You always bring me down
To earth
Just when it seems
I’ve bested you
You ground me in reality
As soon as I’m convinced
I flew
Up to the sky
You keep me from
My hands outstretched
Towards the sun
Yet even if I touched it
Or I clutched it in
A crushing grasp
You’d pull me to its blazing core
Reducing me to thermal gas
With ineluctable
Reductions
To my mass
And weightlessness
I’d sooner crash
Impacting on the surface
An extinction-grade
Atomic blast
Yet still I try,
Defy,
Deny
Your being without form or shape
Descending even now, pretending
There is some escape
From flightless fates
And leaps of faith
In your breath-taking power
Plummeting just like a penny
Dropping from the tallest tower

This game is like life
Build your roads
Conquer lands
Construct homes
And expand
As your city erodes
Into seas of surpluses
Exhausted too quickly
A populous guarded
But hungry and sickly
So play it just like
How you’d really develop
A civilization
As god
Not a zealot

Stay the same
Let me learn
In burning
Let me turn
Insane
In vain discerning
Love is made
Where none now dare
To enter pain
I see her smiling
At me
Widely
Wildly gleaming
In her eyes
Betrays she might
Assume disguise
To try me on for size
Fits all
To please her
Beckon call

This is not your home
More a land of enchantment
We dream for the high-rising
Homeless encampment
We pray for salvation
Pay for
Subjugation
And waive our proud colors
For brand names
Emblazoned
And raised in
This race-based
Freemason’s e-state
Is to learn
Lady Liberty’s
Lecherous villainy
Some more illusory
Profits
Grand wizardry
Class-driven
Rifts
Of consumerist misery
So be forewarned
Welcomed all as you are
This is not opportunity
Knocking that hard
It’s just no-knocking
Crack rock
The vote
By design
It’s injustice for all’s
Justice
Taking the bribe
This is men left behind
ALL THE TIME,
ANYTIME
For a nickel
And dime
Violent crime
Rates are high
But the views
Are sublime
So remember in venturing
Here
On vacation
Be it
Permanent
Or a special occasion
Again, I implore you
Be sure that these shores
Are a lot more
Than more than enough
Food in store

It always includes
Ruling classes
And taxes
Sometimes the form differs
The law always passes
Agreed upon by
Select few who renew
Their extravagance through
The consent of the governed
To pay what is due
To the papacy pew
As indulgences, tithes
Coincide with the sins
That accrue
Piled high to the sky
Where the heavens would cry
To know God's blessed children
Live only to die
As they serve the false prophets
Who claim they can fly
And it seems they're content
As to never know why
Such a system relies
On the spreading of lies
Until lo and behold!
No surprise,
Out of time

Still answer commanders
With unrefined candor
Like demagogues unto
The masses
I pander
Outlander
I’m not from around here
You see
I’m just peregrinations
And sol...iloquy

Starving egomaniacs
Hide the distention
Dysmorphia’s
Orphans
Engorging attention
Pretension
Comes natural
Just live to be seen
To be lust after
Vanity
Fair magazine
To be queen
In your castles,
Your carriages,
Gowns
To be columns
Of gossip
And talks of the town
Chopping down
Natural art
For a heartless
Creation
A faux fabrication
From deforestation
A waste of
The vacant
High-minded
High-rise
Like the hungry,
Neurotic
Consumer’s
Disguise

I work in the future
And thrive in the past
I live in the now
For I’ve mastered this class
Armageddon
Armed conflict
Is messy and grim
Is maniacal
Viral
Beheadings to spin
For extinct
My distinction
From that which
You cling
To popularity
As currency
Concurrently
A shopping spree
And I am just an old,
Fossilized,
Unwritten history
Predating
And presaging
Starkly raving
Of the grave
For I have been there
I have seen it
I have marched
In its parade
And I will be there at the end
To watch it all go up in flame
And in the eons passing by
They will assign me
A new name

