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But now everything’s changed,
So much ice
In the veins
In the air
In the room
In the gloom
It contains
Hurting you
Hurting me
Is now all that remains
And we don’t feel the same
As we used to before
When I open the door
It’s like bracing for war
And I see us still trying
To desperately cling
But we keep going back
To the same exact thing
Such irreparable harm
Such appalling disgrace
Can’t erase
The betrayal
Just watch as it breaks
Us down further
In fervor
In heartache
Inveigh
When no terms of endearment
We have left to say
Starting to prefer
Alone
Though
I want you
But before
A mere name
Could be slipping right through
Seldom kissed
I commit
A most faithless
Adrift
And I stared for too long
And I gazed in her eyes
But at night
Only you in the dark
Would I find
Only you
Who reminds
That my longing
My yearning
For dying inside
Cannot weary
Or wayward
My down for the ride
Further still
Have I shown you
The places I hide
When I cannot keep carrying
Days out of sync
Sinking
Crushed
By the weight
Of my ego’s distinct
Inclination
To feel itself
Safe
In the warmth
Of the moments
I am not a wraith
When you look upon me
And I cannot escape
From the hold that you have
Over my last embrace
Am I just
The next transgression
Never learn my lesson
Stressin’
Lonely graves
I must
Unrest in
Empty suits
I look my best in
Can’t befit
My corpse decay
As hollow as
The sky is gray
When half a world away
You flee
And no sunlight
Enlivens me
No sight
Nor taste
Illuminates
No scent
Nor touch
Intoxicates
It all just resonates
Despair
And melancholy
Everywhere
Moments eternalize
There in your eyes
And I crystallize
Memories
Nemeses
Vie
For a seat at the table
A place in the stable
And I am still willing
To gladly
Disable
My sought after
Loveless
Redemption’s
Return
To companionship’s
Rift abyss
Feelings confirmed
In the actions and words
Undeterred
Unreserved
Until my
Hope to die
Guilty sentence is served
Perplexity
Vexing
Confounding as ever
Attraction not only
I see us together
And romance is not
What you think
What you want
Is a love letter
Penned
In illegible font
Undeserved
Underserved
They still need us
To turn
To keep catering
To
The downtrodden
To earn
What a dignified living
No longer affords
And what destitute
Institutes
Leave uninsured
It’s how much I’d miss you
To you I submit to
And none more among
The great many
I serve
More than her
Undeserving
Will I
Ever learn
How it hurts
To be bearing
The weight of betrayed
How to stay
Inclinations
Inflictions
Of pain
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