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10:27 Post Meridiem
Eastern Standard Time,
Thursday December 21
Location: 2 Highland Manor Drive
Schwenksville, Pennsylvania
40.2562° N, 75.4638° W
Sunrise time: 7:31 am↑(121°)
Sunset time: 4:46 pm ↑(239°)
Day length: 9:14:42.

Mine circadian rhythm pulsates bright
imperceptible increments of daylight
increase fantasy fanciful heavenly flight
as I imagine myself
Icarus fearlessly gaining height
blindly heading into sunbeam light
strongly advised courtesy experts to travel

toward nearest star at night,
nevertheless unbeknownst plight
awaits me should foolhardiness
skew sense and sensibility right
off kilter yours truly blithely soars
reins of waxed wings held tight.

Plus I, a garden variety generic guy
aging long haired pencil neck geek
who presently wonders why,
rare astronomical phenomena
hashtagged great conjunction 2020 doth defy
illusory phenomena whereby,

two largest planets of solar system
about 1095 five days ago
Jupiter and Saturn separated in the sky
amateur astronomer seen
courtesy visible/ naked eye
6 arcminutes at their closest point,
which was the closest separation
between the two planets since 1623.

Inhabitants upon solar systems far and wide
will find Earthlings and aliens alike
their curiosity well supplied
out of world event
sponsored courtesy monopolists.

American Family Insurance
chose home renovation
duo Drew and Jonathan Scott
aka Property Brothers sweat equity
find fixer-uppers and transform them
into dream homes
use state-of-the-art imagery programs
to unveil their plans for how
properties will look after transformation,
but potential home buyers
have to take risk
to make the twins' vision come true,
and it's up to Jonathan and Drew
to convince the couples  
purchasing an older home
in need of work is best option.
hashtagged introvertedness trademark
silently exorcised, ostracized, and vilified
Impossible mission to resuscitate...
a forsaken promising
(even short lived) friendship
regardless of expressed gender
exhibited by other persons from yesteryear.

When trying to jump/kick start
lapsed meaningful interpersonal connections
from much earlier in my life
absence of a spark to kindle
once upon a time
valuable linkedin treasured bond
bereft of dynamism.

Folly entertained courtesy yours truly
bafflingly, desperately, and futilely
grasped elusive chimera
sabotaging rare occasion,
when fate smiled benignly,
I botched, ******, forfeited...
overarching golden opportunity
to experience sustained
positive rapport with compatible
lass or lad to accompany me
thru travails or buzzfeeding
a "lost" boy
with words of encouragement.

Now as an emotionally freighted
Unitarian, sexagenarian,
nonestablishmentarian, omnivore
psychologically perturbed,
rankled, tortured, vexed
bully me I got
repeatedly severely traumatized
similarly hectored by parents
issuing threatening ultimatums
no surprise I surrendered
to proclivity when showered
with affection courtesy

consensual ****** intimacy
(minus the use of birth control)
eventually married the gal,
whose child I helped beget these last
twenty seven and a half years
to a woman, (who after numerous
illicit marital transgressions)
forgave her leftist
write minded husband,
regarding his lascivious, promiscuous,  
and salacious engagements
though would not tolerate

(understandably, necessarily, logically)
even platonic female relationships,
nevertheless does unconditionally
accept him mental health issues,
and all told comprise
obsessive compulsive behavior,
anxiety/panic attacks
palmar hyperhidrosis,
considerably alleviated courtesy
nine prescription medications
Aetna Medicare Advantra
picks up the tab without any co-pay.

I cannot help but wince
with twenty twenty hindsight smarts,
nurse misgivings and hanker with
shutterflying, recurring, plaguing melancholy
where passivity punctuated
the first two decades of mein kampf.
110 · Mar 2020
Unable to bid papa goodbye
Nonagenarian father afflicted,
his body electric awry
with congenital heart failure,
before long twill bid existence bye
whose physical well being -
corporeal essence inevitably will die

unavoidable manifest destiny...
accompanied into afterlife courtesy death
envision caricature immortal grim reaper
moost ofttimes (normally leering)
brandishing trademark scythe,
impossible mission to skirt dark shadow

creeping closer along edge of night, not shy,
eclipsing former robust native son Brooklyn
once upon time aforementioned sturdy strong guy
metamorphosed gallantly,
gangly, and gawky youth
courtesy blood, sweat and tears

conditioned into muscular trim physique
with equal fervor did apply
figurative nose to grindstone, and well nigh
academically succeeded (think flying colors)
attending City College (back then free - no lie)

deservedly acquiring mechanical engineering degree
furthering advanced studies at Columbia University
General Electric career employee
opting early retirement at age sixty
subsequently clocking thirty plus orbits around sun,
a widower past fifteen plus years, he
steadfastly remained married approximately

half century, and twas... understandably
grievously, honestly, and inconsolably sad
when terminal illness stole key
once dirt poor wife i.e. bride (never bartered)
who bore him three offspring - me
including an older and younger sister
acutely aware I (nsync with siblings)

may learn (ex post facto), our father
though art(fully) adept with smarts already told
tragically could succumb (think demise - see
above) regarding pandemic
indiscriminately claiming thee
storied Zayda as linkedin with progeny

thyself begat (deux) from yours truly,
and biological kith brought forth
their precious kin, whose limp body
born aloft without survivors
without filial piety
bequeathed as Boyce Brandon Harris'
soul into realm of dead souls eternity.
Minimally impacts mine secluded lifestyle,
cuz yours truly came into this madcap world
approximately 534714.57958 times after
gnomon cast shadow across flat plate of sundial
ever since being a little boy, I throve while
existence kept me in solitude, thus isolation trial

directly linkedin with pandemic necessitates
sparse human contact, yea analogous to an exile
punishment far removed, quarantined, condemned...
and essentially metaphorically banished necessitating
befriending self as best beastie boy bad company
where madding crowd hashtagged insync existing

within territory hostile currying aversion to socialize
worse fate than being eaten
alive (with one chomp) savored
by token smiling crocodile
absentmindedly pitching
head over heels into... state of denial

after out running a tribe
of 10,000 aboriginal maniacs,
hence out distancing latter only to buzzfeed former
whose absence not noticed, until long in the tooth
(actually between 60 and 72 teeth) said reptile
captured and subsequently dissected (I'll)
spare telling thee gory details

though amazingly well preserved ****** profile
comprising fully intact features
exhibiting me eternally frozen cunning guile,
nevertheless greater excitement arose
at similarity between former poetaster
and La Brea Tar Pits fossilized dinosaur kin
especially their respective coat
of armor ironic steely iambic style.
110 · Jan 2021
New year's day 2021
Disinclination regarding tradition
to make resolutions stance
adopted courtesy yours truly.
Though such proclamation
may smack of high treason
no matter convenience to season
and ideal time to leaven existence,
I discern no rhyme nor reason
to make a promise unable to keep
whereby only disappointment I reap
inducing tears whether awake or asleep,
thus Matthew Scott Harris utters nary a peep.
as he doth vigilantly creep along  
the information superhighway
hooping to sow (sew) what he didst reap
re:pair so I can strut (wool ewe bull eve)
like a Mummer wannabe counting sheep  
while he does sleep.
E'er since Pope Gregory XIII effectively
(furnished, generated, and
instituted his holy mojo) introducing Gregorian calendar approximately four hundred
thirty nine years ago chroniclers of time - mostly
religious Norwegian farming bachelors
casually referred to brethren as bro
******* (sometimes premature) invocations,
which echoed across
Lake Wobegon, said incantations
devout followers among populace
did likewise parrot and crow
generation after generation
whereupon enigmatic, dogmatic, charismatic
monk native to Burma
stoked one after another ego
artificial construct did ebb and flow
amazingly enough maintaining accuracy
with marginal probability of error
precision parsing seconds, minutes, hours...
would only tolerate absolute zero
variation regarding prediction
of weeks, months, years...
as sophistication of civilization did grow
allowing, enabling, and providing
jolly fellow bellowing **... **... **
could make his round the world wide web
timely trek linkedin with timepiece
assembled with B Corporation approval.
certification of "social and
environmental performance"
a private certification of for-profit companies,
distinct from legal designation
as Benefit corporation.
The above plug an unsolicited commentary
regarding San Francisco, California
based eco friendly and
socially conscious company
and recent employer of eldest daughter,
an engineering University of Pennsylvania alumna.
Unbeknownst to this unsuspecting witty mortal,
a reverberation attributed to butterfly effect
linkedin to hotmail twittering Facebook member,
who resides within Bhutan, his dignified volition
accorded me magnanimity titled sage without any

influential collusion from Russians bestowed yours
truly with said honorably distinguished appellation,
which humility of mine humbly accepted without a
protestation, though never would I brazenly adopt
spiritual holiness, yet flattered to share such rare

pronouncements, when unsolicited feedback lobbed
in my direction (way before advent of Information
Technology Revolution) often tendered, kindled, and
belittled this gentle human, sans when bullies slung
byte ting bit torrent loathsome scandalous red zingers

targeting personal vulnerabilities, asper being under
socially withdrawn, painfully shy, plagued with speech
impediment (severe nasality) caused by submucous
cleft client, plus weighing where needle budged from
absolute zero pounds, topped with passive demeanor

susceptibilities conveniently converging to establish
this bruised Earthling ideal choice as scapegoat, no
kidding with dread to endure endless days, weeks,
months...a lifetime channel of opprobrious, noxious,
malicious emotionally demonic, cannibalistic, barbaric

abominable, damnable, horrible diatribes chipping
(dale lee) at what measly self confidence shielded
fragile psyche fast crumbling into grist for hungry
caterpillar, unbeknownst that flight path randomly

followed by a representative of Lepidoptera order,
would ineluctably set very subtly infinitesimal
fluctuations within air (currently supplying biota
with requisite oxygen), also training perturbation.

Patience Young Grasshopper mine alter ego spoke
when yours truly figuratively chomping at the bit
more accurately fretting with anxiousness when
boyhood body of mine underwent metamorphosis
impossible mission to thwart biological transformation.
Thee nonpareil Amelie Beth Harris-McGeehan
blessed honest to dog goodness her person doth bring
never could her brother wish upon NON GMO
(archaeopteryx, buffalo, chicken...) wing,
and genuine prayer anybody more a maze zing.

Many countless years before
our dear mother passed away four
plus eleven earth orbitz ago,
she voluntarily repeated more
times than I can remember "your
older sister possesses altruistic qualities."

The above words enclosed by this bloke
with double quotation marks, okey-doke
not necessarily the way mama spoke,
but yours truly took poetic liberty

without any intention generating impulse to choke
the harmless, nameless, and stateless writer
and literally went bonkers
while going for Baroque
for recognized virtue that recently woke.

Kinship towards angelic, fantastic, pacific anchor
understandable why her spouse did hanker
during their courtship to pledge his troth
to maneuver metaphorical
hook, line, and sinker as though steadying a tanker.

Innocence and naïveté suffused little boy
occupying body of aging long haired
pencil necked geek without gainful employ
and (and as a shy person without benefit
of powdered milk biscuits)
generally trended solitary
verses masing with hoi polloi,

nevertheless ofttimes relentlessly teased
bully me, I loathed treatment on par
with worthlessness linkedin with discarded toy,
thus gratitude prevails toward eldest sibling
(no matter just thirteen plus months older)
pseudo motherhood she did deploy
to ward off aggressive monsters.

I reckon eyes appreciation
matured into present thankful attitude,
now with mooch time to ponder and brood
how earlier in my life behavior childish and crude
methought meself as hotshot dude,

yet these days, I couch sincerity writing
one or another poetic endeavor
knitting words analogous to composing an etude
contemplative, intuitive, and ruminative mental food

for thought hoop ping to convey
honest to goodness gratitude
communicating reasonable rhyming message
(if yee be downcast dearly beloved sister)
delivering uplifting, kickstarting exalting mood.
initially crafted June twenty fifth
two thousand twenty four
affecting me to utter "oy a broch"
(pronounced ah-BROOKH)
before I cast accursed blatant spells
outright upon the head of mountebank,
whose shrewd and cunning deception
bled me dry as a sun bleached bone,
whereby self denigration and imploration
regarding immediate obliteration
of "nest egg" found me hurling vituperation
against the scoundrel,
whose art of the ruse playbook
scored psychological hit
pitching finances into dire straits
upon writer of these words,
whose monetary situation
never recovered from falling prey
hook, line and sinker,
nor taking pause to question
blindly abiding to the gentle
verbal faux ministrations
courtesy stealth employed
to ****** away meager wealth.

Existential nihilism rent psyche asunder
courtesy unforeseen deadly bombs
lobbed by computer hacker and scammer
rolled into one nasty,
short and brutish lout,
whereby his aggrieved targeted victim,
whereby the perpetrator
experienced absolutely zero qualms
gingerly blindsiding me
analogous to jilted lovers
subjected to figurative
blackened barbs à la rom·coms.

Though common horse sense
I generally applaud
within these lovely bones
an undersize fellow whose forehead broad
methinks perchance twenty first century
can witness remake of Exosquad
linkedin with mental, physical,
and spiritual fiasco fraud
no doubt grist for the cinematic mill
made for movie of the week,
where prominent product placement
of once iconic iPod,
but illustrious position
in Apple's product lineup
came to an end.

Apple finally killed the “iPod” brand,
just over twenty years
since original introduction in 2001
creating perfectly fitting
pièce de résistance jigsawed
replaced by smartphones,
such as the iPhone,
which can both store music
and access music streaming services
such as Spotify and Apple Music.

Nevertheless, and despite efforts
to exorcise mailer daemons
rage against the machine
that doth mauraud,
while a tempest blows
furious in my mind as well outside,
thus I gladly nod
acknowledgement toward Mother Nature
for natural timely spatial effects
bending boughs analogous to quad
of cheerleaders executing tricks
while accompanying color guards
exhibit purposeful antics done roughshod
for the benefit of mister Kite.

Distraction writing reasonable rhyme
temporarily offsets carbon footprint
to stomp furiously on account of cyber crime
wracking noggin how I could be lame
easily being conned, dogged,
goaded, hectored, kick/jump started, ...
now yours truly haint gotta dime
to his name, attributed to fool hardiness
poached, fried, embezzled...
oh that human slime
letting him manipulate me
as if he pointed gun -
which spelled "BANG"
when fired, now triggers
approximately twenty one months later
profound unnecessary anguish.
Viral microbes didst relish
meaty morsel feast
hyperbole (included greased
for dramatic effect) ceased
not, but linkedin

constituent facets increased
with right wing conspiracy
of mine physical health least
up to par today found me writhing,
asper like a wounded beast.