We all like to think ourselves
Somewhat enlightened
That answers abound
And that nothing
Is frightening
Delight in at least
Moderation
Elation
But how long before
The excessive temptation
Becomes decadence
Abrogation of morals
And tireless virtue
Can’t rest on its laurels
In good conscience
Faith
An abnormal distortion
Forsaken
Replaced
By debased disproportion

I pose as this person by day
Who admits
To the others, his brothers
No god he submits
To more regal in splendor
More real in its form
More unruly enraged in
Its wrath firestorm
None its equal in might
Of life-giving aflame
The sol only creator
False prophets disclaim
But in vain is my quest
To convince them or dare
For with all of their deities
Mine gladly shares
Its irrefutable
Undisputed dominion
Across the sky realms
Of religious opinion
And sets upon Earth
With its mercy in tow
Reappearing each day
As its progeny grows
To discover the omniscient
Secrets it frequents
In flight, alight bright
Until someday, we reach it

Staunchly the vanguard
Far flung is my beachhead
And only the sirens
Have sung of my weakness
And lonely horizons
As distant as memories
Unparalleled
In bestowing serenities
Woe and beholding
Idyllic illusion
All coming to ruin
As foolish delusion
Intrusion deep into
My psyche sanctorum
Fixated on finding
My place in the forum
Beside the belied
Circumscribed
Happenstance
But encounters as resonant
Subject to chance
And entranced
Unperturbed
Or intrigued
I’m romanced
Just as easy as wind
Finds its way through the world
Just as natural
As any boy
Talks to a girl

Bend the knee to the rich
You don’t want any trouble
You’re unprepared, not fit to serve
In the struggle
These people don’t know you
Don’t need you around
Like a living dead man
Needs a hole in the ground
For some reason request
You to come be there guest
Guess they just want to test
If the westerners’ best
But rhetorically asking
Why do they think my words are better than theirs?
They are no more than barriers languages
Share
They are clunky and clumsy
And sound like **** smells
Just divorcee romance is dead
Wedding bells
A cacophonous clangor
Of clamorous bliss
But you know I’m the greatest
To ever exist
Reminiscing on all the abysses
I’ve missed

But I cannot lie to you
Soon enough die for you
Told you I’d wait
Hesitate
My goodbye to you
Even in doubt
You return to my sight
Or without you
Before me
To read what I write
I would carry on lonely
Just solely compelled
By the still so elusive
Lost homeliness
Dwelled
In its absence
Move past this
Impossible choice
For each option
A toxin
No hope to rejoice
If I go
I relinquish
My life’s work
Amounting
To stay
In old ways
I can spend the days
Counting
The fortune amassed
At last
Watch myself tear at
The seams
Fall apart
If you’re not here to share it

Been away from it
Days
In estranged disgrace
Chasing
Some sleep
But my feet
Still insist in outpacing
The time it requires
To enter the rem
As a kid could be hours,
In seconds, now ten
All it takes
Stay up late
And before dawn awake
Just to do it all over again
Double take
But it’s hard to break habits
Convenience’s sake
If the pay out
Is played out
It’s still making sense
To be teaching my craft
And then drafting laments
Even if I’d prefer
Eulogies
Evergreen
Be they natural,
Pack a bowl
What does it mean?
Or the digital
Black as coal
Money machine

See all their faces
They all disappear
Then I’m here
Retrospectively
Counting the years
Where they went
Where they go
Never know
Grow apart
For however ephemerally
Had my heart
In their clutches
Caresses
Embraces
Misplaced
What we felt for each other
Like markings erased
But it makes
Perfect sense
Every time
Looking back
Couldn’t perfectly
Change
For each other
Exact

Then parts of you fade
That once wholly you made
The most vital component
Of how much you made
Not financially
More existential
Affirming
That all intellectual
Causes
I’m earning
The chance to excel
Don’t expel me disgraced
For a harmless,
Albeit now costly
Mistake
But you make of it
Consequence
Where none is needed
And take from me more
Than I ever believed in

