I wonder
Who else she can be
Without me
Among others
Her colors
Must variably
Withhold shades
She displays
By my side
Smiles wide
But then sooner or later’s
Like somebody died
And the joy in the room
Is vacuumed into space
And the hope that I had for us
Obliterates
And in case she is out there
Erasing her life
I can merely be glad
That she had a good night

The present tense
You are
She was
My undoing
With you though
The here and now
Feels like renewing
My letters contained in this green little box
Remain sealed
And sequestered
In restlessness locks
And I festered
Transfixed upon
Dissonant clocks
Buncha’ rocks
It all rots
And returns to the dirt
Without worth
After birth
Ever bound to the Aerth

Am I forcing it into
The pieces this way
When away from you
Carry myself so astray
And dismay takes a hold
Of my loneliest soul
As I rope-a-dope
Sleep paralytics
Ice coal
Becomes ashen and smitten
With progress unmade
Like the lovers of Aerth
Are just free-traded
Slaves
And their ego waves
Must satiate the mass graves
Not the one
He beside her
So desperately craves

Patience
Wait
Don’t ruminate
Too long
Worst case
Scenario
Her ghost inside the stereo
Stuck in my head
Nowhere to go
It makes decisions
For me
Whoa
Possessed
Abstract
Still ill-expressed
She resonates
Elates me stressed
For now wherever she may be
In part always controlling me
No rest
But not for wickedness
Her curse was laid upon me
Kissed

Hoping she’s sleeping
Not creeping about  
And in silence I’m keeping with
Demons of doubt
They keep nagging
And bragging
I told you so
Knowing
Before she invaded my heart
Overflowing
In storms of her turbulent
Surge volatility
Scourge of the underworld
Urging virility
Silly me thinking
She loses control
Just misplaces her mind
And embraces the cold

Still insignificant
Couldn’t have mattered
Could never have felt
What I felt for her shattered
Before me
It all falls apart
On a screen
She believes only evil
Intentions could scheme
To misuse and abuse her
But only I lose
Precious time,
Peace of mind,
And her radical muse
When it changes its tune
With extremes in polarity
Doubts it could work
Due to income disparity
Verity all I have tried
To impart
But to her
There is simply
No love in the heart
Is it just an abyss
Fatalist
All alone
As she wanders and squanders
All place to call home

So much to tell you
Suspended in space
From the moment I see you
All pauses in place
I forget what to say
To that look on your face
And embrace that I waited
All day to hit play
Come tomorrow
Replay it
The same exact way
A few texts,
The unrest,
Then I guess I’ll just ask
For however one-sided
I’m with her at last
And can look past the patterns
All scattered and skewed
Inconsistently messaging
I just feel used
But abused, wouldn’t deign
To equate the same pain
For I can’t pin the blame
On these meaningless flings
If I’ve granted the master of puppets
My strings