I feel as if giant size
(yes...with closed eyes try to see)
nasty bugaboos did invade me,
and shrunk down yours truly prithee,

(this from gorging on one not so heavy
corporeal doddering entity) si,
whose light humors opposite of glee,
thus envision this bard, granting himself
woolworth truevalue as a flea

to continue poetic tale
(agonizing sham “FAKE” rocked Leprechaun)
on microscopic scale
essentially, a myopic seek reacher
relative of Spongebob, the latter hale

ling from Bikini Bottom,
whose absence aye still bewail,
especially his misfortune sail
ling from toilet bowl
into water treatment plant
leaving sopping wet trail

of eyes rubbed red,
which sadness happens to this male,
when he experiences
invisible nine inch nail
piercing vital organs
with no energy to wail.

Mind boggling to this scribe
how itty bitty organisms can imbibe
every last drop of vitality, describe
epidemic, which if blithely ignored

more virulent parasites could
affect the entire human tribe
fallout nearly as complete
approximately bajillion years ago,
an unimaginable feat

asteroids crashed Earth
generating temperatures
greater than Miami heat
surface with scarring and beat
meteoric plowed shares into swords
whereby predominant species

huge lumbering beasts uttered holy sheet
or a similar facsimile thereof
similar to poet reduced to (of course)
NON GMO gluten free shredded wheat
resembling chopped liver
after trampled by Little Feet!
(Sanatoga, Pennsylvania location)

I luxuriated as inkling of spring 2021
offered sneak preview today
March third as temperatures
reached low fifties Fahrenheit.

Yours truly began reading
one paperback book
(I purchased three),
and absorbed daily dose of Vitamin D
while secretly ensconced
within favorite nook.

This middle aged rue stirring ******
favors warmth, boot haint no stranger to cold,
when dark hen stormy wintry days
eggs hit from Arctic portal enfold
ding Atlantic Seaboard
in a blizzard of bitterly, blindingly, and
brutally sub zero temperatures
from an occasional nor'easter
fiercely gripping hold,

the majority years, sans this prolific
recalcitrant scrivener lived
in various and sundry abode
housed within Southeastern
Montgomery County, Pennsylvania
with 19473 current zip code,
and during my boyhood recall,

how massive ice sheets did erode
the (then) opened expansive farmland,
in preparation for planting time,
where runnels of frigid water flowed
with childish cheeks exposed to glowed
after hours upon
many a green acre got tilled and hoed

despite feeling energized and refreshed
with arms and legs ne'er frozen
aye didst eagerly await with exuberant yen
kickstarting thy body electric
experiencing hearthstone nook
designed and built by Christopher Wren
after heading indoors counting fingers
and toes to make sure, I still got ten

soon hearing the chorus of fauna,
and floral kaleidoscope of color
aground or taking wing
thus, upon thawing out thoughts
drifted toward approaching spring,
the season revitalizing
dormant natural inhabitants,

whose excitement (like mine) didst ping
announcing the debut of fecundity
nsync with screeching
from the lizard king
who entered and did break on thru
doors of fame and fortune  
becoming out of this world legendary
rock and roll icon,
nevertheless, he joined twenty seven club
for permanent fling.
Began during wee hours
of December first
tooth house sand nineteen
steeply self immersed

within insomnia, hence
sudden creative cloud burst
fingers slower than
fleeting thoughts, I cursed
nonetheless stitched,

doctored and nursed
the following continued
hours later with pursed
lips seriously, silently, and soundly

trying to craft lame poem, the worst
among feeble efforts,
among countless attempts
showcasing, (no rhyme nor reason)
yours truly versed.

Found muss elf unable to easily doze
haint no lamentable hallucination
found me froze
imagination begets, births and
breeds nightmare, whereby

humongous cannibal grows
name of Hannibal finally
an end to existential woes,
cuz every academic endeavor
yielded nothing but zeros.

Loathe blatantly outright
to turn toward life of crime,
yet I realize benefits
such as flextime
plus one functions
as independent consultant

off hours studying sign
language to pantomime
in the event victim
of unfortunate circumstances
deaf mute, or simply to
enhance gig being sublime.

Quite aware impossible
mission to succeed,
in the capacity writer,
hence quick income accrued
cash on demand guaranteed
apprenticeship provided with

on the job training indeed
course donned incognito
trumpeting, essentially greed
aware potential billionaires
minted he/she doth only need

venture capitalist to recognize
lucrative opportunity keyed
nsync with song that tops
the charts invariably lead
singer plus natural born
prodigy polymath, prolifically breed
ding all Forbes thirty under thirty

helping to buzzfeed
one after another cottage industry
flourishing analogous
to hardy ***** ****
allowing, enabling, and
providing ample time to read...
tea leaves predicting prodigious fortunes.
to genus and species of **** sapiens,
(who trod across oblate spheroid
since time immemorial
as well as other simians -
classed as naked apes -
and now I enclose a bit of esoteric trivia,
whereby chimpanzee and the bonobo
our closest living relatives
share a surprisingly high percentage
of their DNA with humans,
estimated to be around 98.7-98.8%)
seek a significant counterpart
sought among their respective members,
(whether of the same or opposite gender),
in my case heterosexual partner preferred
within the human league
and of late acceded to friend requests
on Facebook messenger,
one of many social media platforms
to curry potential platonic friendships
between myself, a married, Caucasian
a lapsed Malthusian, nonestablishmentarian,
and Unitarian heterosexual,
who enjoys intelligent conversation
parrying and thrusting with wit and wisdom

Though a solitudinarian, a flickering
pulse of primal atavistic call of the wild
snakes thru the reptilian brain of mine
buzzfeeding erogenous zones
snapchatting across axons and neurons
inducing randiness to shutterfly and twitter
arousing the trouser snake to slither and slide
getting ready to pounce and make an ambush,
where Tiny Tim tiptoes thru the tulips.

Concupiscence at this stage in the game of life
(heading into my sixty seventh journey
around the sun January thirteenth,
nineteen hundred and twenty six)
nipped in the bud courtesy
(side effects) one or more
of the following nine
prescription medications
(to temper anxiety, dysthymia,
obsessive compulsive,
and palmar hyperhidrosis)
ingested on a daily basis:
BUSPIRONE TAB 15 MG 2X DAILY,
CLOMIPRAMINE CAP 50 MG 1X NIGHTLY,
CLONAZEPAM TAB 0.5 MG 1X NIGHTLY,
FLUOXETINE CAP 80 MG 1X NIGHTLY,
GLYCOPYRROLATE TAB 2 MG 4X DAILY,
PRAZOSIN HCL CAP 1 MG 1X NIGHTLY,
PRAZOSIN HCL CAP 5 MG 1X NIGHTLY,
RISPERIDONE TAB 1 MG 1X NIGHTLY,
ROPINIROLE TAB 2MG 1X NIGHTLY.

Back in the day
when the onset of hormonal secretion
analogous to a raging torrent,
an ******* occurred
at the most inopportune times
namely when I needed
(actually volunteered)
to stand up in front of the classroom
expatiating in a profoundly nasal voice
(courtesy submucous cleft palate -
essentially a split uvula)
or gingerly exiting the classroom,
especially upon getting excited
espying a girl I felt infatuated toward,
thus carried books
and school supplies
to hide any self evident
warm prickling sensations.
Aghast at juvenile predilections of mine,
I let ****** fantasies run rampant
(texting and sexting females
young enough to be my daughter)
despite being legally bound and linkedin
to a marital covenant
obliging me to forswear
unrequited love when
at the prime of my life,
yet ******* clad photographs
of young fecund women
(a fraction of my
threescore and six years)
overpower sense and sensibility
without pride and prejudice
knowing at heart
such endeavors to foster
discreet liaison with fecund females
on par with a fool's errand.
otherwise wordily titled: pooped out
after pouring bucketfuls of water into
place of ablutions
all the while skipping to my loo
umpteen times courtesy bathtub faucet
turned toward hot temperature
so toilet would finally,
magnificently, and royally flush.

As ofttimes occurred in the past
anonymous reader's time
I once again promise to waste
concerning asinine verbiage
without this bard **** feeling shamefaced
broadcasting his fealty
to posterior predilections must appear
(as rearing to volley rebuttal
against fans of mine) yours truly
ofttimes discusses that byproduct,
which issues out buttucks) narrow-based
if not downright banal, gross, offal... in haste
to craft something more philosophical
how craven ***** talk
whereby theme doth self debase.

I excreted a bowel movement
earlier today June 5th, 2022
substantial enough to sink battleship
(maybe ye experienced tsunami after effects)
laboriously dumping bucketfuls of hot water
insync with applying plunger found me a drip
with perspiration, and would have possibly found
site manager and/or maintenance man to flip
(a rare sight to behold
worth inconvenience of clogged toilet bowl),
which yours truly felt strain in back muscles
as he poured bucketfuls of water from his hip
accidentally splashing water
on bathroom floor

yes your honor
(necessitating **** deck to evacuate)
if thee choose to sit in judgeship
but please be mindful
to restrain giving me any lip
cuz atypical dilemma I figuratively did nip
in the bud, yet foresee similar outcome
sure as this...
once upon a sage, rosemary and parsnip
herbaceous generic fellow sought readership
ideally landing webbed wide world trip
heralded all along as a V.I.P.
where fanfare for this common man
would find his doggerel
induced listeners to yip.
Predicated on his paying obese sense
to Ronald McDonald patron saint
buzzfeeding his pie hole
courtesy "two Big Macs, Fillet-O-Fish
and a chocolate malted,"
he hungrily nabbed the ⁦Tuesday,
November 5, 2024⁩ election
ofttimes series of unfortunate events
found him holed up
in his Mar-a-Lago Donjon club.

After demise of western civilization
linkedin to implementation of Project 2025
courtesy the forty seventh president
of these currently fragmented United States,
left a legacy that rivaled
the fall of the Roman Empire.

Nary a trace of North American grandeur
discerned amidst the bombed out
rubble strewn landscape
after the second Civil War,
triggered global mortal kombat,
which far eclipsed
the first and second world wars
in death and destruction
(courtesy Beatle browed
foo fighting, gun toting rebel rousers,
who fomented revolution)
rent asunder many a complex edifice
symbolizing once cherished
life, liberty and pursuit of happiness.

Feeble hot pockets of resistance
constituting battle weary
tried and true troopers for democracy
outmatched by phalanx
of heavily armed local militia.

No matter wickedly wrought shenanigans
essentially widely accessible
Artificial Intelligence tools
allowed, enabled, and provided users
to synthesize audio in anyone’s voice,
generated photo-realistic images of anybody
doing nearly anything, and power
social media bot accounts
with near human-level conversational abilities —
and rendered on a vast scale and with a reduced
or negligible investment of money and time.

Due to the popularization of chatbots
and the search engines
they quickly became absorbed into,
also disallowed, disabled the first election season
in which large numbers of voters
routinely consumed information
that is not just curated
by Artificial Intelligence
but produced by Artificial Intelligence.

Blatantly unconcerned
about the populace at large,
nor any promises made
while he angrily stormed
across the country
stumping as dictator of the free world
after riling the madding crowds
enthusiastically populating campaign trail,
most of his waking hours spent
schmoozing with other de facto
autocrats while divvying up the *****
of annexed, subjected vassal states,
(a vast swath of territory
mainly comprising the former Soviet
breakaway Baltic states,
and about a dozen republics
under the sway of Russia),
violently yanked back in the fold
of Vladimir Vladimirovich Putin.

Within this brave new webbed, wide world
each man, woman and child
needs to fend for him/herself,
and those people flush
with ample disposable income
will pay (thru the nose,
hence the bigger the schnoz the better)
for security details unless he/she
presents an intimidating mean mien,
possesses black belt
with at least one martial arts,
or a powerful lucky charm
to ward off threatening hooligans.

Essentially lawlessness will run amuck
imagined in one guise as
the phantom of the opera nemesis
multi pronged ferocious buck
accompanied by an outsize
chicken legged stricken man,
who doth bawk and cluck
also enlisting cannibalistic
commander in chief wannabe
tricked out as Donald Duck.

Even prior to any political fracas,
I decry being dependent
(and at the mercy)
to purchase commodities
within consumerist society hierarchy,
yet envy people who live off the grid
fostering an ecologically friendly lifestyle,
versus being linkedin to Market capitalism
(an economic system where private individuals
and corporations own the means of production,

and the government has a limited role)
yet yours truly never aggressively learned how
to become self sufficient ala **** Proenneke
(him of "Alone in the Wilderness" fame -
when he retired at age 50 in 1967  
decided to build his own cabin in the wilderness
at the base of the Aleutian Peninsula,
in what is now Lake Clark National Park)
and certainly never belonged
to an Amish community,

never surviving with some degree
of independent comfort,
cuz the sole son of Harriet and Boyce Harris
overstayed his welcome
by living social under the same roof
as said mother and father,
who ofttimes delivered hollow ultimatums
to shape up or ship out –
meaning intolerance exhibited
toward their singular male offspring,

who struggled securing
and maintaining gainful employment),
hence fantasies throve
somehow magically acquiring
carpentry and farming skills
sturdy accommodations house families
where every timber secured by strong hands,
and stitch of clothing sewn courtesy adroit woman
traditional gender stereotypical roles obeyed
as if ordained by Biblical
credo, fiat, ideology, et cetera.
Strong men and women gave their level best
crème de la crème strongest and bravest
leaving grieving significant others
with emotional agony within treasured chest
o'er the redoubt the the enemy did crest
where lovely bones of forebears for everest
dead bodies strewn across killing fields
hostility among warring factions finessed
forsook their lives eternal peace they rest
honored and revered succumbed mortal
electric kool-aid acid test.

Now pardon ma faux pas
from dis po' pa try'n 2b sleek
line six starting here necessitated minor tweak
a reasonable rhyme rhyme,
where sense and sensibility weak

Officially called Decoration Day
proclaimed on 5 May 1868 by General John Logan
first observed on 30 May 1868
Waterloo N.Y. officially declared the birthplace
by President Lyndon Johnson in May 1966.

though seven and nine tenths score years  
since (minor emendation regarding time frame
since original date I crafted poem)
Appomattox, a psychological balm
helped stitch frayed nation to calm
served as silent psalm
since bombardment at Fort Sumter qualm.

National holiday most adept
at uniting Civil War fallen soldiers
when fiercely armed as brother in arms crept
against opposing forces, which took
by surprise “enemies” or found inept

ill prepared troops with surprise mortal
blow which ambushed attackers leapt
mowing down valiant soldiers, thus
becoming slain grooms who eternally slept
sorrowful lamentable hymns from
widowed brides tears wept.

