I went up to the counter again and the man in the red tie smiled.
“Another refill?”
Uh…yeah…yeah, another refill.

Why hasn’t that bus come?

“9 Sugars and 2 creams, right?”
Yes, uh what time is it?
“10:21”

Why isn’t the bus here yet?

I’ll take another burger. No onions extra pickles.
NO ONIONS Please.
Thank you.
What time is it?
“10:25”

Where is that bus?
It still isn’t here.

“Hello again.” Another coffee
I place the change on the counter.

There goes the dirt from my hands again.

I’m sorry, let me clean that up.
I wipe it off and more flakes come off.

“Sir, would you like another refill?”
Yes, I would. 9 sugars no cream this time.
Oh, and another burger make sure NO ONIONS.

Can you give me the time?
“It is 10:40”

I think I missed it. What day is it?
It hasn’t passed by for a while now.

Excuse me, sir.
Can you spare some change it is Christmas you know?

I’ll have a tea and another coffee.
“Refill sir?” Yes, just black.
“It’s 10:50 just so you know.”
They’re about to close. Where is that bus? Do they run today?!

God. How am I still not okay?

God. It's been so long.

God. I'm so tired of life right now.

God. What happened to me?

I was such a nice kid.
I was calm all the time.
Mature for my age,
Little but so lively.

I was so helpful.
So loyal.
I always supported my trust.
But I never really spoke my mind.

I was shy.
I was small.
I never stood up for my feelings
I never stood up for myself.

And now I'm older.
I realize I don't need support.
I need myself.
I need confidence.

Speaking your mind is not wrong.
Standing up for your feelings isn't rude.
Standing up for yourself isn't mean.
Saying what you feel doesn't make you imperfect.

No one's perfect. Not even them.
The ones you hate for being so amazing.
Maybe she has anxiety.
Maybe his mom is alcoholic.

No one has a perfect life.
There's not one perfect family in the world.
There is not a person in the world who's perfect.
There's not a person who doesn't have one bit of strife.

But just because you aren't perfect.
Doesn't make you less worth it.
You're amazing.
You're still charming, kind, and strong.

You're just more experienced.
You just understand some more things now.

And maybe, just maybe,
You just aren't as shy anymore.