But the sun doesn't shine
Upon me
As it used to,
Feel so attached to
My precious devices
And harnessing its
Divine potency
Just to see
Seems as if I'm
Disregarding its poetry
Blind to abusing its glow
To be shown
An ephemeral glimpse
Of some remnant of home
But its spark does not energize
My own creations
Just sates them with meager
Technology rations
And hooks me to wires
And cables
Like playthings

It takes so much effort,
All my mental faculty
To see them equal
And deem it veracity,
Their brain capacity
Actually seems
To be emptier than
The most vacuous dreams
And my intellect screams
At the sky in defiance
But I can't deny
They are so absent-minded
At least in the ways
Of the sociopath
Who has grasped civilized
By the throat as its gasped
In the clutches of what is
Its ultimate form
I became
What it could be
An apex new norm,
But to them
I am just
Foreign ****,
Over-privileged
A money tree grown
In a garden of riches
Which just goes to show
How so little they know
Of the world as a whole
As they waste away
Playing their chattering role
Their ambition consists of
A ball and a goal
They aspire to be
What they're told
And accept
That in death they will pass into
God's divine breadth
Every breath they draw
Gnawing
On better addictions
Their language has less than
A dozen descriptions
No gifted musicians
Inspire their craft
All essentially cultural elements
Lack
And the fact is
They are just so different from me
Too condemned to this poverty graveyard
To see
That despite such a site
To behold
I am free
To be living among them
Harmoniously

Try as I might
To ignore the insufferable
Clamorous racking my brain
All too audible
Are these despicable
Sickening shrill
Voices wicked, malicious,
Insipid kids still
Instigating and baiting
Me closer to spill
My contempt vitriol
Seething passion to ****
Every little last filth-frothing
Mouth to feed dead
Bottom-fed in this
Stress-induce cesspool are bred
In an **** of virulent,
Ignorant stench
Still entrenching my senses
In sieges of tension
And drenching my clenching jaws
In reprehension
Spat out in the face
Of this whole human race
But mostly just this
Poor excuse for its waste

Oh how I thrive
In depression
Repression
In stressing each second
I feign this pretension
Anxiety, angst-driven
Dreading the selfless
Reflection
Is merely delusion
Of past intervention
Divine of some being-
Perhaps, beyond seeing
The infinite universe
Into it freeing
The essence of meaning
When all of it ceases
Materializing
Into the time creases
And all realizing
Ideally reprises
Its role as the sole
Individual guises
Unmaking me whole
Again,
Then, I describe it

I stroll superciliously
Down the street
As I smirk at the poor souls
With little to eat
Unconcerned with what burdens
Weigh heavy on shoulders
From peaks up above them
I'm rolling the boulders
And wondering what
It would look like in smolders
If I were to burn
It all down to the ground
And expropriate any remaining
Estates like the Derg
In my own Terror Red
Irrepressible urge
Be the scourge
Be the bane
Of their archaic ways
And with no one left standing
But me, a new reign
Would expand and consume
The survivors in pain
And the world would at last
Know my name
And in vain
Never take it again
Unless I so ordain

Buyer beware
Oh, you're in for a scare
When I tell you your hair
Does not need that much care
That your phone
Doesn't need to cost
More than your home
That those things that you own
And you don't even use
Are as faulty and paltry
As what's on the news
That your new pair of shoes
Is the bare feet of poverty,
Your right to choose
Is some Lot in Life's Lottery
Stocking your shelves
With the Keebler Elve's spells
And stuffing your stockings each year,
Jingle bells
Someone else's expense
Isn't worth your two cents
You dispense it like dreams
Of the white picket fence
While the industry picks at your pockets
Unheeded
Insurances claim extra coverage is needed
To breathe and to read
The fine print on the label
Approved FDA chemical
Farm to table
Just turn a blind eye
To the advertise lies
Inundating your eyes
With disguised dollar signs
Like some supersize fries
Fill you up for five minutes
Then leave you as empty
As when you first bit it
The infinite Amazon
Shopping mall pantheon
Built to the corporate gods
Of Emoticon
Keeping you spending, and clicking,
And liking,
And posting,
And boasting,
But mostly just psyching
You out of reality
Plastic-wrapped packaging
Boxed in a fallacy
Now shipping free
Who they want you to be
Just a product to brand
For the others to see
You consuming it all so
Conspicuously