Cease fire that day
terminating internecine flay
o’er mounds of earth whence
bones o boys donned blue or gray
a day of remembrance for those
who died in our nation's service lay

celebrated this last Monday every May
one must know tis not about division
boot about reconciliation
and sacrifice brave heroes did pay,
the price of their lives for granted
freedoms enjoyed as american lee-way.

Forsooth, now we cherish too, the Poppy red
That grows on fields where valor led,
It seems to signal to the skies
That blood of heroes never dies.
Warning: The following material no worse than getting cooties. I remember them way back in grade school, whereat everyone ran away from me with worse luck than Georgie Porgie, pudding and pie, who kissed the girls and made them cry, when the girls came out to play, Georgie Porgie ran away.

My humblest apology
if the following account
doth gross thee out
forlorn childhood of mine,
but remembrance of things
past icky and sticky
bumper crop of divine
nose diving delectable
diamonds secreted by
the mucous membranes
of the respiratory
passages, especially when
produced in excessive
or abnormal quantities,
e.g., when someone
is suffering from a cold
found further ostracization
of me tantamount
being shipped off
to a leprosarium.

As a chronic gold digger
in early grade school,
specifically within nasal passages,
I excelled at
locating awesome gooey gems.

The pinky seemed
most opportune for
button nose of mine as most
convenient handy dandy
blue's clues implement
to mine for juicy
succulent wads of yuck.

Early academic ex: pear
re: ants helped refine
delicate art of reaching
pitch perfect snot.

This individual craft essentially
entails extensive dexterity
in conjunction with
recognizing ideal picking time.

If one plunges
the little finger prematurely,
nothing but a glob
of **** will dribble out.

Best to wait until rock
hard sensation felt
when applying pressure to
either nostril.

The consistency of rock candy the
best analogy for this
other than tasteful habit
instinctively learned when
being housed in the womb.

Upon birth one
or more phalanges often
solidly locked where mucus generated.

This common medical
condition frequently requires
delicate intervention
(usually minor surgery)
to separate glued
gummy intertwined proboscis
from fleshy mitts.

As a natural born miner for
the most moist
and choice septum byproduct,
this lad as one gangly
whipper snapper mastered
the art of sifting
thru the sinus cavity to extricate
boulder sized buggies
wrote the book on the
ole factory chews.

Unlike many other young
children who fancied
this fun hunt for miniature crusty
crab cakes like formations
as delectable treats,
this grown man
when a little boy chose
to paste them on under
side of his desk.

No particular strategy for affix
sing goop upon
the underneath section of old
fashion unit (whereby
the top opened up and
provided a dish like formation
to store materials)
motivated this daily
cultivating for ripe buggies.

Within very few months,
the front most section
became quite thick
with wads of buggies that
quickly hardened into
scaly coating displeasing
even to my
high tolerance for gross.

Since no preliminary
measure for measure
took place to map out
where to place
the collection of daily glob,
inevitable contact took place
with aging dried
buggies that felt
like molting shells of insects.

Nightmares eventually
took place incorporating
this scary goblin
like creature (usually dripping
lugi with mossy slime),
which sought out his
insatiable hunger for buggies.

In these dreams,
I tended to be honored
with razor sharp fangs
and dagger type fingernails.

The latter came
in particular service
to probe my pinocchio-
sized smeller with
amazing ease to scrape
practically to the brain
(and perhaps some
grey matter did
get unintentionally removed)
to appease the buggy monster.

Soon after wake
king up in a start
from this nightmare (when
outsize still pitchblack),
a blurry image seemed
to dart away
leaving soggy footprints
closely resembling phlegm!
not just in time for Valentine's Day
but the remaining days of our lives
as the world turns
on all our children
the young and restless
now grown to womanhood

After being married
for nearly three and a half score years,
(our eldest daughter,
will celebrate her twenty ninth birthday
December 22, 2025,
hence you dear reader do the basic math),
I must admit a dynamic between me
and the missus, a gal who ofttimes claims
without a shadow of a doubt,
when she first set eyes upon yours truly -
a veritable stranger to her,
whose lips of mine
she hankered to plant a smooch,
I would have gladly welcomed
an unexpected pleasant kiss met,
(this then handsome late twenty/early
thirty something singular male
deeply engrossed with his nose in a book
while sitting on the steps
outside of Summit Presbyterian Church
located at 6757 Greene Street,
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania 19119),
knew now confessed courtesy female intuition
that instant karma
would foretell wedding bells
(scaring the bejesus out of me
at the prospect of spending
living years with spunky future bride )
despite countless ugly falling out scenarios,
especially sparked red hot poker rage,
when I adamantly blurted out
an ambition to date other women
canoodling with fecund enthralling gamines
just the mere thought of *******
drove pepe le pew into ******* mode
flights of fancy, which activated
an immediate and instantaneous *******,
(albeit puny poor excuse for a pulsating *****),
automatically triggering libidinal urge
seething with hormonal secretion),
and subsequent premature *******
said utterances of mine
to play the field of whet dreams
witnessed explosive verbal altercations
threatening violent outcome,
but who came to the rescue,
but none other than one
hulking hero named Frank Glass,
(he moved pianos for a living,
which explained outsize Popeye arm muscles),
he unwittingly served as a guiding light
keeping at bay dark shadows
creeping closer from the edge of night
intervened and smothered
potential Jerry Springer drama,
whereat the four foot eleven inch woman,
would still not accept "no" as an answer
no matter angry laced expletives
hurled like rocket propelled grenades
out the mouth of one ordinarily docile dude
undoubtedly kindled atrocious, contentious,
ferocious, jocoserious, and odious outbursts
heard all the way clear across to Compton
even thugs from the Crips and Bloods
took pause between their turf battles
to admire pugilistic suckerpunches
charging the air supply with crackling electricity.

Between stints of contra dancing
we exchanged glaring looks that could ****,
and afterward while walking
on opposite sides of the street
trudging to our respective vehicles
simultaneously exchanging nasty black barbs
lobbed off our respective tongues
each against the other
with heightened vindictiveness
cutting down to size
the person eventually
grudgingly accepted as my girlfriend
introduced and accepted with tepid response
from members of the Harris family,
likewise future groom
received icy cold unwelcome reception from
Zison patriarch and matriarch,
nevertheless in fits and starts
companionability fostered unspoken detente
eventually encouraging affectionate rapport
flavoring more hospitable tête-à-tête
slowly but surely inducing
overt unbridled yearning
(analogous blinding concupiscence)
tripped love making wire,
whereat most every opportunity
found us consorting,
ginning healthy interactions
allowing, enabling, and providing
a natural segue bedding down together day or night,
whether at 324 Level Road
or 1148 Greentree Lane
living together feigning wedded bliss
absent the minor issue of birth control,
unbeknownst to us earning kudos
from The Roman Catholic church,
which forbids contraceptive use
because it represents a sin against nature,
and premarital *** as well,
thus upon discovering visa vis
blithely engaging in unprotected ***
lo and behold bitta bing bitta band
begetting the future mother
of our eldest offspring
unwittingly helped definitive decision
to be made and marriage invitations
got made and handed out
to a select small number of people
exchanging holy matrimony vows
courtesy justice of the peace Henry J. Schireson,
who officiated legal proceedings,  
a Pennsylvania magisterial district judge
for Montgomery County Magisterial District,
which low key event
occurred July twenty fifth nineteen ninety six.
Twenty first century technology
allows, enables, and provides
instantaneous virtual unconsummated love.

Within the course of a texting or sexting session
one lovelorn lad (or grown man)
can fabricate a faux impression
with the young or old fellow claiming lineage
as a reincarnated Hessian
essentially a German trooper hired
by the British to help fight
during the American Revolution
principally drawn
from the German state of Hesse-Cassel.

Heavily reliant on the ability to embellish
I, a married communitarian, flexitarian,
latitudinarian, sexagenarian, and Unitarian
seek an applicable, flirtatious, illicit liaison
with a sugar mommy to relish.

Though basically discriminatory
father/husband impractical joker
caught the incurable texting/sexting fever
rationalizes triggering, voyaging,
and xeriscaping his prickly little garden borer
would not smack of adultery, infidelity, but
witness jocularity, levity, and negotiability
within the parameters of cyberspace.

Simulation of being electronically coupled
won't necessitate justice of the peace nor
wedding officiant or marriage officiant,
sometimes referred to as a celebrant.

Both people able, eager, ready and willing
to sample a pseudo/quasi
noteworthy scaled union
as all "good boys do fine"
for the treble clef lines
or "All Cows Eat Grass"
for the treble clef spaces
and "Fat Cows Eat Grass"
for the bass clef lines
can simply pledge their troth
for the duration of time spent online.

If game to feign *******, discipline
(or *******), sadism, and masochism
(as a type of ****** practice)
then Ubangi me,
and subsequently I do likewise to thee
all in good and healthy fun - ha!

Cavorting with sophisticated banter
would more closely
delineate mine harried style
swiftly tailored word play
not only in one direction
but also contesting each other
with palindromes and maybe
even talking in cryptograms.

Impossible mission to discover
visa vis other people
(predominantly of the female persuasion -
ideally a galavanting
gender conforming heterosexual lass
striving to hone her proficiency
with English language in general
and as a creative grammarian,
cognitive humanitarian,
and circumspective nothingarian
to whip out her wit and wisdom
for no particular rhyme nor reason,
but just merely to quip
for the sheer joy
of employing lingua franca.

If unsuccessful with deploying a figurative spark
courtesy atypical modus operandi videlicet
and fail to strike up a potential quasi match
with a receptive counterpart,
I will continue to entertain myself
summoning forth innovative verses
if for nobody else but yours truly (me),
who experienced joie de vivre
when satisfied with a written endeavor
trying to avoid bombastic, egocentric,
idiosyncratic, et cetera eye sores.

One must do whatever in their power
to cope with cares and concerns
of an uncertain webbed, wide world.

For me, that means reading and writing.
who suffered cuts by a thousand knives.

Even as old (dish) married
(spooning) curmudgeon,
who receives social security disability
linkedin with social anxiety)
chose the fork less traveled
aye pucker with sunken cheeks,
(especially without dentures)
and raspily suction toothless mouth
drawing reminiscent guffaws affecting
attempt impersonating plumber

(think suctioning and unclogging toilet)
please support your local ******
back in the day one
long haired pencil neck geeks palled
around with another
hirsute nerd - Roger Kummerer,
(who both of us graduated Methacton
High School class of 1977),
and yours truly readily
admitting, alluding, and attesting

without shadow of doubt
representing the dumber
than rocks of said beastie boys
bandits, donning particolored pachyderm
gabardine garb getup trumpeting,
especially as Mummer
on each New Year's Day
with bare *** tuchus
excellently imitating courtesy said orifice
(as chief motormouth) sound
of combo motorboat hummer.

Ah... the joys of amazingly aging gracefully
happily recalling never being
beat into ****** pulp dully
imagining dimming sense and sensibility
before (appearing gratefully dead)
lifeless body dumped into gully,
nevertheless all the while fully
maintaining conscious, and forcefully
summoning forth latent powers gleefully
choking living daylights masterfully

delivering just desserts upon Tom Viglione,
whose plaintive laments truthfully
resonate as blessed music
to ears unaccustomed hearing pitifully
sounding long overdue comeuppance
forever disbelieving wrongfully
perpetrated injustice
witnessed impossible mission
fueling an ordinarily meek lad
only in his dreams, he envisions zestfully.

Pugnacious thuggish hooligans...
although decades passed
(into the black hole sink
of space/time continuum)
long since elapsed, whereby hoodlums
jockeyed to rain upon the head
of yours truly,
who weathered figurative brickbats
by remaining analogous
to a deaf-mute person

one after another verbal blow
threatening introverted diminutive boy
who, no surprise did eventually,
albeit (stuntedly) grow
(as an aside resembled anorexic
Santa Claus **... **... **...)
still wracked, impacted, affected...,
this punster, he haint Joe
King, nor the Riddler, but upholds
valuable humor less or mo'

feebly, lamely, and quirkily aspires toward po'
whit tree linkedin with infusing,
(no matter ex post facto)
freeing mine unsung hero,
and perchance if I threw a judicious punch
(rearranging the face of thugs)
subsequently winning the respect
towards those beastie boys,
who would know better next time,
when they come back to town
than to tangle with the likes of me.
A generally cerebral acquisition
intertwining heterosexual generic guy,
who first started dating gals,
when a late teen/
early twenty something,
who overcame his shyness
courtesy consuming powder milk biscuits;
usually described as
"made from whole wheat
raised in the rich bottomlands
of the Lake Wobegon river valley
by Norwegian bachelor farmers;
so you know
they're not only good for you,
but pure... mostly.

Buy them ready-made
in the big blue box
with the picture of the biscuit
on the cover,
or in the brown bag
with the dark stains
that indicate freshness.

Whole wheat that gives
shy persons the strength
to get up and do
what needs to be done,
especially a then
first time contra dancer
such as yours truly – me!

Heavens, they're tasty, and expeditious!"

I buzzfeed jump/kickstarted to drone
how as humble male,
a propensity prevailed to secrete testosterone,
yet lament childhood's end,
an unhealthily docile boyhood
never realizing inclusion
nor fraternizing with classmates,
a stark realization throughout mein kampf.

Hence an (often feeble attempt)
to recaptcha forsaken interpersonal opportunities
when positive circumstances
appear palpable courtesy
interest exhibited toward yours truly,
or more particularly
his satisfactorily scribbled writings.

Overindulgence exuding profuse gratitude
most likely counterproductive
to teasing fledgling friendship
ofttimes recklessly voicing
expressing premature ejaculations
of amorousness linkedin
to profusion of unbounded love
invariably lobbing blitzkrieg
of desperation to undermine latent
intrigue housing initial sentiments

never vouchsafed tactile rapport
with author of these words,
whose impetuousness additionally pronounced
by inclusion of mine
America Online username
available after further correspondence
to sincere respondent
in immature hoop dreams to elicit
fantasy realization to strike up rapport.

At such hint of romance and elusive
fine prairie home companion to acquire,
I want to burst into song
with attendant accompanying acapella choir
oblivious reader would become jaundiced
regardless creative rhyme and reason,
where Rita meter maid,
actually a robot contrived thanks
be to artificial intelligence
within blink of her
sophisticated electronic eye
notices digital timer

precious minutes to display
favorable compression, depression,
disadvantageous expression,
irreversible impression,
malapropos progression,
et cetera didst expire,
who ofttimes referenced prior
experienced being flummoxed,
when few and far between
interpersonal scenarios embarrassingly
forfeited, kindled explosive charge
as if sparking electricity
issued from a shorted wire.

