Emily

Emily Dec 2013

So New

There's this girl
She's a few years older
Says she's been eyeing me
From a distance
For a while
She's so new
So unexpected
She captivates me with her words
She treats me better than others
She acts as though she's wrapped up in me and only me
Every moment giving me her attention
Literally
I never knew she'd even make time for me
Much less say she's falling in love
Yes, she said it
I'm falling too

Emily Dec 2013

The Christmas Gift

This Christmas
I reflect on the year
God gave me
This year was met with struggle
More than with ease
I sinned
I lied
Sometimes I felt so alone
But I'm reminded today
How I'm never truly alone
God is with me
And he's blessed me
With wonderful friends
And a supportive family
Sometimes along the way
We forget what we have
Christmas reminds us
Of how we're never alone
We were given a gift
Of eternal life
And happiness
That's the gift
That Christmas is about
Merry Christmas
And don't forget
That you're never alone

Emily Dec 2013

Moving On

I may write about you
I may think about you
But it doesn't mean
That I still dream about you
Or that I still want you
I don't even think it means that I love you
These poems
These extra ramblings
Are my way of ridding my spirit of your toxic presence
I'm liberating myself of the constant feeling of rejection
I'm relieving myself of the tremendous feelings of guilt
But most of all
I'm shedding away all of the feelings of unworthiness and ugliness that you caused me to feel
You ripped me in two
These poems get rid of the brokenness
While I attempt to puzzle myself back together
You left me a mess
That's how I know you're not the best
I'm moving on now
And you'll be sorry
Because there will come a time
When you'll really need me

Emily Dec 2013

Right Decision

You don't even seem to be affected
Or seem to care
That we aren't in each other's life anymore
I guess I made the right decision
When I chose to get out when I did
It hurts to love you
It hurts to want you
But it doesn't hurt as much
As you not giving a ****

Emily Dec 2013

My Most Precious Jewel

On a wintery day such as this
All I need is my dog
And it's bliss
I look into her shepherd eyes
And I am simply mesmerized
Filled with loyalty and admiration
Her love is all I need
Never has she acted on me in greed
She knows when I'm sad
Walks towards me when it's bad
Leans on me, letting me know she's there
She understands me even in despair
She licks my hand to say "it's okay"
She gives me comfort in every way
I couldn't imagine waking up
And not having her by my side
It truly was a miracle finding her
She makes perfect my normal life

I wrote this while I cuddled my dog, Jules. The title is a play on words.

© Peyton 2013

Emily Dec 2013

Filthy, Awful

The devil can appear
In the most beautiful form
That was most definitely you
You filthy, awful liar
Any word you ever told me
Has been shot to hell
I hope you know
How much I genuinely regret
Ever giving you
Any ounce of my love

Emily Dec 2013

We'll Always Know

Do you remember
How I dug you out
Of that deep and dark hole
That was your life

Do you recall
How I pulled you out
Of despondency and despair
Made your life worth the living

I treated you like the queen
That I took you to be
And all you did
Was make a fool out of me

I made you better
Happier and stronger
I had only the best intentions
But you were clearly using me

I gave every thing I had
Exhausted every effort
And all I got in return
Was you ignoring and forgetting

I didn't even get a thank you
Even though I saved you
Do you even care
I wish I would've just left you there
To suffer more on your own
But I guess we'll always know
Who the better person is