Of few things am certain
I'm not a good person
I know I will die
And nothing can reverse it
I'm cursed with the passing of time
I don't mind
If a billion and one others
Meet their demise
Before mine
In its lack of fulfilling
Accomplishment
Ferries me off
To the terrors of Tartarus
Martyred by none
I could not liberate
But a single societal
Prison cell fate
Languishing in my own
As I longed to find home
And in so doing entered
Dimensions unknown
To so many untold
Countless souls I don't know
And came out on the other side
Having mine sold

No, I wasn't there suffering
Whip cracks
And axes
Or clashes with fascism's
Poisonous gasses
I didn't pay taxes
Imposed upon masses
Or stash my trash cash
Beneath cardboard box mattresses
Sleeping in heaps
Of the stock market's crashes
I've never known hunger
Or Dust Bowl thirst-glasses
I've never been lower
Than lower class rations

I just cut my losses
My checks, balance bills
And of rights
Mine are human
From birth
To the ****
So I feel
The injustice
Disgust and distrust
Of the ones who still toil
In history's rust
And to those who still spoil
Themselves in its lust
I admonish
Will ever by hammers be crushed

Been a minute
Since I took
Half a second glance
And looked
At what resides in each of us
Beneath the surface feature stuff
Reflecting on the one who I
Became, the same brain stimuli
Still unified in all but form
Perplexing, cogent lightning storm
Projected from my eyes, the sun
To wash away what they had done
And none could cast their shade
In my direction
For I was remade
Rejuvenated in the glade
And stayed this way
As far away
From them I journeyed on astray
And lost all track of time
I lost my mind
Intelligent design
Had redefined my evolution,
Elevation
To divine
And the creation
Making gods of us
Revealed itself
As humankind

Questions warrant answers
But so many seem to be
For me
Directed in my general direction
Just for my attention
To be given over
To a prying pair of eyes
So languid in its little mind
But then in kind
I find an offer
For my curtest of reply
Albeit with an edge
Of temperamental
Sharpening responses wry
I can't deny the food
They share
With me
Without a reason why-
Just some extra questions
I'm more willing to oblige
For with my hunger satiated
My impatience can resign

An acquired taste
No doubt it takes
Some time to wait
Until it seems to make
You crave it
Savor every flavor
Mixed together on the plate
A flat and fluffy,
Full of grainy
Goodness, sourdough pancake
You rip and tear it,
Often share it
Rarely in the gorsha form
But wash your hands before you dare it
Grin and bare this culture norm

Dread the free time
But still can't wait to have it
To seize peace and quiet
By my force of habit
And flee far away
From a central locale
Of a jobless, impoverished
Human garbage pail
Full of wasted potential
Unutilized power
Another kid lost to disease
By the hour
Devoured from inside out,
Parasitic
A malnourished mortality
Fated statistic
Accounting for little more than
A UN
Detrimental development
Index embellishment
IMF, World Bankers swooping in
Heaven-sent
Millions lent
Never spent
Back on the people
Just keep them like sheep
Marching on to the steeple
And reap what they sow
How so little they yield
Until cityscapes swallow up
Forest and field
And behind their most opulent
Optic facades
In their decadence festers
The graces of Gods

What little expected of me
Let's get on with it
Give me some students to teach
How to ponder it
This is just something I do
To keep stalling
My purest intentions
Are truly
Appalling
Obscurest dimensions
Of sanity
Scrawling
Bemusing expressions
At my beck and calling

Surface tension
Wearing thin
Emaciated
Bones in skin
The shock sets in
Upon the sight
Of transformations
Into this
Cadaverous
Dehumanist
Adapting to impractical
Apathy practiced
Tactfully
To physically appear to them
Augmented exoskeleton

Frenetic mess of masses clasping
Medium exchanges passing
Hands are cashing in the yield
I keep my eyes banana-peeled
For ripest, firm, devoid of bruise
Punctiliously, as I choose
What to refuse
What to consume,
What's ready to be
Purchased soon
Averting each
Judgmental gaze
Occasional obscene displays
Of wary to my
Alien
Selections vegetarian
Restricted even further still
By what I can not cook or ****
Just here to fill my plate
With weight
Of yesterday, same thing I ate
And don't expect these habits change
Until my taste buds rearrange
Far from this strange, Muslim bazaar
I feast again like Shah Jafar