Amour propre frankly zapped
analogous to how swollen balloon
punctured or loosed from fingerhut
erratically zips thru air
flitting to and fro hither and yon
resembling how
on two separate occasions
witnessed bat out of hell or cowbird
similarly swooped dipped and dove
within our house got trapped,

(possibly fell thru fireplace flue),
whereby mother dearest shrieked
simultaneously swatting
(the only mammal
in the world that can fly)
nsync with rebel yell
(on par with exemplary performers as:
Swallowtail, the Flying Garbanzos,  
Wild Asparagus.

Within that milieu
of barnstorming hoopla,
I got me a wife
(currently taking her siesta),
though upon first setting foot
yours truly stumbled as with two left feet,
but mastered the following called steps
and routine became cakewalk.  

HOW TO CONTRA DANCE:

     Ask a partner (yea, that lonely looking gal or guy), who can never refuse to kick up heals in this rollicking shenanigan – the rumor holds that said activity the most fun one can have with his/her clothes worn.

     The caller will usually do a walk thru, which begins with the first two couples closest to the stage crew of lively musicians (frequently filling the makeshift hall with music aligned the genre of irish jigs and reels) beginning to pair off.

      After couples one and two (nearest the band) complete their quartet, this process (sans participants coupling off) continues until the foot of the line.

     Actually each duo of dancers within the foursome nearest or furthest from the podium dons the role of  “first and second” couple respectively.

     The walk thru can be helpful, especially for those unfamiliar with this social activity, which encroaches on the ordinary comfort zones because eye contact plus physical hand to hand fusion necessary.

     Many of the routines utilize various combinations of approximately a couple dozen unique moves, where each distinct extemporaneously choreographed fancy footwork utilizes a unique variation of such movements.
Death no longer jars, nixes,
and rattles mine sense and sensibilities
without pride or prejudice
no matter (even with marginal persuasion)
wit and wisdom of Jane Austen ill mixes
with what emotional state my poem fixes.

Father long since journeyed
into afterlife destination alone,
October 7th, 2020 mid afternoon
with Earthlings ministration did attone
where night enveloped and stamped
his lovely bones
rendered devoid of any groan
courtesy Roxanol (morphine)
and Ativan finding him prone

to experience painlessness, and no
his dying wish, plus last will and testament
won't include burial and/or headstone
cuz, he wants to integrate and did intone
cremation as ecologically friendly option
scattering ashes to parts known
someday... yours truly will too
succumb to the dead zone.

Stark reminder to live fully an urgent yen
to live life fullest between now and when...
ever yours truly exits
stage door left, perhaps ten
twenty, thirty... eighty, ninety, one hundred...
additional orbits around sun

a remarkable human phenomenon
(me) courtesy mine burning ken
bequeaths modest minute man
near accursed immortality longevity totaling even
score of years counting (crows)
and father time among his brethren.

Distress unavoidable which mortality doth bring
nevertheless, tis impossible mission
to eradicate pain and suffering, which doth sting
consolation assuages grief, viz prayer
and buttressing coping with spiritual wing
profound absence augments biting zing.

Biological reproduction begetting offspring
lodging within uterine abode
subsequent in utero development
regarding accretion embryonic node
biological algorithm doth automatically encode,
nevertheless longevity invariably affected
no doubt courtesy lifestyle mode.

Random crapshoot luck of the draw offspring born
genetic blueprints also decree existence transient
parents emphatically teach progeny
got no choice must inform

daughter(s), and son(s) ineluctably forsworn
demise bound with birth certificate presents horn
of dilemma conscious the next generation
granted only so many Earth orbitz around sun.

Once grim reaper deftly
communicates I must bid adieu
eternal hasta la vista to kith and kin
please don't shed a tear for generic
germane admirable bad company crew
member, albeit healthy as an ox
never got the flu,
an atheist doubting thomas

though genealogy records
incorporate many a cynical Jew
at least one legendary antiestablishmentarian
gleaned within mine purview
non-prodigal son edging closer
to the afterlife while livingsocial
within mortality queue
shunned, ostracized and banished to Xanadu.
finds yours truly sitting today
December 24th at 2:41 P.M. with slight
hunched over mien as  edge of night
quite some hours away when height
of Santa Claus appearance bright
rosy cheeks glow insync with
Rudolph the reindeer red nose.

As an indie alt rock'n
tribe beck ha dishabille poet,
I view the challenge of writing analogous
to betting an heir or heiress
which includes gestation of an, emotion,
idea, sentiment,...unbeknownst
if outcome birthed to be fabulous
then however the whimsical notion spins
within thine cerebral centrifuge,
the imagination pregnant with fetus
of a fledgling concept feeling
with byte size sea legs,

not quite ready for
prime time and beak comb devious
though, as swollen
womb dar full expansive
lettered girth manifests and coalesces
into miniature Confucius
versatile baby (unless unexpected contusions
render exertion aborted effort, the proud
pro-creator bounteous
which success inspires this scrivener
to tackle another and fleeting thought
and sire by product with audacity.

Oft times the sacred seconds silenced
by stillness louder than "Big Ben"
ear splitting only to me - squirreled away
in this makeshift basement den
the dead quiet, a riot
with audio logical sonic boom decibel -
asper a water nymph sprung from a fen
or when a sneaky fiery fox
slips into the house,
where the yolk cull doth roost
long fostering mass squawking
of manifold egg on eyes zing hen.

The end result metamorphoses into
a totally tubular unforeseen jumble
analogous to uglies that bump
of gibberish senseless wordy clump
aspiring to convey some essence of logic,
though best to take furlough than persist
to interpret dump
of discordantly strung English bits,
which intractable insistence
might spell f-o-r-c-e-d g-r-u-m-p
as the mood one may find them-self,

unless he/she can call
the literary mod squad
to resolve harrumph
and with any lucky trump
petting, the once amorphous lump
pen pro lit tarry hit might undergo
an amazing transformation -
a cherished poem plump
with juicy fruit
weighing down the boughs
as if limbs ready to slump.
I bought from Staples earlier today
November 18th, 2024
cuz the the older one malfunctioned.

Said older generation mouse sported
a rather extensive "mouse cable,"
one end of which ended
in a standard connector
namely a USB (Universal Serial Bus),
which plugged into the Macbook Pro computer.

Though the aforenamed laptop
equipped with a small square panel
containing different touch-sensitive areas
linkedin with cursor movement.

I much prefer to manipulate
that amazing hand-held device
detecting two-dimensional motion,
and translates "planar motion"
into cursor movement,
and yours truly (me) particularly elated
after quickly jimmying electronic
palm size pièce de résistance
to function without a hitch.

As part of an ARPA-funded experiment
to find better ways for computer users
to interact with computers,
Douglas Engelbart of SRI—
who would later work
on the DARPA-sponsored
ARPANET project,
the Internet's precursor—
invented the computer mouse.

Perhaps growing up
and attending public school
within Lower Providence, Pennsylvania
where quaint accoutrements
like blackboard and chalk
(and a daily volunteer -
ofttimes a teacher's pet - NOT ME
(hashtagged as a pestilence)
satisfactorily wiped the slate clean
for another day).

Matter of fact, I barely completed
twelve years of education,
where cribbed writing of mine
wrote illegible scratch marks
(mostly drawing blanks),
when examinations got handed out.

In retrospect, the much younger me,
(whether as a little boy, prepubescent,
older teen, and even as an emerging adult)
lived a quite sheltered life totally oblivious
to any danger field), and allowed, enabled
and provided himself to be mollycoddled
much against the objection
of a father and mother, and even myself,
whose pledge of allegiance
to passive aggressive behavior
wore patience thin

toward their singular male offspring,
whose unnatural control
of his (mine) spontaneity
in tandem with suppressed healthy predilections
essentially stunted emotional, mental
and physical growth and maturation.
Ofttimes, especially when trying to coax
extemporaneous good humor
constituting mine introspective mien
synonymous with mean during little boy

(think quintessential generative
artificial intelligence realm
where chatbot accidentally waxes philosophical
randomly and unthinkingly
displaying creative binary agility )
surfaces to level of consciousness
a mindset awakens
(particularly when attempting to evince
a playfulness crafting literary endeavors)
analogous to the impetuousness of a child,
whose innovative spirited "joie de vivre."
E'er since slip of a lad
little boy painfully shy
think Holden Caulfield
Catcher in the Rye,
(a teen cult classic penned by

Jerome David Salinger),
now resuming poem
about me, no why
ne'er beseeched, implored,
or pleaded to our Unitarian father
art thou in heaven...
socially withdrawn kid

wherefore I ne'er did ply
risk taking, and rarely did try
to test (dis)comfort zones,
nonetheless did despair
and silently decry
failing with flying colors plus my

lackluster luck concerning
absolute zero friends, I don't deny
abysmal classroom experience
linkedin with comprehension how to try
adding insult to injury teacher's pet
chosen to help, course

I wanted to disappear and die
feeling utterly inferior no lie
hated life (mine) anyone
could easily espy,
non verbal body language
spoke volumes, imagining

Matthew Scott to vanish
into thin air whisked into sky,
and even now envision well nigh
alien abduction, one garden
(hybrid) variety guy
taken as token Earthling, an ally

among nonhuman species, where
unconditional acceptance doth apply
feted as guest of honor trumpeted
profuse gratitude expressed to fortify
genuine appreciation, where the

multitudes of highly
intelligent robot anoint and deify
one humble scribe formerly
residing in Schwenksville,
the above I certify
as true so please don't vilify.
Nonverbal (though he could talk)
most of his responses
happened to be witnessed
as his characteristic
and courtesy enigmatic
trademark shoulder shrug.

If born free and clear today
skilled professional diagnosticians
employed within the mental health field,
would probably unanimously agree
he met criteria
as high functioning autistic spectrum
predicated upon withdrawn
and introverted behavior classic indications
after observing him in the classroom
just another brick in the wall.

As a baby boomer gifted with mental block,
versus my younger sister,
who experienced blessed with smarts,
(she enrolled in the equivalent
of advanced placement courses
throughout her 1979
senior year at Methacton High School)
as an exceptionally smart kiddo
in retrospect, I on the other hand
would designate myself
at the other end of the scale,
nevertheless few and far between
alternative options existed
for the girl or boy who exhibited
an evident struggle
(case in point yours truly)
difficulty comprehending, taking notes,
and effective time management,
to identify a few helpful skills
to succeed at established curriculum,
hence the opportunity
other than Saint Gabriels,
located in Audubon, Pennsylvania,
a residential program for male youth,
which closed in October 2020
housing those being
designated incorrigible and truant
subsequently relegated
as lumpenproletariat,
progressive ideas as alternative
to traditional teaching and learning paradigm
such as being homeschooled did not exist,
but among those deemed functional
with potential receptivity for learning
special ed students held singular option
a collective term fostering a stigma
instructing those described
as developmentally delayed, id est
cognitively, intellectually,

or organically challenged,
thus public, parochial, or Quakers,
also known as the
Religious Society of Friends school
only choices available to parents
or legal caretakers responsible
for the welfare of a minor existed,
hence Matthew Scott Harris suffered brickbats
when boarding the bus, sitting stock till
at assigned child unfriendly desk

to skadaddle under
when getting drilled with duck and cover
a civil defense measure,
primarily associated with the Cold War,
designed to protect individuals
from the effects of a nuclear explosion
involving quickly dropping to the ground
and shielding one's head and neck,
ideally under a sturdy object
like a desk or table.

The phrase also refers
to the drills and educational films
used to teach this technique
to schoolchildren and the general public.

How farcical and laughable
to maintain a ridiculous premise
believing humans to be indomitable
that by taking shelter under cover
of a measly solid object
he/she would be free of radiation sickness
proffering a false sense of security
in the event of unleashed atomic bombs
one would be safe and secure
from the fallout after a nuclear explosion
releases various types of radiation,
including gamma rays, neutrons,
and ionizing radiation  
emitted both during the initial detonation
(prompt radiation)
and as residual radiation
from radioactive fallout.
Absolute zero escape
velocity gutted dance
sing days (contra and square),
cuz metabolic full abundance
abdominal adipose tissue acceptance
not in accordance
with light as a feather
physique I sorely miss lost acquaintance
the boy within forced admittance
as sure man tanks of fat did advance
shotgun marriage demanded allegiance
to pledge lifetime alliance
no room for allowance
crushing lightness of being ambiance,
analogous to earth in the balance,
an uncomfortable truth
stares back at me
while looking in the mirror
a taunting reflection sneers
(strongly resembling the Grinch
who stole Christmas),
nor exist allies
(such as little Cindy Lou Who,
or any other member of the Wu-Tang Clan)
to help me combat
battle fatigue require
ring superman endurance
to muster strength
to stand ***** else ambulance
(much to the EMTs annoyance)
will whisk away husky
embarrassing appearance
loose fitting clothing
jelly roll appurtenance
overnight digital readout,
asper body mass index
scaled quick ascendance,
thus when showering,
I look askance
fearing bulging balloon
will necessitate assistance
else... diet of worms
as only assurance
safeguarding body electric
against hecklers at open casket
no matter, a small populace
madding crowd in attendance
yea... eventual cremation
after life only fat chance
to alleviate present circumstance
heavy matter fails security clearance
the price for astute cognizance
weak willpower alighting countenance
esse pie ying sweet treats
now measures taken to counterbalance
to fight temptation and dalliance
overruling feasting craving delectation
to restore trim deliverance
love handles around equator
no magician can render disappearance
yes the discontinuance
of just dessert must maintain distance
without being weighed
down with disturbance
by heaviest haunch
ain't no elegance
lugging extra encumbrance
when throughout my early life,
skinny, yet able to steel glance
mirrored reflection now grievance,
where wistful memory
ha...ironic insouciance
more so than
today finds intolerance,
thus woebegone issuance
thorn in muss hide
to experience jubilance
hmm...maybe a strong
arm can lance
excess flab quite a nuisance
to defy gravity, why penance
sans unsightly paunch
yours truly laments when just a skinny lad
epidermis fit skin tight, thus petulance
lame excuse unwanted protuberance
necessitates dedicated pursuance
recollection of washboard
abdomen impossible, yes inconvenient truth,
nevertheless acquiescence to body dysmorphia
only death do me part will witness quittance,
yet I gladly welcome videre licet reassurance
regarding unconditional acceptance
nothing accomplished by remonstrance
against physically embarrassing repugnance
thankfully the missus affects tolerance
of her hubby and practices vigilance
concerning buzzfeeding me healthy foods.
I confess, no deliberate intent, yet often wonder
what spurs me to nudge, goad, coax, et cetera
semblance of reasonable poetic rhyme
despite modesty regarding
ably linkedin words for others to ponder
more often than not experiencing nonresponder,
nevertheless share mine writing
with folks cyberspace out yonder
or aliens occupying
beyond the pale of outer limits
amidst the twilight zone,
where dark shadows
looming near the edge of night
hint of spooky forebodings.