Be my nihilist bride
Or my activist pride
Just confide unreservedly
Deepest dark side
‘Cause I’m not a type guy
Just respond well to kind
To compassion
Attraction
To nourish my mind
Stimulate it with questions
Then bore me to tears
Stay up unto the dawn with me
Sharing your fears
Then exemplify
Every day after
Resolve
To with me
Or without me
Still strive to evolve
To improve
On your still left to lose
Inhibitions
Unless we’re both trippin’
On pure intuition
And then can the chemistry’s
Most volatile
Compatible match
Validate your profile

Moments eternalize
There in your eyes
And I crystallize
Memories
Nemeses
Vie
For a seat at the table
A place in the stable
And I am still willing
To gladly
Disable
My sought after
Loveless
Redemption’s
Return
To companionship’s
Rift abyss
Feelings confirmed
In the actions and words
Undeterred
Unreserved
Until my
Hope to die
Guilty sentence is served

And it’s on to the genocide
After you labeled me
Branded, enslaved me
Then as a beast, stabled me
Tabled my questions
And grievances then
Made me feel I was less
Than a man among men
When some semblance of freedom
Was finally reached
You just kicked down the doors
As our homelands were breached
And then preached your divine
Racial right to rule,
Hatred fuel speech
Then you slaughtered my people
In droves
As was shown
To the rest of the world
A facade
Mockery history
As it added more jobs
To polluted and muted
Vox populi rooted
In fear that their name
Is the next new recruited
To die by the bullet
The blade or the bang
Or the furnace forged famine’s
Frail hope hunger pang

Oh no I just live here
Just try to exist here
Don’t own my own home
Rather roam
Open road
Than be humble
Abode
Welcome guests
Nonetheless
To my house party
Mode
Where I’ll make your acquaintance
Conversing renascence
And cohabitate
With all
Homeostasis

I got your traumatic
In peace
Wreakin’ havoc
And bring the disorder back
Full automatic
Been trackin’ the fascists
Since smilodon reigned
And still fashionin’ spears
For that ***** paw’s claim
Left’em slain
As a stain
On prehistory’s cave
Where I offered the primitives
Visions ablaze
And made slaves
Of the shadows
They caste
Off their chains
And together we toiled
In disparate ****
Till the spirit of Waqqa
The crescent moon lit
Sickle gripped,
Sinews ripped,  
Chattel whipped and equipped
With the will to subsistence
Existence
Resist
And from such a collective
No lord could evict
Who was with
The community
Even me
Free
From the fossilized,
Privatized,
Posted sign,
Property
Paradise cost
But a Lost World’s
Monopoly

Warned that this path would lead
Seemingly nowhere...
So get to the problem,
Too many to solve them
Too different to see
The same ways
We evolve in
All crawl from the ooze
But all grow
To refuse
To return to its void
Like a bottle of *****

Don’t do it
For photo ops
Drops in the ocean
Of countries landlocked
In a box
Of emotionless
No self-promotion
Is known to this
Hopelessness
Open for business
But closed
To its promises
No profit-motive
Enriches this soil
A child with food
Shoes
And school books
Is spoiled
Yet toils still
Tilling
The barren waste
Rills
Cicatrizing the surface,
Eroding the hills
The foreboding,
Foreshadows,
Forecast
Upon vast
Splitting cracks
In an earth
Disappearing
Too fast
In the hazy horizon
Night tempest’s
Caprice
In precipitous
Rage
Ways of keeping
The peace
An itinerant,
Transient
Seeking
Enlightenment
Sees not the paving
Of slaves
In its bright intent

Excuses
Excuses
Make me
A reclusive
Reduced to
Expecting the worst
Kind of mutant
Aberrant
Outlander
Unwelcome
Across
The whole globe
Have I strove
To belong
And get lost
Concomitantly
Constantly
Claim contradictory
Opposite views
At least two
Sides are needed
But always the one
Whose mere presence is fleeting
And then there is me
‘Bout to go unresponsive
For by
Dead of night
Silences
I am haunted