It always includes
Ruling classes
And taxes
Sometimes the form differs
The law always passes
Agreed upon by
Select few who renew
Their extravagance through
The consent of the governed
To pay what is due
To the papacy pew
As indulgences, tithes
Coincide with the sins
That accrue
Piled high to the sky
Where the heavens would cry
To know God's blessed children
Live only to die
As they serve the false prophets
Who claim they can fly
And it seems they're content
As to never know why
Such a system relies
On the spreading of lies
Until lo and behold!
No surprise,
Out of time

Used to be king of the world
Unbeknownst to you
Ruler of one
Into all
I was shown the truth
Youth was my edict
The law of the land
I decreed it and freed it
With sword clenched in hand
And commanded the finest
Contingency plan
Prosperous in a gilded age
Advent of man
Common in its exceptional
Privileges granted
For all a most plentiful harvest
Was planted
Supplanted the former theocracy
Waned
And in its wake logic and reason
Then reigned
As supreme as the beings
Extremely would dream
Of utopian unions
To be, I would deem

The difference between us
Is seen as
What keeps us
Divided, united
And trying to hide it
With notions of sameness
Partitioned in races
And paychecks to rub it in
Spite-her-nose faces
Despite whether on
The excesses of luxury
Porcelain thrones
Do we trickle down waste
Upon those without homes
Or we find ourselves
One of the billion
Have nots
Minding only our businesses,
Tending our crops
We depend on it always to be there
To make
Livings off of
These lands,
As their claimants we stake
And it takes us a lifetime
Of filling it with
Any worth we convert
To devaluing it
But in each of us lies
An identical pit
Of despair in disparity's
Wealthy abyss

Keep stalling
On scrawling down
Novel ideas
In my dreams,
Clearly seen
Do the plot-lines appear
To ensnare my subconsciousness
Slumbering phase
To awaken my procrastination
Malaise
Is it laziness
Dazed in a maze
Of my craziness
No
I just know
It will bore me
With lackluster prose
Without rhyme to find reason
To read it back after
I'd lose any inkling of muse
By the chapter
So always it seems to
Revert me to verse
To immerse me instead
In this poetry curse

The liberal dove hawkin'
On parakeets squawkin'
Talk 2 different lingos
Up at the board chalkin'
And still stalkin' pages
Of history's past
Until it's what I'm teachin'
To these kids in class

Seems like something's dying
In here
I can smell it
Could be the two mice that I killed
No regret it
In here there is room
For but one vermin's need
To feed freely on misery
That rat is me

Utterly, absolutely,
Completely alone
Learning how to make
This dimly lit cavern home
Which is seldom if ever
Enough to appease
Electricity greed
In the shadows I breed
So illumined is my
Filthy rodent disease
And so clearly they see
The rat
Is in fact,
Me

Lacking some vital components
Of sustenance
Constantly grouchy and drowsy
Because of it
Body reduced to
Cadaverous, frail
Lazy muscles but hustle
Do I without fail
At the crack of each dawn
In the dewy, brisk chill
Run an hour on empty
And then get my fill
Of the daily bread rations
Potassium passionate
Fruit satisfaction
With just a few spoonfuls
Of protein combined
With this breakfast of champion's
Everyday grind

My acid brain drizzles
And sizzles with riddles
Of trickle down sickles
That tickle my fancy
To take it all
Make it my own
'Till I fall
But exuberant peace-keeping
Missions are all
I desire
My fuel to the fire
Is never tell me
Not to gods to aspire
To be, more than anything
I ever dreamed
Ever schemed
Could be possible, plausible
Fathomably
Comprehensible
Nah! Inconceivably so,
Inexplicable is
Where I let my mind go

