time
And then oh!
There it is
Where I’m going with this
Yes a piece about speech
And the topics it shifts

Beckoned,
Allured
By her tempting enchantments
The goddess of love
So enraptures me
Granting
Her sirens
Commanded
To pleasure,
Untether me
Take me away
To a world
Of forever free
To be immersed
In this curse
Divine feminine
Elegant in
Its resplendent  
Serenity
Though so detached
I soon longed to return
To one in which man
Had hence from me
Once spurned

Forbidden fruit
Looms over head
Just out of reach
From where I tread
Floodwaters from
Parched-tongue
Receding
Hands outstretched
To branch retreating
Slightly as it seems
To ripen
Spitefully
Invokes excitement
As the luscious
Treasure drips
Each drop eludes
My pursing lips
Resistance to
The torture tempts
Lamenting impudence
Torments
Me from the grace of gods
I fell
Expelled from whence
My hubris wells
Up high upon their pride
They dwell
Bemused, they cease to feud,
Revel
In what their clever
Living hell
Impels me to
Their retributions
Punitive, sin-cleansed
Ablution
Everlasting longing,
Yearning
To escape
These cravings
Burning
Learning all too late
The lessons
Mortals fated
To transgressions
Yet again
Unless they heed
Premonitory tragedies
We leave behind for them to read
And bear in mind
The planted seed

Starting to dream in the language
But wish
Explanation translations
Were easy as this
Seems to be for me
Writing comes naturally,
Freely it flows
But to them it would be
Something only few know
How to even begin
To interpret my syntax
Relaxing and chatting up
Chewing on chat
And for that taking part
Demands speaking it back
But I lack the right words
To talk to them with tact
And enrich conversations
Of indigent thought
With invaluable bundles
Of muses I brought

Eviscerate
Take from me
Leave me defenseless
Who knew
A mistake
Could become
So portentous
Incenses
Ineffably
Target acquired
But seldom is I
The object of my ire

Searching for
Edification
Relation
Not only
Have so much in common
Elation
I guarantee you and I
Aren’t so similar
Maybe I’m salt
And you taste more like vinegar
But
Just because
They go great
When together
Does not mean they should be
Tongue-tipping forever

Now feel it flow through you
The upper
Class privilege
And rip it to shreds
In your miscreant mischief

She is just wow
One I’m thinking ‘bout now
And in subsequent moments
I know she’s around
Won’t forget what she sounds like
Tenacity sweet
And I can’t even speak
Save for when our eyes meet
I’m replete with
A million dumb things I could say
But I don’t overthink it
Just let her hit play
And convey with precision
Her smile,
Her laugh,
Is my only sole mission,
My finalized draft

What comes after
Departure
From my life beyond
Overwhelms me with dread
But she will not be gone
From my head
From my heart
Mark my words
She lives on
And I cherish her memory
Dearest along

The despondent,
Impending,
Oblivion
Vast
That ensues
In her passing,
Impels me to grasp
Desperately
At her fading,
Pervading
My wavelength
I’ll still be here waiting
Delighted,
Enamored,
Ignited
I’ve stammered

To pair with her,
Share with her,
How hard I fell
As if Icarus plummeting
Under her spell
Like an elven enchantress
Divines how my mind
Will respond to the message
And mirror the vibe
Redefines what attraction
Exaction
Could be
In totality
Even the world
Less than she
Means to me

The liberal dove hawkin'
On parakeets squawkin'
Talk 2 different lingos
Up at the board chalkin'
And still stalkin' pages
Of history's past
Until it's what I'm teachin'
To these kids in class

Why does it feel
So romantic to me
If you don’t seem to care
Seem to share
Mutually
I can only write so many poems
Before
I relinquish Lenore
And embrace nevermore
Why implore you
To be more responsive
Or change
If I want that already
It must be too late
For this we stuff to make it
Make sense
Adding up
Want my heart?
It’s yours,
Take it
Just break it enough
To be never forgotten,
Abandoned,
Betrayed
Self-fulfill all your prophecies
I’m here to stay

I wish I had a rhythm
So to set these words in motion
For my flow is as a river
But the dissonance, an ocean
In the ignorance outspoken
From the crashing angel tears
As sky sanctuary cityscapes
Bemuse my ringing ears
With a symphony of fears
Towards celestial ascensions
Too divine to comprehend
My God ethereal dimensions
Where the clouds are my inventions
When I'm feeling so azul
But my mind is Montezuma
My Mexica heart to rule
For the sun is my crown-jewel
And though adorned am I in gold
The power of my sacrifice
Comes from this pen I hold

