A univeral sence of escape
      Not just my own luxury
     Trapped behind the walls
   Screaming with my silenced voice
       I am okay , I promise
        
       These markings on my body
        mean nothing
       Yet each one has its own
       Significance
       Meaning something to me

       I am sorry
      I am okay, I promise
      I am not okay ,but I guess that doesn't matter to you.
    Because you aren't even there

Painful yet enjoyable
Leave me with a reminder that last night was not a dream and that you won't fade away like the thoughts I had of you.
Bite because **** if that's all there is to it then atleast there is one night that was enjoyable without the wiskey in your glass

On night that matters when you are sober / when I am there and I matter when you are sober
So yes bite ... Until WE are both content

I have found nothing but happiness in the time that I have been away. In the garden of orchids I learnt to scream in color painting pictures in vivid technicolor.

I learnt to laugh with my tongue sticking out much like this orchid, I wasn't always this happy but now... I have found a wave of calm like no other.

I no longer get mad thinking about you instead when your name visits the corners of my mind. I open that tiny door and mellow in the memory thinking
Wow that once made me happy but that once led me to the ocean weeping my sorrows away

Today I think of you with roses in mind except now I removed the thorns, pruned the bush and smelt the sweet fragrance of joy.

P. S I hope you're as happy as I am and if not I hope you find the kind of joy that makes your toes tingle and your face brighter. I hope you learn to laugh again. I always loved that laugh.