This dating app
Lack of success
Gets discouraging
Confidence boost
Then reduced
To uncertainty
All of them
Just want to play
Silly games
An inane competition
To power reclaim
But in vain
Even one simple message
Discarded
How could it have been
More appealing
Imparted
The next
Logic step
In conversing equation
I guess I’m just not
Of the sexting persuasion
Nor of this age
Long disengaged
Have I spent
Now this cyclical swipe and like
Does not relent
Just lament
For the genuine love
I have lost
Now I pay for the right
To remember the cost

Take up my perch
And resume
Thoughts of you
Plan ahead
What to say
At our next
Rendezvous
What to play
Listed out
Bits and pieces of songs
All remind me of you
When you can’t come along
And as I gaze upon
The Pacific
I ponder
Just how aimlessly
Without you
Could I wander

Have all these images
Who we’re supposed to be
He and she norms
I romanticize
Hopelessly
Lovelessness graves
I’m contained
In her ghosting me
Spirits and vapors
Erase recollection
And she disconnects
Into astral projection
As digital,
Pivotal
Message subliminals
Steal her attention away,
I’m invisible
Can’t be more tangible
Still though untouched
Like a hand-held device
Is more worthy of trust
Though I’ve clutched her frail digits
And kissed her eclipses
I’m still overshadowed
By sideshow exhibits
And live in this
Freak on a leash
Other world
Where no fakes
Can heartbreak
Such a nothing’s real girl

And maybe I’ll see her
Tomorrow
Get higher
Keep hiding
The side of me
Thinks her a liar
Conspires to mire
In cables and wire
Desires to beckon
My seldom replier
And dire my poverty
Trauma resurfaces
Now she’s ignoring me
Pouring my worthlessness
Pertinent somehow
To what she was saying
Just take it away from me
You?

I’m not praying for
Paying for,
Graven decaying for
Graying in waiting
To fade in your nevermore,
Save to beside you
Still ebb with the tide you
And hungry and tired
Still strive to provide you
The vibes
And the rides
All the planets align
As the words that I choose
To define it arise
As a decomposition
Of nature’s demise
And the role that I play in it
Soon to reprise
God be ******
Glass of sand
Turns to weeping wasteland
And abandoned all hope
Check the pulse
As it dies
For its roots in me
Still yield
The apple of eyes

Becoming a part
Of much larger
Than life
With the gods I grew up with
Commanding the night
And the lights were spasmodically
Slicing it bright
As the crowd coalesced
In an ecstasy
Entropy
Sound waves controlling us,
Moving us
Mentally
Physically flailing,
Unruly expression
We all brought the energized
Sonic aggression
United in movement
In moonlit catharsis
A metal head horde
All adorned in the darkness
Until the last body dropped
Non-stop frenetic
Enlivened
Inspiring
My most poetic

Why does it feel
So romantic to me
If you don’t seem to care
Seem to share
Mutually
I can only write so many poems
Before
I relinquish Lenore
And embrace nevermore
Why implore you
To be more responsive
Or change
If I want that already
It must be too late
For this we stuff to make it
Make sense
Adding up
Want my heart?
It’s yours,
Take it
Just break it enough
To be never forgotten,
Abandoned,
Betrayed
Self-fulfill all your prophecies
I’m here to stay

Have to get better
At weighing my options
For she is just heartache
Corroding in toxins
And though rather sweet
I’m replete with embittered
Resentment relationships’
Withering liver
And whether or not
I convince her to care
This despair should not characterize
Love affair
We were barely there
Sharing
A moment in sync
Before urges consumed us
In I need a drink