I tripped and I thought of you
Somewhere out there
It was clear
What I ought to do
Start to repair
The malfunctioning
Mechanized
Rusting organic
Still running on fumes
Like a thermodynamic
Volcanically
Manic
Depression
Sets in
And it comes and it goes
Through my wearing thin skin
And therein
Can my cells’
Mitochondrial jolt
By the god of storms
Galvanize
My thunderbolt

If once upon a time could bring back
Fairy tales I chased outside
Enchanted forests in my mind
I’d write my fabled hero labors
With a hint of her sublime
Confusion, calm and innocence
Her sorrow eyes as elegant
As ballerina dancing leaves
The steps we sat upon and spoke
Of nothings sweeter than the sound
Of incandescent laughter chiming
All around us in the air
The crisp of autumn on her lips
That taste of lust amidst her kiss
Betwixt us coalescing pure
Was love in its imperfect form
Simplistic as the heart is deep
Intricacies as numerous
As any secrets I could keep
Of no day more fortuitous

Inexorable changes
Await and could make me
The never the same again
Pain doesn’t phase me
Just days I go vaguely
Recalling the slightest
Fell trace of destruction
Of ego, my plight is
Temporal but permanent nonetheless still
For impermanence claims
My longevity’s will
My mortality withers
And wanes in the draining
Of acid rains flash flooding
Rolling plains staining
My unblemished vision
Of earth in decay
All our cares, all our fears
Gently washing away
In the ease in which loneliness
Courts me with avarice
Beckons me solemnly
Swiftly to selfishness
Inwardly drowning
In what can I gain
All in vane again
Feigning my ignorant blame
On all who’d oppose
My nefarious ends
Upon all of the roads
I pave
Goodness intends

If you think that it’s fated
Just go ‘head and state it
Just say that you stayed
All too long
In awaiting
For me to be
Some kind of man
You’d expect
To be there all the time
Not the mind who’d object
To the social injustice,
The coup d’etat bloodless
The ******* plays
Charlemagne
To the Dulles
Insurgencies crushed
By the hush of corruption
The lush ****** lands  
***** by corporate seduction
The merciless,
Unyielding
****** of production
Duplicitous,
Profligate
Lust of consumption
The numb to the slum
Mum’s the word battle won
And some
Before even
The Russian bear stirred
Others still
Before even
The King Leo purred
When the purge isn’t fiction
I urge the revision
Enlist in the war
Upon carbon emission
And see with the heat-seeker
Serpentine vision
But spit it unwritten,
Unscripted
If needed
Concede not an inch
Of this ethical Eden
And in the endgame
Existential
Checkmate
Is the movement I make
To still you
Captivate

I said depressing
Not depression
One describes
And one implies
A more immutable
Condition
A disorder
We disguise
And when revealed
To you
It seals
Your condemnation
Of my plight
For I am just
The silence shrieking
In the darkest depths
Of night
And this is just
A cry for help,
An SOS,
A desperate plea
That resonates
In your commiseration  
So inaudibly

No flag
No anthem
No country
Remains
In the aftermath
Rapturous
History stains
We will just be
Statistics
An unfulfilled
Wish list
Accords
And concurrent
Perfidious
Pacts
Like a carbon offset
In the form of an axe
No more acts
We need action
Not actors
And stages
For theaters of war’s
All our avarice
Wages

Citizens
And denizens
Behold the city ruins
Sins
The toxic pit
Of veterans
Overprescribed
Their medicines
Americans
Addictive state
Its own worst enemy
Equate
In theory
Its ideals
Foretold
A sheepish populous
Controlled
And molded by
Their tales of old
The power brokers
Chokehold
Sold
Us all a panacea
To the ills of governed men
Just convince them they are free
Increase the ease
With which they spend

This digitized age
In a monetized cage
An embarrassing stain
On my Meta verse page  
Disengage from it all
I’m ashamed to be human
If all we aspire to be
Techno Union
In ruins though still
Cities sink in the sea
And the forests consumed
By the me industry
What to gain
And possess
What to have
And to hold
As skyrocketing prices
Become a black hole
Of black gold
In demand
But supply lines
Are drawn by
Invisible hand
And command economics
Still branding the tyrants
In stoking this broken
Woke culture war
Virus
This token protest
When it ought to be
RIOTOUS
Spare me your fair-weather
Advocate piousness
Bias confirmed
Now submit to your highness
And stick to your screens,
Salivate to the violence,
Relinquish your voice
As they thrive in the silence