Without lofty literary ambitions,
more so stream
of consciousness abandonment,
yours truly rests content
to cobble, gamble, noodle... courtesy
swifty tailored stylishly harried element
mild mannered modest gent
bumbling along boulevard of
broken (po' whet) dreams intent
far less superman than Clark Kent

exercising mental cogs and wheels meant
merely to liberate momentary overconfident
zealous spontaneous inspiration,
albeit ordinarily quiescent
ex post facto concluding
equals time most salient
direct object lesson learned
lame, insipid, feeble resultant
effort generates undercurrent
aghast how rapid
(think lightspeed) went.

Yours truly his own worst critic ad aware
how avast mein kampf replete with bare
inducent to tap into latent fledgling clear
propensity to express creatively, I declare
bonafide potential to join pantheon excelsior
reserved for established authors within their
respective canon, genre, league...,
nonetheless an obvious flair
seemed evident perhaps coalesced
when in utero biological gear

yielded wiggly, ugly, scrawny,
quirky Harris heir
(sole son and second of three offspring)
an older and younger sister,
which introverted brother bullies
did constantly jeer
token scapegoat suffered
one after another kingly leer
pushing psychological state near
precipice off into dock side of moon,

who sought
(wharf far art grim reaper) to pier
without naked qualm evincing
one very bony rear
without sympathy merely spells severely
pockmarked psyche therefore
impossible mission to set tattered self esteem
tacked toward in opposite direct where
dark shadow of doubt doth not veer
me into apathetic, horrific, pathetic...
suicidal mental state of yesteryear.
alternately titled: incorrigible lottery dreamer
big plans to relocate self and spouse
to some tropical island paradise
by the dashboard light
(the above line credited
to musician named Meatloaf)
upon arrival of Stanley steamer.

When my ship comes in loaded
and laden with precious cargo
from busy ports far and wide
captains trumpeting their arrival
donning sunglasses traipsing incognito
yours truly spied
at merchants wares
cast dark shadows
from the outer limits at noontide.

A fool's errand finds me emptying out billfold,
while being gagged and bound with a blindfold
My blood runs cold
My memory has just been sold
My angel is the centerfold
steaming with madness analogous
to exhaust or intake manifold,
especially as the winnings increase ninefold
videre licet building castles in the air
courtesy precarious scaffold
tumbles down into a bajillion little pieces untold.

Paradise visage and eyes a bulge with dollar signs
whets imagination with Mega Millions ticket bought
for potential wealth overtakes rational self
with delusions of grandeur caught
allow, enable and provide flirtation
with fate to experience rich draught
envision emancipation proclamation
and utter premature *******
from penury a distant battle fought

expect the usual outcome
after next drawing to yield monetary naught
temptation for instant millions eagerly sought
human foible to reach until life lesson taut
for elusive *** of riches
streak of universal desire
and tacked clear of shoals,
where hand to mouth
hardscrabble existence wrought.

This poor man's pipe dream
nsync with the milkmaid and her pail,
where fanciful notions
pluck me out being day late and dollar short
essentially pennilessness in the extreme
story of mein kampf fortune teller
also known as Zoltar speaks machine
said contraption did foredeem
substantiated, kickstarted, corroborated...
courtesy an archenemy Joaquim
(fiend nixed) and his tall sidekick Kareem
both rogues could shine figurative longerbeam
and discern mine ill fate,

Meanwhile creative endeavors
and linguistic pleasure
thru the literary attempt
suitably with my poetic side
third eye blind
(living a life of total focus
on the empty, finite lusts
of the material world,
instead of on the promise
of eternal realms of life hereafter)
palliative, yet less rewarding versus
garnering large sum of money
would be a dog send

delivered by one blessed angel in disguise
redemption and salvation assuage temptation
considered thankful find
with challenges or commiserate
and complement via words of positive kind
feeble attempt where words synchronize
readers may espy hidden puns
within this rhyme lined
to pry poem or prose from mind
deliberate semblance to communicate
and extract idea from cranial rind
analogous how stitcher doth tightly wind
a tapestry of rich and royal hue.

No..no...no...DON'T GET CLOSE
cuz, yea...yea...yea...
I suppose mailing altruistic donation
would be the safest lagniappe bet,
where over exposure
would most likely NOT infect thee,
though these really quirky,
phony (funny) germs can be inhaled
across transmission wires
thru the nose or data packets

bounced off satellites
as telecommunications specialists
worth while (and/or) even if I fall
precautions taken even extreme measures
such as cryogenics,
(where an individual
ideally after they die)
doth get froze,
nonetheless this communiqué
must be heeded cuz most effective,

and best assimilated
before one takes a doze
essentially (non fatal) lottery mania
flow within my entire being
from head to toe fungus
infected what this old rattletrap
specs castles in the air akin to a house of cards
careering into scattered mess
(resembling 52 pickup),
thus unknown reader

dune hot dare casinos,
gambling halls, horse racing, et cetera
lest ye contract an immobilizing,
yet fearless innocuous diagnosis,
buffer in themselves
with aspirin do sing glaring bug eyes,
plus affecting a hair styled,
and swiftly tailored demeanor
accompanied with Scrooge
(tiny timid lee)

intimating lurching, and ogling
qua monopolistic greed
expending every last red cent
indeed finding one
impoverishing themselves
at reo wagon light speed,
especially after getting flying high
courtesy stone temple pilot
buzzfeeding me with ****.
The word "it" is a pronoun,
a word used in place of a noun
to refer to a person, place, thing, or idea.

As a pronoun, "it"
is a third-person singular form
used as a subject or object
within a sentence.

I do not like starting, ending,
nor using the word it in a sentence
because ambiguity prevails
about what exactly it refers to whence
yours truly prefers the specificity
of more precise person, place or thing,
and attempts to be more definitive
versus leaving the reader
perched on a figurative fence,
thus I will go out of my linguistic way
to pause how to express intention hence
phrase a question or statement atypically
to escape the vagueness it connotes
even though any other ordinary person
asking what might be straight forward
entails the unwitting recipient
what competes as a dissertation
or novel to read at their sanity or expense
and no doubt smoldering rage
rises within their being
far surpassing a nearby
fire breathing amazing dragon,
who gets as angry as a red bull
igniting impossible mission to quell
essentially tossing out the book
how to resolve a win/win conflict
applying sensibility and sense
out of the question so...
the choice modus operandi
necessitates to carry on camping
despite the rancor being intense.

Honest to dog,
I did not expect a near apocalypse
figuratively shooting from the hips
taking poetic license
to express my aversion
against speaking or writing
the word with the two letters
each pronounced as eye and tea respectively
(taboo to me, and more offensive
then any expletive),
now I promise to keep sealed lips
for all eternity
exception to the rule being quips
reiterating penchant to steer clear
of couched Freudian slips,
where the idler wheel wiser
than the driver of the *****
and whipping cords
will serve you (a vip)
more than ropes will ever do
end of poetic endeavor
from one fascinating mensch,
who resides within 19473 coded zip.
There might be compatibility yet
even though this wordsmith,
even though, or maybe because
author of Perkiomen Valley, Pennsylvania
a riddle wrapped in a mystery inside an enigma,
especially if your figurative appetite
for comprehension I did whet
because all joking aside
just because I shun the word coded as 9-20
(so called the A1Z26 cipher
or letter number cipher)
doth newt make me a threat
but more to the point this doggone
could be your human therapy pet
and if the cosmic bodies align
we could create our own little kinglet
be it as it may, but...
methinks thee might well hurl unprintable epithet.
Preface:
On February 4, 1861,
the seven states that had seceded
by this point convened and created
the Confederate States of America
under the leadership of Jefferson Davis.

Just under two months later,
on April 12, 1861, Confederate forces
opened fire on Union-occupied
Fort Sumter off the South Carolina coast.

Starting but not completely reading a book...
tantamount to being sacrilegious,
especially when storied subject matter
deals with heated issue as slavery,
which essentially succinctly describes
war between the states
(purportedly started April 12, 1861 –
and reputedly ended April 9, 1865)
allegedly triggered
at 4:30 ante meridian on April 12, 1861,
when Confederate troops fired
on Fort Sumter
in South Carolina's Charleston Harbor.

Less than 34 hours later,
Union forces surrendered.

Traditionally, this event used to signify
the beginning of the Civil War.

Self imposed onerous obligation
understanding difficult to comprehend
thought provoking printed material
subsequently generated
system of the down overload
mine (myopic) eyes see the words,
but their meaning doth not compute,
especially when an author
chooses to write

in a bewildering, style,
thus "Abort, Retry, Fail?"
(or "Abort, Retry, Ignore?")
an error message
found in DOS operating systems,
which prompts the end-user
for a course of action arises
within sixty plus shades
of gray matter within me mind.

At present my fascination and interest
with American history temporarily appeased,
whence yours truly
envisions himself a Yankee
in the Antebellum North
thirstily drinking information
detailing one figurative chapter
concerning, detailing, giving
The Civil War breadth,
scope, width, et cetera
a narrative spanning
Fort Sumter to Perryville
painstakingly written
by the late Shelby Dade Foote.

An overactive imagination of mine
easily populated with sights, smells, and sounds
linkedin to that rebellion
(as ascribed by Abraham Lincoln)
witnessing the secession
of South Carolina followed
by the secession of six more states—
Mississippi, Florida, Alabama, Georgia,
Louisiana, and Texas–
and the threat of secession by four more—
Virginia, Arkansas, Tennessee, and North Carolina.

These eleven states eventually
formed the Confederate States of America.

Though the internecine fighting
weathered the test of eighty seven years
since July 2, 1776, when
the Second Continental Congress,
meeting in Philadelphia,
voted unanimously to declare independence
as the "United States of America".
Two days later, on July 4,
Congress signed the Declaration of Independence.

The Second Continental Congress
not initially formed to declare independence.

****** battlegrounds
minted ******* military men,
which soldiers when not fighting
sang sentimental tunes
about distant love—the popular
“Lorena” and “Aura Lee”
(which in the twentieth century
became “Love Me Tender”)
and “The Yellow Rose of Texas”—
and songs of loss such as
“The Vacant Chair.”

Other tunes commemorated victory—
“Marching Through Georgia”
considered a vibrant evocation of Sherman's ...
March to the Sea.

Some even sprouted from prison life,
such as "*****, *****, *****."

Soldiers marched to the rollicking
“Eatin’ Goober Peas;”
they vented their war-weariness with “Hard Times;
” they sang about their life
in “Tenting Tonight on the Old Camp Ground;
” they were buried to the soulful strains of “Taps,”
written for the dead of both sides
in the Seven Days’ Battles.

When the guns stopped,
the survivors returned
to the haunting notes of
“When Johnny Comes Marching Home.”
105 · Aug 2021
Avid Bookworms On The Loose
The American Library Association
      implores cognoscenti tubby alert
for impersonators, who
     call themselves Ernie and Bert

     took a page from Sesame Street Playbook
oft times accompanied
     by a Soundcloud of dirt,
boot none other then Pigpen,

     (who worked for Peanuts),
     and pay-dirt, though
     dismissed, cuz he did not exert
true grit, plus more seriously scandalous

     sordid details suppressed kept from press,
     (which scurrilous breach of conduct)
     involved said scallywag
     violating more than flirt

discovered in prurient compromised activity,
     where his skin flute encircled,
     with an ambrosia girt
transgressions possibly affected

     public television station benefactors,
     and sterling reputation of bottom line, nor hurt
locker talk (albeit via exaggerated mainly
     to make a profit) sounding proper

     sanctimonious Cliff (hanging) notes,
     asper faux expected by
     a "FAKE" trumpeting prophet,
     sans motley crue comic
     stripped of more'n
     motion picture PG ratings,

hence future lurid, graphic,
     banal, ampersand
(&) dressing room banter
     muted, disallowed, and banned

so storied characters birthed by Charles Shulz,
     (who passed away prior to near canned
aforementioned indiscretion debacle)
     returning amidst fanfare hoopla

     much as possible grand
jour "Making Peanuts Great Again" hand
diddly restoring full metal paperback jacketed
     glory and apple pie order land

ding rebirth of cherished popular iconic
     easy to digest bookworm feed
which unexpectedly, inadvertently,
     and horrifyingly

     brewed ferocious breed
on par with the Alaskan Bull Worm,
     whereat armed guards
     strategically stationed

     at libraries entrances indeed
aware voracious young readers,
     would pay no heed
to any obstacle, and such unstoppable

     ravishing knowledge
     hungry kids did exceed
capacity security details dashed away,
     faster then Clifford
     the big red dog re: oh speed

wagon in toto (oz suppose)
to escape paginated bound woes,
but especially to flee bozos
not tubby confused with Bezos -
     (the richest cat on Earth),
whose cashiered spigot flows
née  gushes without any need to faucet.
Nonetheless this bard ****
videre licet punster mocker feels gratitude
courtesy Kaitlyn Gilsenan, PA-C
a moost deal height full medical technician
without cerumen eye zing
September 27th, 2024 'ere
and thank dog guardian angels,
who find me continually blessed
regarding audiological sense to hear,
whereby faculty sound waves
enter outer ear and travel through
a narrow passageway
called the ear canal,
which leads to the eardrum.

The eardrum vibrates
from incoming sound waves
and sends these vibrations
to three tiny bones in the middle ear.

These bones are called
the malleus, incus, and stapes
availing yours (us) truly to hear
such phenomena quite amaze zing
listening to structures of silence on wing
and prayer grateful dead ring
around the collar soundwaves,
which analogously ping
pong with supreme functionality
and pleasantly and gloriously bring
audible world wide web despite
my senescence, though
amazingly gracefully aging.