Whole world is burning
And I just got fired
When did I become
Prone to failing
And mired
In following orders
To still no avail,
For surely some side effects
By compare
Pale
To this ghastly affliction
Still plaguing me thus
I am just
Never good enough
To the side brushed
Like the dust in the wind
Except worth even less
When I clean up my act
I just make a worse mess
Of performances
Albeit standards are high
And at times seem impossible
Why even try

Mud-caked boots
Sink into the human roots
Habesha people make their homes
Of sticks and stone
Ancestral bones asleep beneath  
The Rasta prince’s lion throne
Divining water into honey wine
An extra month, some years behind
A sense of time unfettered by
Gregorian design
For here is where imperials in arms
Still fear to tread
But Terrors Red still fed the masses
With some promise broken bread
And circuses of war and bloodshed
Left a union in its stead
It stands unconquered on the continent
A gateway to the heavens
Conjures torrents from the halkan sky
With mighty independence
To remind the lone ferenji
Of its wild zealot prayer
And then at peace it shares its secret
Unrequited love affair

This isn’t so bad
When we hear what we read
But I still want to speak to you
Love you and leave
You know me
Always running
Away from the conflict
But seeking it out
Like a wannabe convict
I’m on to the next
Best political tact
To be one with the people,
Methodically act  
Like I own the place
Homeless
Or housed in a hopeless
Rich fortress of decadence
My magnum opus
Is penned either way
And each night to you gifted
A piece of the me that day
Puzzle unscripted

Immediate longing
For you when alone
Irresistible urges
Keep checking my phone
And when sudden emerges
The blue little dot
All my prior engagements
Already forgot
Now my worded arrangement
Bouquets
I convey
And take care to precisely
Concisely display
The true colors
Of my
Truest lovers’
Goodbyes
Across canvas oblivion
Spilling insides

Just need a few minutes
Reiterate interest
Respond to my text
And then shut up and listen
To anything
You have to say
When we meet
When we see how we look
As we talk and we eat
But I can’t help but wonder
Between now and then
How much day can transpire
Before hitting send

Rendered expendable
Merits commendable
Just not the right
Fit for you
At this time
Heard it once before
Now
I can’t leave it behind
Wasn’t good enough
Failed
To meet standards  
Unfair
And availed no comparison
Income upscaled
But I’m making more now
Doing less than I’d hoped
I’m the office space coffin’s
New friendliest ghost

They had a big heart
Know they did
Why they died
They were living
For eating
And dying inside
Unreservedly love
They imparted to others
But bound to their
Cravings
The decadence
Smothers
And deeper
In deeper-dish
Dissonance
Lingers
The blood sugar
Insulin
Plantation’s cane
Now the Neo-Monopoly’s
Game of weight gain

Sorrow is loss
I believe
I can feel it
And any man's hand
Has the will
To reveal it
But that of a creature
Unknown to your kind
Is required to grasp the kind
Of which is mine

I’ve never seen
Your eyes so red
Just look at me
Tell me
The dread
Is welling now
Remember you
In everything
I thought I knew
Was you
Was me
Just make it bleed
Just make it never
End
In grief
Just don’t reduce
Us to
Deceit
Unless I’m with you
All I knew
And comes to see
The world anew

I do this again
And again
And again
Hurt the ones that I love
When love’s all
I intend
To stay true to its course
To renew its remorse
To resort
To finality’s
Looming divorced
From reality’s
How much I try
Just to fail
Disappoint you
Go down with the ship
As you bail
Walk away
Without saying
If this is goodbye
That you’d really feel
Better off
Waiting to die
Or devising
Some sooner conclusion
Exclusion
Of me and you lost
To the cost
Of delusion
But needless
Assurances
Meet expectations
Like promises break
Before I even make them
Just stake them through hearts
And return to my coffin
My solitude tombs
Of increasingly often
Immersed in your silence
Where my mistakes shriek
I am puny,
Irrelevant,
Useless,
And weak

Graduated with honors,
Made love like a beast
Earned my place among the muses,
Then championed peace  
The world over
Alone
Far from home
Have I roamed  
And then into my tombstone
I chiseled unknown
But no, never forgotten
A rose from the coffin
My unfinished business
To witness the autumn
From where I was raised
To emblazon its flare
Like the winter fox
Facing
The mighty black bear
Have I tread on undaunted,
By her ever haunted,
Heartbroken
I wrote to her
Lost and exhausted