Typical, miserable
Modern life listical
Sticky note overload,
Stuck in a
Cyclical
Course of correction
Yet barely
Dirigible
Sense of direction
I aim for perfection
But always fall short
Through disorganized
Scatterbrained
Thoughts have to sort
Through the stress-induced fog
To dispel the despair
And repair it with
Documents left to prepare
For performance evals
And a palace of somber
Senescence
Deep into the night
Do I ponder
And wonder how much
Longer, I must endure
An existence in which
Only loveless allures
Me to strive for the end
Of the infinite
Endlessness
Watching the world
Melt away
Like my sentences
Leak on the page
Of polemicist rhetoric
Nobody cares
So I drain it of sentiment
Grin and I bare
The next day’s
Falling tenement

This community
Of color
Is a dark distorted lover
Off the lot
Missed her a lot
When you’re the arid swamp
Despot
And misbegotten
Bird of mocking
Make the penman
Fill the plot
And not a thought is lost
On motions passed
In petty Freddy Gray
In petty cash,
In gaseous masks
In play bills on parade
Just herbal verbal
supplementals
Twigs and cap and spores
And scores of elemental
Muses
Understory roars
When force alone
Can often turn
The people on the camera
And suddenly it’s like
Entire worlds
Are out to scam ‘ya
It’s a capital imperial
Dominion
Taking hold
And Capitol-attacking
Masses
Who still want it for
The gold

Is this why I do
What I picture
Undone
Why internalized voices
All rolled into one
Like a gun to the temple
Corroding the psyche
Gets triggered in silence
Appearing unsightly
Unloading its violence
In public now
No chance
I’ll ever come quietly
Not so politely
Conveying anxiety
Try as I might
To cast doubt
And aspersion
There’s something unspeakably
Sinister
Lurking
And surfacing
So close
To breaking the skin
Is its
Solace in madness’s
Most aloof grin

Math is just
Infinitude
Of numbers
And equations
No one wants
And no one needs
Until the alien invasions
Leave its stringy theories
Tangled
In another quantum zone
As they incessantly perplex
And vex
My x equals unknown
And though I add,
Subtract,
And multiply,
Divide
I just can not abide
By geometric principles
Misshaping my
Befuddled mind
Despite the fact  
They tie together
Everything
We make believe
Is probable
To e mc
And make us see
All calculations
Possible

Unruly young dragon,
Recalcitrant, sneers
Disobeys,
Breathing flames
In sheer rage perseveres
On outstretched wings displays
His magnificence,
Marvelous, mighty
Indifference
Impudence
Not so incredulous when
Still untamed he has tempered
His vain fire spin
In ascendency
Soars,
Striking fear when he roars
Indomitable
Kanto kid’s king
Dinosaur

Since when did the weekend
Become such a drag
Through the mud-sodden,
Down-trodden
Lack of hashtag
Merely lagging behind
The industrialized
Celebration of making it
More civilized
Advertised for the rest
To behold such success
And to flaunt its extravagance
Fanciest dress
To get messed up in public
With no consequences
Except apprehended's
Outlandish expenses
Now palisade fences
Like barricades render me
Stultified, dead inside
Life I pretend to be
Life of the party no more,
Who is that?
Former specter of my
Sordid, unsorted past
Which I long to remember
Its tenderest moments
The days I could actually love
Earnest romance
Seem now altogether
As severed from my
Memory as forever
Awaits me to die

Blank me out
Stare
At my pair of
Disguise
Wipe me out
Like a drought
When you answer
The whys
The goodbyes
Must ensue
Seem to always
Come true
Never quite
Empathize
What we really go through
Just conclude
Only ends
No escape
No return
The wound mends
The mind bends
Ever love
Never learn
There is no perfect union
Just fragments
Of whole
Optimistic
Endeavor’s
Unreachable goal
So forget’er
World nether
Embrace
The amnesia
Induced by my
Loosening
Trip synesthesia

