It's hard to think of what's right now because
I don't really know.
Life seems kind of silly:
Liking girls and feeling pain.
Right now if I could
I would leap outside this window.
And I would fly so far you couldn't see me among the stars.
Later I would say hello
Even if you cannot hear.
I would sit and speak to you
A thousand years would go.
Maybe you would smile
As the time goes past.
You ought to be who you are
No matter what's beyond.

I have something within me
That does not belong.
I have some kind of
Pain that refuses to escape.
I am here and
I am myself.

You are away
And you are a lie.

There were no nights
Greater than when
We kissed.
And things are different
You are miles away
While I wait in darkness

Even pain
Is loving
When you
Feel nothing else

I could speak words to
Convince you to love me
As I would like you to.
But I care too much
To let you be
With a creature
As hideous as me

I had wanted ***
When I found love.
Now I want less
Than what I'm rid of,
But pain escapes
My empty shell.
I lie awake
In a cursed hell
Where numbness endures
And death is life

I do not miss a lover.
I lost a friend