Insist on your entitled status
Updates
Then extinguish the Kindle
Of past Tinder dates
Like a dwindling flame
In a deluge of privilege
You claim to bring change
But to it are indifferent
You act like baboons, like buffoons
Like cartoons
And you voice your opinion
With choice auto-tunes
As you swoon for inane
Superficial expression
Emoticon drones
Of real feeling repression
Attention you give
Is a transient cringe
A few seconds of Vines
And a Youtube clip binge
Your maturity, surely, can stand to improve
Think you have all the answers
And rudely conclude
That of vibes and of mood
Only good you exude
But they're not worth their weight
In your Instagram food
For the idols
You idly prattle about
Flaunting others successes
As you are without
Any merits to tout,
Any anthems to shout,
All you stand for is force-fed
To spew from your mouth
Your identity forfeit
To sociopathic
Hack-tactic blackmailers
Still tracking your packages
Facts
Do not phase you
Concerned only with
How many hit like
On your profile pic
And where next you can score
One more hit it and quit it
Admit it, you kids
Just don't know how to live it

Still miss her like crazy
Pretend it don't phase me
But lately I've been
Thinking possibly, maybe
Just maybe
I have to believe it
Put her in the past
For the last time
And mean it
For two years of more
Continentally-drifting
Seems only to further the Great Rift
Of shifting
From living in loverless mountains amidst
What I tell myself
I really need
To exist
Back to shores of more wandering
Sandy-toed steps
In my infinite pondering
Bottomless depths

Life is a flash
Before self-deceit eyes
Promises that we keep
To ourselves, are all lies
We know constantly changing
Is how we evolve
Yet resist it whenever
There's problems to solve
Making more in the process
Of progress to test
Human limits and nature
Beyond what is best
But sometimes I feel like
Only I realize
Through my own pair of so-often
Self-deceit eyes
That attempts to glimpse truth
Behind layers of fallacy
Seldom if ever
Elucidates how to be
No longer searching
For answers to who
Am I? What am I?
What should I do?

The underlings stare
In submissive awestruck
Subjugation in landmine-filled
Landfills, are stuck
In the trenches, the feces
The carcass-strewn muck
Where the vermin-spawn ****
As they're taught how to work
And to fend for themselves
Like the Fall of Dunkirk
As the imminent doomsday device overhead
Incapacitates them
As mere prey to a web
Of a global dominion
Ambition connection
Subconscious hive-mind
Buzzing out the objection
And phobia-spreading
Pandemic misanthropy
Greed in disguise
Subsidizing atrocity
Not for me,

I am
The justified treason
The reason the man-hunters
Close open season
The cease-fire peacekeeper
Proliferation
The water war's rising
Desertification
An MIA runaway
AWOL defector
Still haunting the tombs of detente
Like a spectre
With what I assure
Mutually in the end
When I send go-aheads
On the ICBMs
And avenge the dependent expended
Caught in
This crossfire for-profit
Arms race it has been

I will bathe you in rivers of blood
'Till you see
There is no revolution
Without some of me
Not a page in this history book
Could be turned
Nor its secret society's
Shadows be burned
Without my procreation's
Next unheeded seed
Without my ravenous
Dark desire to breed
To be freed from the civilized man's
Inner-peace
To be summoned from depths
Of his inner-most beast
And set loose upon
Innocent flesh to devour
To sever and rend and smite down
To seize power
Is yours simply if
You succumb to my will
Let me show you
How easy
It can be
To ****

Don't think about her
Nearly as much
As I used to
By now I am used to
The miles away
And the days that roll
Carelessly by
Cannot change
The estrangement I felt
The last time in her presence
As I would draw near
To the end of my sentence
She would without hesitance
Preoccupy
Her pretty little mind
With excuses for why
Her and I
Could not be
Brought together in moments
That felt more like
We

You drown your potential
I swim with the sharks
You get sentimental
I break broken hearts
When you lie to yourself
I'm the serpentine grin
When you count all your wealth
I'm the ghost of Chi Minh
When you fail to confess
I'm the guilt in your chest
Where you see the oppressed
I'm the civil unrest
You regret nothing? Oh, is that so?
Well I do
I lament every moment
And know you do too
You are scared to be what
I release from its cage
Just an unmuzzled mutt
Layin' waste to this page

If I perish five minutes
From now
In some tragedy
Weep not for me
Just pass on
My depravity
Let my insanity spread
To each head
Propagate my disease
Like a plague to be read
And in bold anonymity
Mark my tombstone
Still unknown the identity
Of the Alone