But never lost sight
Quite completely
Of who
I am proud
Son of Judy
And friend of the few
Coolest dudes on this rock
And imbued with their brotherhood
Seek to unlock
What we’ve yet to learn
Searching
The infinite depths
Even if
All we find
Is an imminent death
We were here
We were real,
Redefined how we feel
Our ideals indomitable,
Adamant steel
And unyielding our strive
To be more than alive
So let this be my testament
Ever in time

But see that’s why it’s nuts to me
Waiting on you
Since I did it to you
Without thinking it through
To conclusion
Seclusion
Is where I am now
But adapting my senses
Eternally
Bound
To communicate human
And state what my prey is
Conveying the union’s
Peace beast in his cages
Lay waste the creators
With demon exertion
And purge the earth-fakers
With worthy subversion
Befitting the finest
Idealists at play
Our posterity learning
Their brilliant display
Is the way we keep turning
With all it in tune
And that even delusions
Can land on the moon

Your causes are broken
I’m bending through hoops
Your free speech is verboten
In tending to groups
Thinking no more abortion
Just lawful contortion
Of what formerly
Would’ve hanged for
Extortion
Endorsements
Of donor class
Actors
Who funnel
Our funds
Through their private jet
Public debt
Tunnels
And I am just funnily
Flipping the pages
And balancing beaming
To multiple stages
As wages stagnate
And the nation implodes
And the state is a circus
Of nobody knows

Almost had me there
Pit of despair
In succumbing
To what degradations
Would see me becoming
Your most faithless servant
Though loyal to fault
Go to war against joy
In an all out assault
On good tidings
And pleasantries
Kindly dispense
With impediments
Left
On my path to contempt
And I’d hold them all
Equally
Most firmly
In it
A judge
And not one
Crack of smile
Forgiven

We triumph for those who have known us in glory
And in utter ruin remember the story
Acknowledge our valor, our power to keep
Braving all odds unheeded, march into the deep
Preserving a legacy not quite our own
Be of foes we have bested to reclaim the throne
Or of people we’ve wrested from brinks of despair
Abject in their poverty, dreamless nightmare
As we serve higher causes of righteous assurance
Our quest ever dauntless against the abhorrence
An amoral mass of the impure intent
In our ascent raise them from endless lament
To depart from a world to for years we have been
But as shadows to those of us living in sin
For it is but of ours time itself meets its fate
And begins to devour us all in its gape

Can’t rely on a like
And a message
To smile
This find a wife life
Will get old
In a while
And already starting
To bore me
In normalcy
Promising prospects
Condemn me
Remorselessly
Playing the field
With my feelings
Exposed
Vulnerabilities
Shared
Should’ve kept them
Enclosed
In these letters to no one
Specifically reading
Intentions and purpose
To keep them from leaving

Am I forcing it into
The pieces this way
When away from you
Carry myself so astray
And dismay takes a hold
Of my loneliest soul
As I rope-a-dope
Sleep paralytics
Ice coal
Becomes ashen and smitten
With progress unmade
Like the lovers of Aerth
Are just free-traded
Slaves
And their ego waves
Must satiate the mass graves
Not the one
He beside her
So desperately craves

If I perish five minutes
From now
In some tragedy
Weep not for me
Just pass on
My depravity
Let my insanity spread
To each head
Propagate my disease
Like a plague to be read
And in bold anonymity
Mark my tombstone
Still unknown the identity
Of the Alone

Not saying I like it
Just how that it works
The deletist type brightest
In caverns we lurks
And we hungers
And wonders
Why these rolling thunders
Still storm through the deserts
And homes torn asunder
The poorest pulled under
The war is swept under
The covers
The monsters and terrors are out there
Two lovers
Come back here to make a new start
Some new art
Then the silence between them
Just rips it apart
Like Cupid is cute but he’s stupid
The truth
Is the fear
That your heart doesn’t really or actually break
But some dreamer just takes it and makes it awake
Like you finally care about
Some other thought
You’re no longer concerned with
The ones you were taught
In the eyes turned to stone
By the furies they wrought
Upon ignorance
All the injustice perceived
In a world lost together
In us we’d believe
That it’s all meant to be
There was you, there was me
And from there it was frozen
And stranded at sea
For there’s always the one
That you just want to lie with,
Always the one that you still want to try with,
Always the one that your spilling guts cry with,
Always the one you so perfectly vibe with,
Always the one you can’t stop the goodbyes with,
Always the one you would **** to survive with,
Never the one that you ever will DIE WITH

