"So hard to let love go.
You try, and try, but the negative always shows.
Family, and a friend show their concern with a pat on the back,
and a voice crying out. "Don't worry it's going to be all right."
Eventually is like a clock that stopped in time.
Love is a quickly needed emotion, it's branded in the mind.
Will a heart someday come knocking at my door?
Will she have the magic that i patiently wait for?
Memories of my past will always be my present,
but can my  now present become my memories of my future?
Excuse me. Theirs a knock at my door!!

One day these chains will break
One day I'm going to take
One day
at a time.
And one day I will be free
like the raging of the sea
and on that day
I'll surely see
what these chains
have kept from me.

You stir, sheets stick to your skin,
drawn curtains; shake off the spins.
A summit of buttermilk thunderheads
snap the silk threaded ilk from your covered bed;
a flurry of cats and dogs in Elysium,
but you’d even prefer the Devil beat his wife instead.
There’s no clarity in a mare’s tail;
can’t bear to see the day in shades of gray-scale;
exhale the sale from off the same scale.
You’d rather play jail than pay bail so you can pray tell.

And now I’m in the dark with a snare drum background;
hounds drowned barks turn heads, twiddle thumbs, and lack sound.
And a drenched cat just wants the home with the furnace:
the blankets, the treats, the tone; only earnest.
I’m learning.

Daddy are you listening ?
Theres some things i have to say ,
The things i think and pray about
every single day.

I want you to know i remember ,
So clearly that awful fight ,
You told us you were leaving
And drove off into the night .

At 5 it is confusing
To see all this go down ,
It took some getting used to
Not having you around .

Even when we'd visit you
You were never really there,
Another bottle , another line ,
Its not like you cared.

Isnt it odd that at ten years old i was
Tucking a grown man into bed ?
And isnt sad as your daughter ,
I couldnt trust a word you said ?

So how am i suppose to trust man
Who says that he will stay?
You said the exact same thing
And you still walked away.

Understand your actions ,
Have trickled into my life ...
Youre the one who desserted us,
Yet its your loved ones that pay the price.

I am a cigarette to you.

You lit me up,
and I burned slowly,
and you enjoyed my simple highs,
and got dizzy from my insides.

You began to crave me,
addicted to the sensations I gave your mind,
reliant on the comfort I gave you.

But your fingers began to slip,
and I would burn you,
and I had no choice,
I was on fire.

Then I was nothing but a filter,
and you stomped me into the ground.

But in the end, I was killing you all along.

i get really sad
and somewhat heartbroken
when i think of all the things
that i don't know about you
i don't know where you go
or what you do
it may seem weird
that i would want to know
all of the little things
like what you eat
and when you go to bed
and what you do with your day
but i guess that's what love is
i'm interested in everything
that i could possibly know
it ***** that most of you
is kept so private
i would share anything with you
i guess you have to protect yourself
but i'll tell you right now
i'm not dangerous
and i love you enough
to where i would never
want to harm you
or use anything against you
no matter what
i wouldn't dare think of it
i just want to know you
thick and thin
through and through
i feel like i'm shown one person
and the rest of the world
the real world
is shown something else
i want to experience who you truly are
not just some part of you
or some held off
piece of you
i want all of you
i want to know everything you think
everything you say
and everything you do
i want you
one hundred percent
i want to know all the secrets
that you don't share with anyone else
i want to know all the different parts of you
the dark ones and deep ones
that only come out at night
the light and funny ones
that come out on a good day
the hard working and dedicated ones
that come out when you are focused
i want to see it all
because i love you
and to think i don't know all there is to know
rips me in two