Just know
I found no
Better place left to go
Where I wander eternally
Restless in woe
Is an arid expanse
Where I reap what I sow
And what grows there
Can never quite seem to appease
The fell hunger
Just miles of salted-earth seas
And the breeze is a fiery
Whirlwind of plague
And about me outstretched
Filthy hands as they beg
Seem to stay my own conscience
From dealings with just
And as fairness and equity
Wither to dust
I look forward to dusk
And tread on to the dawn
Of long gone dreams of lush
Verdant pastures and meadows
And forests enchanted
By paradise shadows
For there lying fallow
Beside a soft stream
Is my long-deceased faith
In this nightmarish dream

Why do I venture
Stray so far away
To find what will never be found
Anyway
Is it some exaltation
Of my inner peace
That I seek to have ascertained
Sitting alone at the peak
To escape what is breaching
The bounds of contention
Potential I have so much more
Left to mention
All knowledge eludes me
Despondent subdues me
And through me becomes
Empty vessels of gloomy
Reductive and counter-productive
Constructions
Debased as they slip through
My tenuous clutches
No more can I grasp
The original vision
Is blurred and distorted
By pointless derision
Omissions of what I initially
Dreamt
To make sense of realities
Often exempt
Have I been
From the coffins they form around
My crawling skin
But within this impoverished
Subconscious decay
Do I see now
Why they bow
To their knees
And pray

Starting to dream in the language
But wish
Explanation translations
Were easy as this
Seems to be for me
Writing comes naturally,
Freely it flows
But to them it would be
Something only few know
How to even begin
To interpret my syntax
Relaxing and chatting up
Chewing on chat
And for that taking part
Demands speaking it back
But I lack the right words
To talk to them with tact
And enrich conversations
Of indigent thought
With invaluable bundles
Of muses I brought

Just give me a cause
Something worth fighting for
Something worth living for
Something worth dying for
For I would even settle
For worth trying for
Because none of it
Up to this point
Offered more
Than a daily distraction
To help me looked passed it
Neglect, disregard, and forget
How it happens
To pass before we even realize
It's gone
As it flashes before our sleeping eyes
See the dawn
And how many expire
And fade away lost
Without barely a scratch
On the surface of meaning
Will never cease to make me
Disbelieving
In whether this dreaming
Ephemeral state
Is bestowed upon us
To teach us how to wait
Patiently for salvation
Or flames in the furnace
Of Hell's conflagration
With only two options
Instilled upon birth
AN eternity spent
In some alternate Earth
What is anything worth?
Then again I must ask it
Just to find the answers
Are sealed in a casket

Try to exist
And be one of the people
Pretending I'm equal
In effort I give
Just to live
And keep peaceful
Be calm with the kids
Who intrude into my
Personal introspection
And  pester me with
Their illiterate questions
Incessantly saying my name
Without aim
Without seeking to find
More that I might explain
I just wish they would go
Far away, and refrain
From frustrating me on to no end
In their game

I pose as this person by day
Who admits
To the others, his brothers
No god he submits
To more regal in splendor
More real in its form
More unruly enraged in
Its wrath firestorm
None its equal in might
Of life-giving aflame
The sol only creator
False prophets disclaim
But in vain is my quest
To convince them or dare
For with all of their deities
Mine gladly shares
Its irrefutable
Undisputed dominion
Across the sky realms
Of religious opinion
And sets upon Earth
With its mercy in tow
Reappearing each day
As its progeny grows
To discover the omniscient
Secrets it frequents
In flight, alight bright
Until someday, we reach it

Sorrow is loss
I believe
I can feel it
And any man's hand
Has the will
To reveal it
But that of a creature
Unknown to your kind
Is required to grasp the kind
Of which is mine

What they don't know
Won't hurt them
Not here to desert them
Or try to convert them
Effects that I happen to have
Inadvertent
But certain am I
What these people teach me
Born from not but the dirt
To grow into a tree
In their dormancy sleeps
A compassion for life
But their lot in it sharpened
It into a knife
And a spear tip to stave off
The predators lurking
I'm simply an herbivore
Shepherd observing

Counting the days
Left remaining ingrained in
This muddy, rat-hole, bug-infested,
Duress-filled uneasiness nest
Just to test my depressive
Resolve at its limits
Conflicted with finding the faith
It inhibits
And given two years to make sense
Of surrender
Expendable humans
I serve, a defender
Of peace there in me
Still it yearns to be free
But condemns itself to
Costs of living for free
Finding harmony in
What is simply easy
Understood to me as
One does melancholy