Vacuum suction instrument
extracted waxy secretion
made up of dead skin cells and hair
that combine with discharge
from two different glands
in case your not ad aware
allowing me to revel
detecting auditory sounds
particularly evening mating call
of a distant Neanderthal

cave woman dear
such simple pleasure + specialists
magic touch who restore
bitta bing bitta bang receive little fanfare
for the common man
though gratitude prompts this Harris heir
to wince as when Androcles pulled thorn
from out paw of lion ensconced in his lair
relief from short lived discomfort vis a vis
insertion to probe with utmost care

once again restores ability to detect
sounds far or near
sans glob of gelatinous goo aerates passage
way to appease head of this papa bear
he roars like Tony Tiger with utmost delight,
which might easily be confused as a glare
ring against blockage
wrought by ear wax ***
solid and to seat self and enjoy pleasure
of sitting on angelic porcelain chair

expending maximum exertion
to expel obstructed waste within uranus
jabbing little sphincter sphere
induces analogous painful defecation
from constipated rear
once either bound orifice freed from
gob lit tee **** obstruction finds
writing glorious air
no more extreme muffled nor pearl jam
fluid pressure in Eustachian tube

bring little relief analogous
experiencing swollen vein or
group of veins in **** aggravating hemorrhoids
pulled to the max and practically tear
ring until every last ounce of muscular
might applied via
primal screams filling the air,
whence solid waste
from body jettisoned on a par
which I reiterate above

with different wording
caked brown blockage making
this chap feel deaf and barely able to hear
when gooey resin from skin cells
lining our outer ear canals
constituting tiny glands relieved
from stopper like strikers at O’Hare
finally remedied from medical practitioner
an absolute save e year
allowing Matthew Scott Harris, who
once again can exalt in life without a care.

Though no medical practitioner,
yours truly doth assign
value to learn tidbits,
enamored how biology
and evolution did codesign
about body electric (mine)
being proactive to nip
in figurative bud potential detriment,
that usually gets diagnosed as benign,

especially biannual examination
concerning ears, nose and throat
relieved said ***** divine
delivering sonic boom, where
one mortal grovels, while fading
sunlight dances and
enables fading poetic moonshine
to manifest itself without rhyme
nor reason, neither sense nein

sensibility, no doubt readers pine
I desist tempting urge to combine
words together begot
as prodigy progeny
directly linkedin with
impressive "fake" authorial scion
just back after after taking extended
holiday/sabbatical within Apennine
Mountains to bolster every vital sign.

Modern medical science doth allow
enable, and provide this primate
cause he feels wowed at how
examinations every now
and again (usually six months apart)
Medicare doth pay
so one doggone old sow
war **** till death
doth him part, he will vow
to vet health issues,
and in the end barks a final bow wow.
Quotidian dedication describes
das deft dude,
his promising passion
with English language
within recent past dim sum
might notice he brewed

poems about common
trials and tribulations food
for thought self sadist factorially
reasonably rhyming oft times
incorporating analogy, metaphor, simile
more so to stave

writer's block fortitude attitude
versus less to impress any
first time unknown reader,
or anonymous regular
guy/gal follower disproportionately
emphasizing burgeoning agonizing

travails analogously Druid
cursed his existence fearsome
oaf got me matt chewed
rendered into pulp fiction
subsequently spit viewed
within circle comprising

cannibalistic primate creatures
roam'n around within
makeshift amphitheater crude,
yet sophisticated as
simplistically configured, construed
convoluted edifice witnessed

snaking snarky conga line
weaving and bobbing amidst
totemic pillars where well
kneaded, muscled, oiled...
flesh glimmering while ****
on green acres, whereat

arbitrary petticoat junction etude
aired by linkedin foo fighting
beastie boys in the hood
paying homage to their
benevolent patron - Saint Jude
honoring self serving

cisco, duck, eagle - feather nesting
arrogant, bombastic, conceited...,
egos trumpeting barren airs
exuberantly keyed how
village people got royally *******
taken to cleaners riverside,

whereby sudden deluge didst flood
courtesy of... mad
don (huh) feeling stewed,
who sought world dominance
raged at populace he should
receive nobel peace prize

and voted, nee crowned emperor
demanded cachet else...
he promised to force unglued
freedoms of life, liberty
and pursuit of happiness!
while channeling the energy of Google
exemplified by cute and cuddly moogle.

I awoke from mid-day siesta
exuding peaceful easy feeling
total all encompassing bliss
suffused body electric of mine.

Ecstasy resonated within these lovely bones
triggering subliminal stimuli from head to toe
profound tranquility linkedin
entire corporeal essence,
what me worry mindset
bundled every nerve
transcendent state issued forth
analogous to standing
in the middle of an intersection,
where converged sense and sensibility
without pride or prejudice
experienced as ******* natural high
rippling into soothing nexus
of acute momentary emotional nirvana
watching within third eye blind
"the quick brown fox
jumps over the lazy dog"
which sentence contains
all the letters of the alphabet
if in doubt (take a pawn)
and Google for yourself.

Despite any care and concern
within the webbed wide world,
I seemed to float above the fracas,
especially the fiasco of the fires
their utter ruination laying waste
entire Los Angeles neighborhoods
seen from afar absolute zero familiarization,
a futile endeavor trying
to identify any hint of recognition
impossible mission to comprehend
the mind boggling death and destruction
encompassing the second largest city
within the contiguous United States
far as the eye can see
extensive obliteration and desolation
analogous to aftermath
of dropped atomic bombs
unleashing their powerful fury
minus the radiation fallout
offering foretaste of
hell on earth annihilating life,
liberty, and the pursuit of happiness
shaking and baking bedrock faith
witnessing enraged shaking fists
screaming (at the top of one's seared lungs)
accursed blasphemy exploding
against omnipotent creator
questioning unfair punishment,
nevertheless birthing good samaritans
offering emotional nurturance
while drones buzzfeed
truckloads of information
using radio frequency (RF) communication
through a data link, sending data
like location, altitude, speed,
and live video footage
from the drone's camera back
to the ground control station
via a dedicated transmitter and receiver,
typically operating on frequencies
like 2.4 GHz or 5.8 GHz
depending on the drone model
and intended range;
this allows for real-time control
and monitoring of the drone's flight.

Suddenly doggone petty trials
and tribulations in Lake Wobegon
(my adopted hometown out there on the prairie
offtimes visited by Garrison Keillor)
finds us speechless, and numb
structures of silence
crackling, popping and snapping
courtesy non-verbal communication
linkedin to eerie decimation
courtesy ferocious acceleration of Santa Ana winds
strong, dry, and hot winds that blow
from the inland areas of Southern California
towards the coast, typically originating
from a high pressure system
over the Great Basin desert,
causing them to be very warm and dry
as they descend through mountain passes,
often exacerbating wildfire risks;
they got named
after the Santa Ana Mountains
through which they frequently flow.
Ofttimes, I nearly find myself choking,
and frantically beck-kin
for immediate intervention in vain,
and my time is a piece of wax
falling on a termite
that's choking on the splinters...
analogous to swallowing a vitamin
that gets stuck in my throat
and the story of mein kampf
flashes before myopic eyes
of mine, and suddenly panic
ensues jump/kick starting an
immediate repentance of all
misdeeds perpetrated since...
birth, particularly when emerging
out chrysalis of boyhood to young
adulthood becoming aware
how yours truly affected
those people who came
in contact with me,
whether directly or indirectly,
acquaintances, family, friends,
strangers, et cetera, even women,
who text and sext me
thru Facebook Messenger,
whereat my accidental and untimely death
linkedin to foreign body airway obstruction (FBAO)
after swallowing one of countless
over the counter vitamins
ironically in an attempt to stave off
contracting a contagious mortal illness,
cuz I wanted to live a healthy life
at least reaching the bicentenarian milestone
regaling younger generations
before mine instantaneous,
horrendous, grievous and frivolous
exit stage door left,
(one signature catchphrase
the ghost of Snagglepuss would envy),
whereat next of kin
found lifeless body
of Matthew Scott Harris
gratefully dead no longer truckin
from a most horrid demise,
not even Saving Private
Ryan Grace could resuscitate,
on the plus side,
he avoided fallout linkedin
after three Musk kit tears
trumpeted MAGA nuff fa cent
complements of Project 2025,
which manifesto asphyxiated
and practically snuffed out life,
liberty and the pursuit of happiness
for better or worse,
(and from this point,
the poem takes on a life of its own)
deleterious ***** deeds done dirt cheap
courtesy the forty seventh president,
(whose name cannot be uttered
in polite society
lest bringing about misfortune),
yet whose administration imperiled
bedrock of democracy,
which manifesto asphyxiated
and practically snuffed out life,
liberty and the pursuit of happiness
for better or worse,
thankfully I escaped webbed
wide global depredations
by dint of unexpected series
of unfortunate events
courtesy being defeated
videlicet grim reaper,
whereby the coroner averred
the deceased succumbed
to a rather torturous demise
before the end of the world as we know it
leaving two grown daughters
and a wife, (whom he wed July 1996)
and lived happily ever after
yeah right - in his whet dreams
banging on the doors
qua openings or access points
to this collective psychic realm
housing Spiritus Mundi
to be welcomed into the realm.
Equally Worthy As Mine

No explanation why,
the following unpleasant memory
     shocked this systemofadown human vie
bur rent lee, suddenly, and oppressively
     as if...a heavy object
     fell from the sky
knocking render yours truly
     into a crash test dummy

     tail spinning vertigo,
     where the soul of this guy
at this moment, when
     the following misdeed
     occurred well nigh
many werewolf full
     moons ago, hence a sigh
leant echo with matthew scott
     till he doth die!

Nonetheless, to my
     dying day I cannot
     forget, nor allow
un paw din nub bull sub woofing,
     recollection, yet try as I might ow
(the psychological pain
     still rubbed red
     dully bone raw),

     where ring around
     the collar of
     this  paw - pow
whir fully, doggedly,
     grudgingly, now
fines me to em bark
     with a shrill bow wow
impossibly (even

     incrementally) forgive
     thy then girlfriend, now
spouse of approximately
     deux dozen plus
     years Oh my
     DOG - "holy cow"
forsaking the beautiful
     faithful, and loyal "purportedly
    
     man's beast friend,"
     and ideal chow
mate, upon venting still
     smoldering grief
     when said wife
egregiously, heartlessly, and
     indiscriminately, (though not
     deliberately) evoked strife

(cross) be still finds me gnashing,
     where emotional grief rife
this closing November 19th, 2018
     analogous to a serrated knife
tearing, stabbing, ripping,
     and gnaw zee ate
     ting lee wreck conning
     this melon collie life

of mine, no more valuable,
     than a unconditionally loving
     creature "put down"
     at the Chester County S.P.C.A.
leaving this aging puppy
     with an indelible frown,
which sad recollection

     unleashes sorrow every noun
and again, which
     unrelenting hounding
agony, asper an non
     healing wound tantamount
     to unsolved killings
haunting ghost town.
if a 2024 November presidential Biden win
pandemonium likely to occur,
subsequently figurative tectonic upheaval  
might set United States in a tailspin.

Though discouraged, disenchanted,
disheartened, et cetera Democrat,
I intend to exercise enfranchisement
wherein human made his habitat
within Schwenksville, Penna,
a washed out town with one laundromat
pessimism rains heavy on my heart
reverberating a prominent pitapat
hoping on a broken wing
and a prayer
trumpeting Republican theocrat
blessedly outvoted videre licet
sense and sensibility courtesy electorate.

Yours truly attests the candidate
signified by donkey
the lesser of two evils,
a cruel trick doled out
courtesy fickle finger of fate
braying against lumbering Elephantidae
Thomas Nast of Harper's Weekly
in 1870 he did illustrate

said animals as caricature
he did humorously sketch
though expressing tacit approval
for elder incumbent
octogenarian quintessential statesman,
he (a common gentile Joe)
exhibits the preferred alternative,
though secular Semitic humanist,

I vouchsafe present
commander in chief
bares the sisyphean onus
to foster entente cordiale
among various and sundry
governments linkedin across
the webbed wide world,
particularly vocalizing, orchestrating,

invoking dovish overtures
unnamed politician obligation
his adherents must take a stand
and serve as ambassadors representing
peace and harmony
for instance such as conferring freedom
regarding oppressed Palestinian people
Israel must liberate

allowing, enabling, and providing
their own destiny (lies) to operate
versus being humiliated
courtesy where boot heel diplomacy
of autocrat bully and regulate
every friggin action
brutally commanding, goading,
lording over, et cetera subjects

when, where, and
how to breathe or urinate,
plus current occupant
of Executive Mansion
must not resist
parlaying olive branch,
which amped up energy,
would tax even an envoy

even at her/his prime,
which younger generation
must be entrusted to govern
since four score chronological orbitz
logically, seriously, zealously...
automatically must disqualify
office holder/seeker, whose
emotional, mental, and spiritual fitness
necessitates body, mind, and spirit triage

no more than half life
of aforementioned age,
cuz youth in general,
(and women in particular) bubble
with near boundless energy
regarding promulgating win/win
within realm of conflict resolution
emblematic of Lake Wobegon,
the little town time forgot,
and the decades could not improve .
Yours truly jogs his memory to write
about witnessing bats appearing at twilight
swooping mammals (in search of prey) quite
silently whooshing thru the dusky night
flitting to and fro, hither and yon
across the darkening sky
analogous to erratic zigzag pattern
traced courtesy skittering kite
resembling little black birds
(think chimney sweeps)

predicated espying them from height
of about five feet and ten inches
beautiful creature whom
one human they excite
dark shadows temporarily
eclipsing man in the moon
obscuring said natural satellite of Earth,
come cool weather,
whence winged wafting animals own birthright
despite suffering **** sapien
wrought them *** rap reputation.

Though initially frightful,
bats unique aesthetically beguiling
captivating anatomy does appeal
and compromising said species
quite a big deal
cuz they naturally regulate
an essential role in pest control,
pollinating plants and dispersing seeds.

Recent studies estimate bats
eat enough pests to save
more than $1 billion per year
in crop damage and pesticide costs
in the United States corn industry alone.

Habitat destruction undermining
aforementioned living things
akin to Damaging Achilles heel
anthropomorphising, (albeit personifying)
planet earth, an entity
all living things get their meal
cuz meddlesomeness to steal,
viz humans beings self appropriating
bountiful resources of Gaia
with selfish zeal
only spells demise
of self serving bipedal hominid.
Plethora of humans (think overpopulation)
directly linkedin to planet Earth dire strait
re: environmental catastrophe, née debacle
teeters along brink tipping point inevitably
pitching civilization headlong into oblivion
**** sapiens (minus those living off grid)
admirably self sufficient unto themselves,

perhaps ecological intentional community
while yours truly, one guilt ridden scrivener
laments impacting minimal carbon footprint
(courtesy these thankful little feet size nine+)
nonetheless psychological torment wracks
lovely bones garden variety/generic human
specifically comprising complex edifice me

Matthew Scott Harris riven with loathsome
abomination, constipation, indignation, et al
mustered, tethered, yoked into capitalistic,
commercialistic, consumeristic ditto et alia
versus altruistic holistic, simplistic again re:
call synonymous words regarding contrast
between belching, exhausting, and polluting

(naming three adjectives describing impact
predominantly nsync with prophetic albeit,
profit oriented profligate, profane paradigm
unleashing immense global carbon emissions
see following website for further details: https:
//www.scientificamerican.com/article/co2-
emissions-will-break-another-record-in-2019/.