I lost my patience years ago
Now I just wait and bide my time
I sit and stare and step inside
Another portal to immortal
Existential everything
Dominions that are taking over

There once was a man
Who had grown gravely ill
Moribund, wrote a last will a night
But the love all around him by day
Brought him peace
And with that came a reason to fight

For the honor it was
He considered it so
To keep it alive and secure
To share and to teach it to others
And lovers
And ask in return nothing more  

Than to leave them his art
All the pieces he’d found
In a some sense-discernible form
After falling apart
With it shattered and tattered
And scattered all over the floor

Just take it
Disgraceful
Exploitative snakes
Your duplicitous
Subterfuge
Scam aggravates
Me to no end
Dependent
On what you provide
Just another class luxury
Robbing me blind
Been deprived
A lot worse
And still found a connection
To internet speeds
Expediting depression
And I will secure its
Expanses of bandwidths
As if overlords
Of the data plan
Planned it

Disappointment
Disaffection
Petty
Passive
Non-aggression
Penniless
Go hide your shame
Sequester worthless ****
You claim
Is yours
Is mine
Is borderline
Insane,
Another childish game
Except this time
It’s life we play
And now your place,
Is dead...
Last
Withdraw into
Your sugar crash
Your hash-induced
A’straying path
Will only lead to glass
Enclosures  
Shattering in full disclosures
We were closer
Long before
Our bedrooms weren’t right next door

I will always be the shadow
Seldom seen,
Rarely heard
Barely verbalizing
Any
Written,
Stutter
Spoken word
But on the mountain
In the fog
I am the ghost
Of mostly gone
I am forgotten,
Undesired,
Disappearing
All along
You cannot find me,
Just remind me
To at times
Make presence known
And should I feel like talking
Only locking eyes
With her alone

Repression
Of urge
To be free
Be incontinent,
Unreserved,
Unbridled
Me
But you don’t want to see it
Can’t understand
Anger
When I express pain
You assume
You’re in danger
A stranger
It’s made me
To put on the smile
Pretend
I intend
To be calm for awhile
That I do not seethe
With the need
To defile
The idols,
Injustice,
Hypocrisy,
Greed
And the temples
They’ve built
And the laws
They’ve decreed
So I leave it to you
To decide
What I do
Either storm out in rage
And let madness ensue
Or eschew
From another miscast
Make a scene
Featuring
My hostility’s
Daily routine

Inward seeking
Shrinking violet
Red dwarf
Morphing
Into silent
Shades evade
Intrusive gaze
A spotlight on
An empty stage
Arrayed for how I play
The role
Of one’s so growing older
Soul
Where love is found
Less in caress
But more in what
I can’t express

How wise we’d all be
If life was a service
If human the union
Could be how we learn this
Unlimited truth
Is to simply be me
Don’t be her, don’t be him
Just enjoy what you see
As another story
That begins and then ends
With some greater god’s glory
A hunger for power
And global dominion
Though mortals imbue them
With what they envision
As happiness wealth
And more land than they need
For a place for the self
And a garden for Eve

But now everything’s changed,
So much ice
In the veins
In the air
In the room
In the gloom
It contains
Hurting you
Hurting me
Is now all that remains
And we don’t feel the same
As we used to before
When I open the door
It’s like bracing for war
And I see us still trying
To desperately cling
But we keep going back
To the same exact thing
Such irreparable harm
Such appalling disgrace
Can’t erase
The betrayal
Just watch as it breaks
Us down further
In fervor
In heartache
Inveigh
When no terms of endearment
We have left to say

Every night since
It’s subliminal
Hints
It’s the criminal
Underworld’s
Underling
Prince
That evinces
His regal
Enfeebled ambition
With pride
His exile
Erstwhile form’s
Normal disguise
Circumscribed
To confined
To confide in himself
For how could they relate
Even less
Could they help