SHARP
                                  JAGGED
               EDGES                    SLICE
       BLEED             BURN

I FEEL NO PAIN,
        ITS NOT ME BLEEDING
ITS YOU

                 i cant reach you
i can only wait
                    hope
                      worry

                                  talk to me?
                     let me help
                                    i'll clean up
                              the mess

     i'll be whole
while you're        broken

                    YOU'RE SHATTERED
                                BROKEN
                                  GLASS
                  
                                                                     *"let me help?"

craving something
                     i cant find it
         yet i know
i need it

please help me
   discover it                 recover it
                       locate it

withdrawals
                         **** people
         i'm not a smoker
      or                     drug addict
        
yet this ache
                burns            freezes
   numbs
i've forgotten

what its like
                        to not
        feel this way
                            hurting without pain

i wish to burrow into your velvet skin

deep down past the harsh coldness

into the veins leading a clear pathway

past the protecting ribs

around your sturdy collarbone

directing me to your heart

where warmth resides

as a permanent member

my heart is a glass of water
sometimes its boiling over
other times it expands and cracks
and it freezes me from the

i n s i d e   o u t

if i'm feeling confident
that you will look after
my heart
i will pour it out, a
   t
    r
      i
       c
        k
          l
           e
to begin with
then as it falls
faster and faster

you   c a t c h   it

with a strainer
instead of your own
glass heart

my love continues to flow
unsure of its destiny
and away from

y o u

i desire to relive
all our times together
g o o d   and   b a d
your splendor overwhelms me
my heart aches at the times
when you don’t regard me
or don’t see the subtle moves
of me trying to get nearer
sneakily brushing your arm
when it was easily avoided
these artfully planed gestures
filled with   l o v e   and   w a n t i n g
go unnoticed sometimes
my world breaks open
to let me fall in the gaps
where darkness resides

though there are better times
occasional times where
you
s
  e
    e
me
all of me
my gestures
my glances at you
times my
h e a r t   f i l l s
when a silent smile is shared
a meeting of our eyes
glint in your eye for me
my favorite is when
every time your warm body
t o u c h e s    m i n e
in an innocent touch
my entire being
wakes up
comes
a l i v e
i see the world
utterly wonderful
with you at its center

love is a two way mechanism.
it needs to be rebounded to work.
without the rebound, it changes.
becomes self hate, loathing, hurt.
the thing that makes it two way.
it needs to be given to be received.
if you give all your love away.
packages covered with bright paper.
then there is none left for you.
your love is required to be given back.
with the force that you gave to them.
this is why one sided love fails to work.
with no one to ricochet it back to you.
stronger than they received.
your love disappears, flies away.
you fall down into darkness.
and keep falling.
down deeper.
down darker.
down colder.
you hope that you’ll find light.
someday you will, hopefully.
you’ll find someone who is able.
strong and perfect for you.
the right things in the right person.
who will hand you back presents.
packages of love thought long lost.
given with a smile and bow on top.
wrapped with a return address.
only for the one who gave it.
to be returned some day.
when you find the light.
your love.