Silly girl
You forget
It was I who consoled you
Alone in the night
In my arms I behold you
Was I who extolled you
The praises I’d write
As if serenades lulled you
To beckon my sleight of right-handed
Commanded
Deceptive, entrancing
Love potions rebranded
In simple semantic
Spell-checking pedantic
Atlantic allusory depths
Of romantic
Void undertow woes
Where we’d sink for forever
As I kept describing us
Perfect together

Even when
I do not
Seem to have you
I do
I step with you in stride
Every day I get through
I contain you inside
My sole essence of being
And restless I think of you
Always as leaving
Me grieving, in search of
The tallest of peaks
To behold of your splendor
It renders me weak
And depleted, worn, weathered
And weary ascending
Still ardently seeking
Your love never-ending

Exhaust myself venturing
Into unknowns
In my bones start to feel
Myself slowly grow old
Still resilient
Resistant
My youth is recalcitrant
As it revolts against
Wasted time I have spent
Brooding, colluding
With vanities decadent
Lusting for power
Remembered by all
For how I rose to seize it
From others’ downfall
Just to plummet as one
Of the outcasts of hubris
Ambition’s abortions
Successes’ refuses
Reclusive within
My hermitic exile
With nothing to gain
Think I’ll sleep for awhile

I wonder like thunder
Storms in the night sky
How it all came to form
Above mountaintops high
How the jungle has lungs
And with each breath it thrives
Teeming life in its infinite
Strive to survive
And as I pass it by
And it passes me by
I think only of what
A sublime place to die
Despite how much I try
To describe my goodbye
And believe there are gods
Who would ever reply
To my doubtful decries
Only to be shown why
I am here, I’m alive!
At least...
Most of the time

What maidens appear in my dreams
Do I fabricate
Faces unseen before dissipate at
An alarming rate
Soon as my eyes open wide
And remind
Me why I
Do no longer see those
Of my past lives’ disguise

Technical issues
Malfunctioning wires
The power sporadically
Comes, then expires
As quick as the rains
In cascades upon town
Serenade me to sleep
As they crash all around
And depart to the chirping
Of crickets in thickets
Of dense foliage
As the canopy glistens
Bejeweled in the dews’
Opalescent sun rays
As the colobus leap
To and fro as they play
On display is a wilderness
Otherworld bliss
And the people as natural
Components subsist
Off the land that has nourished them
Centuries old
Now a part of their story
Mine set to unfold

I feel such a joyless and reckless, unbridled
Despair of some incessant boredom time trial
So much of it placed in my hands to control
And to bend to my will, but I just do not know
What to do with it all, but imagine a place
Where again reunited within her embrace
It would all have been worth it, to flee undeserving
Of her concerns, left to my morbid devices
observing
The rest of its turning
Without her nearby
Until in her resplendence
She sets in the sky

We triumph for those who have known us in glory
And in utter ruin remember the story
Acknowledge our valor, our power to keep
Braving all odds unheeded, march into the deep
Preserving a legacy not quite our own
Be of foes we have bested to reclaim the throne
Or of people we’ve wrested from brinks of despair
Abject in their poverty, dreamless nightmare
As we serve higher causes of righteous assurance
Our quest ever dauntless against the abhorrence
An amoral mass of the impure intent
In our ascent raise them from endless lament
To depart from a world to for years we have been
But as shadows to those of us living in sin
For it is but of ours time itself meets its fate
And begins to devour us all in its gape

No faintest ray of light
Shines in
Or finds it can
Divine a grin
Above my chin
As darkness seeps into my skin
Wherein the fading joy persists
To fein another day amidst
So many glances skeptically
And questioningly scowering me
Or some don’t seem to care I’m here
Don’t meet my eyes, nor dare I there’s
A stranger in some stranger land
And every night the rains again
Crash down upon this muddy shack
Until my dreams all fade to black

Making this place a home
Is no easy feat
When I can’t even make
A hot meal I could eat
And in no earthly form
So desire to learn
How from not but a twig
And a stone
Make it burn
Just expecting to introspectively
Endure
This new prison cell in darkness clutches
Emmured
In insanity shrill shrieking silent serenity
Nothing to make me believe
I deserve to be
Anywhere else but this lush green oasis
Draining the life from this shell it encases
Making the most of the least of my problems
And unto the peoples’
Give myself to solve them