Impossible mission to uncouple accountability,
(no matter minuscule - veritable drop within
figurative bucket when quantity contrasted/
compared alongside industrial waste courtesy
major corporations), yet helplessness prevails
survival (mine) inextricably bound trappings
twenty first century allow, enable, and provide

exploiting even dollop so called nonrenewable
resources, I could sacrifice corporeal entity -
body, mind and spirit within eyeblink exhales
last breath before becoming repurposed - inert
cremated ashes randomly scattered across all
points encompassing terrestrial world wide web.

Obituary -
Despite havoc primate species did wreak
from the afterlife I figuratively speak
and applaud millennials whose peak
performance accorded courtesy
your token "aged hippie,"

and long haired pencil necked geek,
whose disembodied spirit
now volunteers as Halloween sideshow freak
incorporating gallows humor tongue in cheek.
103 · Dec 2023
FROM SANTA CLAUS XMAS 2011
written twelve years ago
when yours truly about two score
and twelve years old,
and fishy financial fiasco
about twenty six weeks
before being scalloped
courtesy villainous fraudster
otherwise known as scam artists,
blithely, glibly, and pliantly
fleeced with shear trickery
my coveted nest egg.

TO: TWO PRECIOUS HARRIS LASSES
WHO LIVE ON GREENTREE LANE
THIS FAST APPROACHING CHRISTMAS HOLIDAY
AS WILL READILY BECAME PLAIN
RECEIVED A SPARTAN GOVERNMENT LARGESSE
WHICH AFFORDS PRESENT
ONLY ONE BOX OF COAL APIECE
DISAPPOINTMENT THIS PA
HUMBUG ** HUM FELLOW
WILL TRY TO EXPLAIN.

OUTRAGEOUS COSTS
TO CLOTHE ELVES
WHAT WITH DESIGNER CLOTHES
AND THE LATEST TECHNOLOGICAL GIZMO
NEARLY BROKE THE PIGGY BANK
IN ADDITION TO FEED THE REINDEER
COMPOSED OF BUCKS AND DOES
THIS I TELL YOU
TO BE EARNEST AND FRANK
WHICH GRUELING BUSINESS
NEARLY FOUND LITTLE ***(ETS) FROZE
THIS GOVERNMENT ACTION
NO HALLOWEEN PRANK
NEARLY FOUND ME BEHIND BARS
ADDING TO UNFORTUNATE WOES.

SMALL TOKENS ACQUIRED
BY THE ABILITY TO SCRIMP AND SAVE
A PITTANCE COMPARED
TO LAST YULETIDE
YET NO INTENT TO BE MEAN SPIRITED
NOR RANT OR RAVE
FOR BOUNDLESS LOVE SPILLS FORTH
FROM SENSITIVE PRIDE
NO MATTER SOME
PERCEIVE ME UNSAINTLY
PURSE NICKETY KNAVE
RANK AS A WORSE CREATION
THAN FRANKENSTEIN’S BRIDE.

TRY TO REMEMBER
TIS THE THOUGHT
FROM WITHIN TO GIVE EACH
AND EXTEND THE SPIRIT
OF GOOD CHEER
THAT COUNTS MORE
THAN SPEND LAVISHLY
AND TO REALLY TEACH
SO CHERISH EACH
AND EVERY MOMENT
WITH PASSION TO SPARE.

NOW ONWARD AND UPWARD **
WITH THE SOUND OF SLEIGH BELLS
BACK TO THE NORTH POLE
THIS POOPED OUT HERD WILL GO
AND THE EXPECTED GIFT
FROM THE MISSUS A LUMP OF COAL
PLUS A LAUNDRY LIST
OF DUTIES PERFORMED
WHILE ENDURING TEMPERATURES
(INCLUDING WIND CHILL FACTOR)
THAT FEEL LIKE…
WELL BELOW ONE HUNDRED BELOW.
no longer land of the free home of the brave,
original rightful occupants hoodwinked, petrified,
where diseases xeroxed
ambushed, crushed, extinguished,
squashed, trashed, wampashed,
the entire kit and kaboodle zapped
violent unwelcome intruders
celebrated acquisition or outright
annexation of lands
inhabited by indigenous peoples
showcasing courtesy outright theft
torturing, liquidating, flourishing braggadocio
nattering nabobs of nativity
pièce de résistance mere pennies on the dollar
one group of marauders after another
ravaged "Turtle Island" -  a name used
by some Indigenous peoples
traditionally used by Iroquois,
and also the name of a creation myth
shared by many Indigenous peoples
to refer to the continent
in North and Central America
the latter also known as "Mesoamerica,"
which refers to the geographical region
encompassing both Mexico
and Central America,
particularly when discussing
historical contexts like ancient civilizations.

After clicking the following website
both lines copied and pasted in the search bar
https://preview.redd.it/upph2px5nj151.jpg?
auto=webp&s=7d9a267a573ce0cdcde601396d833a34447cf475
look closely at the map
and notice the strong resemblance to testudo.

Dark shadows pronounced
the outer limits of twilight zone
framing surreal night gallery
witnessed within my mind's eye
obliteration far as these organs of vision can see
after distinct voice of Aloe Blacc,
whose singing did wake me up
to the webbed wicked world
(from what I methought a vivid dream),
whereby one naked ape
buzzfeeding, droning, hashtagging
as stone temple pilot roared overhead
ogled barenaked ladies 
reality proved me wrong
while my body electric shuttered
drenched in a cold sweat.

Within close proximity,
I heard braying donkeys
trampled by herd of elephants
indicative of human political zoo
yours truly also observed
improvisational theatrical performance
characterized in fits and starts
of "La Cage aux Folles"
imitating lioness on four paws
amidst the farcical tableau,
when Doctor Seuss
made cameo appearance
punctuated with Horton Hears A Who
twas analogous to an Orwellian animal farm
tragicomic dystopian distorted reality come true
My Chemical Romance performing
welcome to the black parade
soundlessly mouthing words
while the madding crowd stood in queue
when much to my surprise,
I espied my only nephew
grown into strapping specimen
of the human league, I hardly knew
living social in Brooklyn Hebrew
profile in courage
exuding breakfast of champions
fit as a fiddle aura, charisma, dogma karma
alcohol and drugs he did eschew
adopting altruistic, holistic, idealistic, et cetera
lifestyle bespoke breakthrough
riding a bicycle without any handlebars
forlorn, I ambled amidst the ruins,
where democracy obliterated
courtesy the kamikaze course
of Project 2025, his pet project
gratis forty seventh president
videre licet United States of Trump.
Analogous to fire breathing
puffed up imaginary dragon
(in a land called Honah Lee)
ye might rightly think
what the deuce
haunting spectre ace of spades
good fella aiming to be a poet all about,
meaning sexagenarian wordsmith,
this once upon a time jackanapes
presently decked out like cadaverous card

still sporting fine kingly raiment
and crown of thorns atop noggin
impossible mission
to disguise rapscallion mien,
nevertheless mine true harmless colors
glowingly dim meant shunned
buzzfeeding demonic, horrific
malefic tightly coiled asp
symbiotically fostering mein kampf
thru poisonous white fangs,

I strive and stride rite
to live life like good humor man,
until grim reaper
rocked my boat whose death on par
for an impractical joker,
after rigor mortis seized body electric,
hence burial at sea where mates
honored wish of mine on the briny deep
shipped overboard in a casket wrought of oak,
where (yes) grateful dead foo fighter

hoisted into Davy Jones' locker
after one last exhilarating heavenly ****
from potent Cannabis
and draught of stout ale
finally freed me from ills
of a morose lactose intolerant
impotent existence that did yoke
body and mind and set spirit soaring
like aircraft christened
Saint Louis mine being
riddled with angst.

When alive with the sound of music
and robust health
smitten with searing infatuation
to sow seeds of life and white lily
during jump/kick starting manhood,  
when hormonal secretions
found me being
naughty bit player for prime time
innocent untainted puppy love
concerning fecund (she),
the unbeknownst petty heartbreaker
with whom I fancied
and fantasized to pledge my troth
which hand of distressed damsel
never tested to fit mine like a glove,
nor sanctified debauched soul asylum demise
and death be not proud courtesy
Spiritus Mundi above.

Now gnarled arthritic fingers
and bowed back
these lovely bones severely jangled,
when cough that doth wrack
accompanied by thick choking phlegm
gagging yours truly
while lying supine on me deathbed
disrupted with torturous hack
panting like an overworked dog
even after the leash goes slack.

Every end of year
when auld lang syne sung
weather beaten formerly
well muscled skiff wrung
after being subjected
to whims of mother nature
cannibalistic headhunters
interestingly enough poked and prodded
buzzfeeeding me rawbits
eroded taste buds populating tongue

recorded global cuisine
avast webbed wide world
across all four directions of compass
found globetrotter huzzaing
experiencing evanescent,
concupiscent and acquiescent
aborigines far flung,
where couple females in particular
among the madding crowd
of barenaked ladies struck my fancy

amusing themselves with innocent
coy non verbal repartee,
where one in particular approached
with outstretched legions
of extensive alms,
where colorful amulets sported
to stave off superstitious
shrunken skull and crossbones
dangled and clung.
December first 2020 equals
thee above named sibling
whereby she completed
LXIII earth orbits around the sun
therefore incumbent upon me
(cuz yours truly to wish happy birthday

at receiving end of much largesse)
to wax poetic regarding beloved sister,
which brother of yours feels blessed
to experience and count
thee as his eldest sibling.

On clocking one year after another,
(which orbitz around the sun)
whip away approximating light speed)
I feel pitched to and fro, hither and yon
into the maws of utter madness,

and thee utmost like an anchor
serve to buttress mine emotional duress
more so acknowledged later in our lives
no matter steadfastness
of heartfelt care and concern

prevailed these three score years of mine
prompting yours truly to reflect
especially those vicissitudes
severely testing psychological mettle,
whether twas mine

tumultuous, opprobrious, hellacious...
descent into abyss of despair
(think bout with anorexia nervosa
that cost me mental, physical
and social expense),

I still figuratively pay the piper,
hence continue to rue
rarely ever taking stock
concerning unwavering love
toward one (me),

who fell short reciprocating gratitude,
where pseudo maternal tendering occurred
during formative boyhood
and even into emerging
adulthood days of mine.

Though just thirteen plus months my senior,
ye donned role as guardian
bullies ye did verbally cuff
when I got decreed as scapegoat
passively resisted brickbats,
til badasses sucker punched,
mocked, chided wimpy me more'n enough,
hence when bullies
saw yar ferocity they ran,

cuz ye took no guff
said mean kids took off in a huff
methinks if only I had therapy dog
named Teddy and/or Ruff
to protect me against thugs,
whose insecurity rocketed
poor little Matthew Scott
they threatened harm
to brag as neighborhood tough.

Gratitude wells up
recognizing worthiness you
exemplify, a spouse
(Richard McGeehan) who
did ardently woo,

after asking to dance pas-de-deux
as lifetime partner,
plus recognized keeper
bonafide then young gal true
lee worth her weight in gold,
or any other precious metal.

Marriage (codified, indemnified, and ratified
June 1990 - courtesy Harvey Whitten),
between ye and ardent husband
will moost definitely stand the test of time
cuz, each to the other a counterpart
analogous to rock of Gibraltar.
courtesy ******* minus preemptive measures
while plugg naughty bits of tarnished knight
while he took tea and crumpets within mistress's boudoir

The following verses typed out some years ago,
but equally pertinent and relevant to the ebb and flow
of my life today, and as ye become familiar with me
time and tide will tell lo'
more to thee just ask me and I (a letterman) will show.

After viewing Netflix
documentary life after death
portraying instances
where subject(s) pronounced
courtesy words one rapt listener
doth most fearfully dread
according to metrics
regarding absent heartbeat
and absolute zero brain activity,
yet after span of countless minutes
came back into the realm of consciousness
methinks mebbe mourning one grateful dead
premature ******* er utterance
superfluous and no longer acceptable

analogous to gasoline without lead
or also on par with emotional immaturity
still leaving psychological repercussions
bombarding the inside of mein head
admittance being immature
since taught me delicate
diplomacy of relationships
which deprivation of healthy
linkedin heterosexual rapport bred
hunger to appease libidinal longings
tugging, pulsating, jumpstarting the *****.

Nsync with variations on said theme:
various and sundry
pseudo lurid fictitious escapades
reduced as common ****** meme
mostly I did merrily wet
whet aye ever did dream.)

The missus personal trappings
strewn helter skelter
every perilous step fraught
with danger analogous
riding as passenger
with death cab for cutie
'course thy Queen
of denial feigns ignorance
attributes hazardous condition
linkedin with accident prone
little Lord Fauntleroy's
double doppelganger, me
trumpeting pet husband,
her unrequited germane Liebchen
willing to risk life and limb
doting hand and foot
as proper husbandly duties.

He (ahem... me) exhibits drama
whimsically visiting slapstick pantomime
especially pretending to remove sneakers
pulling with all my feeble strength
off little feet of wife
half-heartedly struggling,
lamely denouncing marriage
nevertheless conveying jollity
regarding marital entrapment
er... rather unbridled wedded bliss
constituting fits and starts enduring
about two dozen years.

I reciprocated amorousness,
whether toward MaryAnne,
(his long ago coldly dismissed
sagacious enchanting first paramour,
(half a dozen years my senior),
whose astrological forecast
accurately predicted promising
acquaintanceship/relationship
potential soul mates
(approximately two plus four score years ago -
gone to naught),
which latter aforementioned humble lass

decried he fomented
incessant emotional grief,
he cruelly (albeit unwittingly)
doled out nothing
but lackluster lovelessness
attributed to identical
zodiac signs (Capricorn)
(matter of fact shared same birth date
January 13th - six years age difference)
stubborn misconstrued perception,
whereby fancy free and footloose
selfish nasty short brute nevertheless
deemed himself loutish
undeserving of love - humph!

