My second reflection  
Appears in the mirror
And suddenly I’ve
Never seen myself
Clearer
Begrudgingly
Sigh
I no longer
Endear her
Can’t cheer her up
Fear
That the ending
Draws nearer
That my complete picture
Omits
The mirage
That the photos
Cut deeper
And scar my visage
And you’ll just see
Deformed
Mutilations
At best
An unlovable beast
From his man suit
Undressed

If I had nothing more
To say
I would’ve written it
Another way
Grown old
And having been
All out of options
Settled down
Ingest the toxins
Of a modern
Lifeless
Strife
Without a sound
And buried down
Forever deeper
What I never
Wanted found
But I am just
An open book
And readers
Cannot help but look
And what it took
To tell my story
Started with
A simple hook
A line and sinker
Master tinker
Overthinking
Critically
And if you lose me by the end
Well then
There’s plenty in the sea

When we finally
Wake up
From the dream
Could it be
This is not the forever
We used to conceive
We are not as together
As like to believe
And when leaving
Is all that
Alleviates
Stress
Is there anything left
But a ruinous mess?
If the sound of my voice
And my presence
Perturb you
And absent
Its resonance
Doesn’t unnerve you
As much as it would
If I was
The one wronged
But still couldn’t undo
Beside you
I’ve belonged

But now everything’s changed,
So much ice
In the veins
In the air
In the room
In the gloom
It contains
Hurting you
Hurting me
Is now all that remains
And we don’t feel the same
As we used to before
When I open the door
It’s like bracing for war
And I see us still trying
To desperately cling
But we keep going back
To the same exact thing
Such irreparable harm
Such appalling disgrace
Can’t erase
The betrayal
Just watch as it breaks
Us down further
In fervor
In heartache
Inveigh
When no terms of endearment
We have left to say

Starting to prefer
Alone
Though
I want you
But before
A mere name
Could be slipping right through
Seldom kissed
I commit
A most faithless
Adrift
And I stared for too long
And I gazed in her eyes
But at night
Only you in the dark
Would I find
Only you
Who reminds
That my longing
My yearning
For dying inside
Cannot weary
Or wayward
My down for the ride
Further still
Have I shown you
The places I hide
When I cannot keep carrying
Days out of sync
Sinking
Crushed
By the weight
Of my ego’s distinct
Inclination
To feel itself
Safe
In the warmth
Of the moments
I am not a wraith
When you look upon me
And I cannot escape
From the hold that you have
Over my last embrace

Am I just
The next transgression
Never learn my lesson
Stressin’
Lonely graves
I must
Unrest in
Empty suits
I look my best in
Can’t befit
My corpse decay
As hollow as
The sky is gray
When half a world away
You flee
And no sunlight
Enlivens me
No sight
Nor taste
Illuminates
No scent
Nor touch
Intoxicates
It all just resonates
Despair
And melancholy
Everywhere

Moments eternalize
There in your eyes
And I crystallize
Memories
Nemeses
Vie
For a seat at the table
A place in the stable
And I am still willing
To gladly
Disable
My sought after
Loveless
Redemption’s
Return
To companionship’s
Rift abyss
Feelings confirmed
In the actions and words
Undeterred
Unreserved
Until my
Hope to die
Guilty sentence is served