I am chaos
I am the substance from which your scientists and artists build rhythms
I am the spirit with which your children and clowns laugh in happy anarchy
I am chaos
I am alive
And I tell you
You are free

Not waking
Lately
Don’t make me
Don’t wait
For the rest of my body
To recalibrate
To the normal world
Torn from
The phantasmagoric
Inert,
Idle,
Derelict,
Lacking euphoric
Or seldom
If ever
Revamping
Its lamp
Just reminding myself
I’m still caught in its trance

Cast your spells
Ring your bells
I draw
The parallels
Back to the basics
Of human equations
Mentation
Illuminates
Merely gestations
Are not quite the squirming
The learning
The earning
The born to
A bullet storm
Mourning
World burning

Out in the woods
No one knows
Where the road goes,
Go any further
To find
You don’t either,
Just sit and stare
Mesmerized
By the fire
The other side
Crawling with mischievous nymphs
Seductress
In the silence
I court the abyss

The energy is everything
It's what you want, it's what you need
It takes your minds
Invades your brains
It lulls you to the gorgon's veins
Then leaves you hungrier
For more
And more
Of what's in store

But post-apocalyptic shelves
Inhabited by Keebler elves
And then the madness
Dial tone
Alone you are the smartest phone
When data roaming airplane mode
Connects you to the electrode

The power plant
The Tesla coil
In a world that runs on oil
You control the game of thrones
And carbon life forms in the soil
All that's left for you to do
Is figure out which ones are loyal

Still bringing machines
To their knees
With the ease
Of my sentient,
Sentiment
Sensory
Gene
With the band and I
Slam-piecing
Klans
On demand
As we’re pilfering
*****-grab hand’s
Contrabands
And still planning
The getaway
Waste away lands
To the sands
Bring the vibes
And imbibe
The revival
Survival is our
Existential time trial
And its
Human race
We replace
With the state
Of our **** the sys-tem
We’re immune to its hate
And then in its wake
Break
Former orders
And judge
Them to be
History,
On its pages a smudge

Waiting game
Changing
And entering overtime
Interviews better
Unfolding
Inside my mind
Where I don’t have to be
Dressed to impress
To be nervous-calm
Nullified’s
Stuttering mess
But the pressure
Is lifted
By others of vision
Who understand
Novice’s provenance
Mission
Begins with intentions
And ends with the skills
Understands I am here
Not to merely pay bills

The kid state of nature
Still brutish and short
I’m the wretch in the bowels
You couldn’t abort
Still distorting the false narrative
In my favor
I savor the suffering
Graven slave labor
Unwavering in
Serpent eyes of the tyrants  
Attesting my patients’
Rapaciousness virus  
To stop making conflict
Where none need exist
You American
Simpleton
Cease and desist
On insisting
Your cancerous culture
Still answers
The question
Who watches the watchers
With voter rights tamper
If viewer discretion
Advised,
Advertised
Still decides
The election
And class divides
Settle
The natural selection

Don’t remember
All details
Only how it ends
In fails
Have such profound
Epiphanies
More than a few
Deficiencies
Like some innate
Impulse
To pull
Over their eyes
The veil of wool

Just one of the misfits
The mystics
The mythic
Enthusiasts  scripting
My own hieroglyphic
Codex to keep written
Recordings
Just jot
A few thoughts
Down each day
To see how they all look
Rearranged on the page
And that even I can't
Comprehend of this message
Perhaps in the future
Invaluable lesson
Is gleamed
From what seems
To be power mad schemes
But this world I will leave
Having not conquered even
A parcel of land
For I already hold
The whole world in my hand

There isn’t a hardship
Equipped
To bare me
Nor a tale of it told
In
Insincerity
Just awareness
No reader
Among them
Resides
Just illiterate
Intellects
Dressed in disguise
A convincing visage,
An officious veneer
Behind curtains
Be certain
Not what they appear
To embody
Exemplify
Buy buy bye bye
Just greet more of it smiling
And make us rely
On reposting they’re not
All that different from us
But before the law
Only in flawed
Do we trust
Not a perfect
Utopian
Book tally ban
Nor the killing machine
In the palm of its hand

Not veracity
But frequency
Determining
The truth
And it is just
How many times
The jingle ringing
Ears of youth
Have heard
Routinely
What is schemingly
Alluring
And seductive
And its limiting
Abilities
To reasoning
Deductive
What its function
Is inherently
To pacify
The meek
But in reality
Adherents
Are empowering the weak