Addeneum: Approximately four decades
re: one quarter century after
aforementioned baptismal initiation
love stricken  paroxysm
forty fifth president of United States
took (i.e. plagiarized) many pages courtesy,
cruel playbook authored
by fella pseudonym self named Jane A. Rug,
who left trail of heartbroken sage woman
commander in chief deliberately stoked,
née sparked long
simmering smoldering, and stewing
long festering white supremacist altercation
fiendishly igniting racial conflagration
exploding during late spring 2020.

No matter no child left behind kibitzing
(yours truly as boy plucked petals
off daisy reciting "she loves me,"
"she loves me not"...
cupid loosed an arrow
into boyhood neighborhood sweetheart
she innocently bespoke
"I wanna marry you,"
when uttered courtesy Sherry Jones,
a little girl who lived
approximately three doors down
along cul-de-sac within Apple Valley

perpendicular to Lantern Lane,
or more age apropos,
when young gallivanting
purported vestal ****** ladies
nonverbally signalled
libidinal proclamations of emancipation,
as demurely expressed
lest unlucky (chaste into)
precocious ******* proclivity
suffered the punishment
of being buried alive.

Now back to present day,
when our old geezer,
the prototype garden variety
male of present poem -
any resemblance between general referenced
fella and living persons purely coincidental.

He (yours truly) easily qualified as
overly cocky whippersnapper,
i.e. young buck and/or Casanova wannabe
experienced bit torrent
hormonal secretions gushed
particularly in close proximity
wherein wafted pheromones -
think a waif faring ingénue.

As evident and quite obvious,
I fabricate (prevaricating
my signature trademark)
rather than stating bland reality stark,
yet will plainly explain issue
in summary essential rhyme
without reason constitutes
nothing more spectacular than
garden variety generic pockmark
excised pustule ofttimes hallmark
of teenage/ pubescent pimply benchmark.
Early morning April 8th, 2020
meteorologic destiny manifested...
rumbling atmospheric thuds,
promised natural exultant
sound and light show
subsequently within minutes
dully rightly appraised as dud,

yours truly forced himself awake
way before dawn's early light
all for naught, yet...
thus hours later summoned,
perhaps lame poetic material
(think) potential Earth shaking
literary cause not lost

expressing disappointment
'pon absent dramatic booming anticipation,
electrifying fascination, injecting glorification
atavistic beastie boy within me
awed, charged, fascinated, jarred,
witnessing (i.e. seeing and hearing)
humbling experience beholding

dynamic latent forces unleashed
intense earsplitting, blinding
spectacular singular sensational
magnificent natural phenomena
far surpassing, née dwarfing
extravagant pyrotechnics wrought
courtesy innovative **** sapiens.

Time and again
without fail - exuberant delight
always gushes forth,
no fanfare for
totally tubular common man,
whose feeble insignificant powers
laughable and lamentable

puny human specimen
easily flicked (think
humongous sized fingers
particularly middle digit)
sending me airborn
pirouetting head over heels
at mercy of Mother Nature's whims

among brethren and sistren
constituting fray'n chipped
foo fighting ship of
motley crew zing fools
metaphorical human league
bajillion **** sapiens
even if/when global

standing military combined
be they: armies, marines,
navies... fighting force
nope, still no match
against tectonic and volcanic
potential and/or kinetic energy.
Radical planet friendly measures
equals earning kudos as unsung hero
(think environmental footprint)
nearly absolute zero
while global population quarantine
suspension of civil rights
would never fly with trumpeting pharaoh.

Since United States economically crippled
(as well rest of world wide web)
courtesy coronavirus fallout rippled
analogous, whereby Mother Earth
(Gaia's) motley crew psyches stippled.

Golden nugget opportunity whence
twenty first century man/womankind
can make figurative about face
humanity undergoes tense
fossil fuel powered civilization

intricate tapestry doth unwind
(COVID-19) wreaking havoc
among flu fighting village people
constituting human race
shifting radical paradigm

toward renewable resources
alas me dogmatic karma credit
thinks green new deal
(Paine fully) common sense
to any doubting Thomas

since global governments
currently flattened, gutted,
hobbled, immobilized, jackknifed
martial law restricts
impugns verity capitalistic

(re: cannibalistic planetary exploitation)
acquiescing higglety pigglety
free for all
(Alfred E. Neuman wannabes) madcap
(spy versus spy chase

explicit green lighting
global (fiery red) desecration rents
linkedin multitude innocent
flora and fauna violently asunder
ethos predicated upon

vandalistic, monopolistic, capitalistic...
manifest destiny codas enshrined
no matter indigenous tribes genocide
horrifically did erase
place names benign injustice

underestimates true value
native peoples legacy
impossible mission feebly
conjuring ****** events
sacred treaties scotched, revoked, quashed...

accentuating death sentence signed
obliterating rightful heirs amazing grace
storied proud nations traduced
as agents provocateur
cruelly prodded to adopt

offense and/or defense
inevitably pushed off their sacred lands
today their abysmal existential nihilistic crisis
crushing, damning, punishing... poverty
testament how third eye blind
turned away s as to avoid witnessing
tears for fears etching staind face.
103 · Sep 2024
I stand proud with pride...
exuding suave debonair air
plus head and shoulders taller
(than the empire state building -
hey what's a little hyperbole, eh?)
since September eleventh
two thousand and twenty four,
which date marked a major change
(yes folks - more important
than getting married)

during threescore and two years
incorporating mein kampf
voluntarily (and without bribery,
but with liberty and justice for all)
to maintain a scheduled appointment
at Salon Nova,
an upscale hair cutting/styling boutique
located at 377 W Ridge Pike A,
Limerick, Pennsylvania 19468.

This recently unkempt
aging married sexagenarian
and solitudinarian sultan of swing
long haired pencil neck geek
self adopted behavior modification
particularly regarding maintaining
personal hygiene of mine
woke as if from somnambulant state
and kept promise to himself.

About twelve inches of brown tresses
got cut off courtesy in a small number
of fell swoops videre licet,
whereby the beautician
amazingly gracefully brandished scissors and brush
immediately creating lightness of being
which locks of brunette strands
tinged with gray
got donated to a charity
that repurposes hair

into wigs for various
and sundry purposes,
thus empowered
to contribute a part of myself
that will grow back -
(yet... I WILL NOT GO BACK
thank you Kamala Harris for birthing phrase
TO PRESENTING SLOVENLY APPEARANCE)
in gentle waves
cascading down to my knees
as happened umpteen times

during mein kampf,
the first instance
of revolutionary physical transformation
occurred when yours truly
a mere stripling of a pubescent teen
receiving psychiatric treatment
from Ted Goldberg,
(who prescribed both mellaril and elavil),
and he patiently nursed psyche of mine
severely afflicted with anorexia nervosa

in tandem with
obsessive compulsive disorder
tied with exaggerated fixation with hair,
which characteristic donning my noggin
became the most important reason for living,
I would sooner have died than get a haircut,
(spoiler alert, I did not die nor **** myself),
yet interestingly enough
he accompanied me
to a local barber in Collegeville,

who did the deed done dirt cheap,
yet I invariably returned to being
a long haired pencil neck geek
plodding along the boulevard of broken dreams,
where according to Fiona Apple
The Idler Wheel Is Wiser
Than the Driver of the *****
and Whipping Cords Will Serve You
More Than Ropes Will Ever Do.

All kidding aside,
said voluntary makeover undertaken
cause unnecessary emotional energy
and quite a chunk of time
invested lavishly shampooing hirsute pate,
and subsequently applying blow dryer
to fluff up ample mane,
that gnarly retched ma tailbone - ha!

Another significant reason
spurring long overdue decision
to present a handsome chap,
albeit modesty prevents excessive
self adulation, ******* (not premature),
ego inflation, amplitude
and attitude modulation of same
to disallow being snickered at
as if I happen to be from Mars.

Sorry keeping a figurative straight face
impossible mission for this word punster,
jokester, and grandmaster without a super plan.

Yours truly (me) made long overdue transition
from schlep to mensch
In an attempt to recount how life came about on planet Earth,
thence subsequently spanning across the webbed wide world
birthed cockamamie idea within mind of then young Matthew
Scott Harris, who knew nothing about Charles Darwin Origin
of Species controversial revolutionary annunciation with much
excitation videre licet painstakingly slow process of evolution,
where over the course of billions of years origin of life became
as told to him tongue in cheek courtesy his kibitzing father and
mother manifest hoodwinked him (said boy gullibly prone to
accept gospel that every object in the sky peopled unwittingly
complement Harris mad scientist, (who spent substantial years
self sequestered - much like writer of these words) fabricating
in retrospect far out and groovy improbable hypotheses about
Norwegian bachelor farmer, who in an attempt to make powder
milk biscuits, put the ingredients in the refrigerator and absent
mindedly forgot about them until unusual noises heard distinctly
linkedin within invention to keep perishables frozen or cold - a
constant almost rhythmic rattle & hum eventually drew curious 
resident of Lake Woebegone, and supposed missing link within
genealogical family tree, which ostracized forebear unwittingly
created perfect magnetic force field environment where steely
sons of ******* outliers from outer limits of the twilight zone
not unlike the Jetsons (a fictional family from animated sitcom
of same name ineluctably pulled (usually against their will) said
television show aired in the1960s, and viewed by none other than
yours truly me as a rather quiet natured keenly observant little boy
ofttimes looking toward the heavens displaying inscrutable mien
dumbfounded look, whose furrowed brow contemplating expanse
undermined with puzzlement where multitudinous pinpoints of
light extended far into dark shadows unbeknownst to me childlike
wonder, & even mind boggling to one sexagenarian regarding deep
space comprising bajillion stars and stripes of various and sundry
animals and plants occupied where according to current scientific
understanding, the cosmos, or universe, is primarily composed of
three main components: normal matter (about 5%), dark matter
(around 27%), and dark energy (approximately 68%); with dark
matter and dark energy (drink) being the dominant constituents,
although their exact nature the stuff of an overactive imagination
such as mine conjured entities (especially more substantial when
edge of night crept across patch of property housed domain with
the address 2701 Lantern Lane, Audubon, Pennsylvania where
curious kid spent approximately the first half dozen years of his
life and hard time, and said residence I espied while returning
back to Schwenksville after the missus underwent minor routine
treatment (liquid nitrogen sprayed atop a dot over each to brow)
to stave off any potential future more serious issue with skin.
which achievement, deportment,
endorsement, and indictment
(more serious than rigging an election)
jump/kickstarts (a divine comedy of errors)
not reason enough
to be deported),
but necessitates more than a facile effort
linkedin to a working knowledge
of familial genetics ofttimes

discovering, revealing, and unearthing
locked up figurative ghosts in the closet,
and/or shocking insights
courtesy vis a vis mapping lineage
of descendents whose deferment
being proactive when deciding
with absolute zero or
very little shadow of a doubt
versus someone analogous

to yours truly (me),
who offtime fumferes concerning
the course of action one will
assertively, decidedly, and proactively take
and keep to their word,
whether the issue in question
rather classed as superficial,
I will iterate after writing
a particular for instance as follows.

When asked (courtesy the missus)
if I ever plan to use the new hair brush
purchased at CVS a short time after
getting substantial lovely locks clipped,
yours truly responded
"when my hair gets long again"
despite promising myself
that donning the guise
of a baby boomer
long haired pencil neck geek
got nipped in the bud,
but subsequently (hypocritically)
explaining to her
the necessity to practice making excuses
lest one forget the delicate art
to thwart due diligence
to maintain irresoluteness.

Whether avoiding taking
figurative bull by the horn stance,
(particularly risky business
if one happens to be
the matador enraging
a monster red eyed bull
by waving red cape
in front of said animal -
analogous to Ke-mo sah-bee)
or evading asking Bill Thurman,
a portly non ambulatory resident
here at Highland Manor,

(whose Tuxedo patterned therapy feline
one of the most common coat colors
for shelter kitties -
a bicolor also called piebald cat  
with white fur combined
with fur of some other colour,
for example, solid black, tabby,
or colour pointed named Corbin
an affectionate loveable kitty,
who administers love bites),
who rightfully owes me five dollars

for asking me to clean his carpet,
but hate to remind said person,
cuz he promised to pay me,
and would rather
he square the marginal debt
(rather than triangulate him
by circling round the issue courtesy the missus)
of his own volition,
and thus resorted
to communicate with him telepathically,
and perchance a whim will prompt him

to leave a voice
and/or text message
gently coaxing poet of Perkiomen Valley (me)
to lend him a helping hand
such as withdrawing cash
from an ATM machine
or whisking boxes away
to be recycled or reused
at Liberty Thrift store or Worthwhile
offering perfect opportunity
to jog his memory nonchalantly.
but much to my relief, said mandatory inquisition (rather inspection) will take place sixty nine days later (due the math and inform me of any error if applicable), which date will be March 28, 2025.

My entire body electric went into system of the down mode after mistakenly presuming that the triumvirate would loudly rap on our apartment door (B44 in case ye happen to inquisitive). As a result yours truly and the missus knuckled and buckled down into high gear furiously scrambling to complete some grunt work, and tossing out recyclables ***** nilly plus bagged tempe intended for a future meal of mine.

At 0700 hours (indicated
courtesy notification slipped under door
less than twenty four hours)
hence foretold ill fate
by property (crooks and quade) management
the head honcho zaftig, kathleen bergen -
no nickname for her yet
(who replaced ******),
and Rich (text depeche mode) the snitch
at highland manor apartments
re: looming eviction implication
cuz yours truly and the missus
out of compliance
namely unkempt living space
within the walls of apartment b44
after residing within
said low income facility
going on eight years July first
two thousand and twenty five,
we experienced ongoing contention here,
which palpable tension
crackles, pops, and snaps
across the webbed wide world.

Courtesy social media platforms
in tandem with reputable poetry websites
allows, enables and provides
analogous soapbox to vent
after above identified triumvirate
done scrutinizing, interrogating, castigating...

Me and the missus
immediately sprung into action
rather each of our separate nervous systems
underwent uncontrollable bouts
of expansion and contraction,
(where we both
made a beeline for the bathroom)
analogous to severe toothache
necessitating oral surgeon extraction.

Three days later - January 21st, 2025
signals the visitation of inquisition
(cue ominous music)
obscure artificial illumination
looming dark shadows
presaging worse fate than death
rivaling close encounters of the third kind
outer limits of the twilight zone
monstrous sinister forbidding shapes
blotting sunlight plunging
highland manor apartment in total darkness.

Hence aforementioned feeble SOS
cuz our rented one bedroom unit
b44 not in ship shape,
thus me and the wife
not happy campers
(still in shell shock
after seeing the unexpected notice)
possibly forced to live in a tent
among bunch of other homeless people
along skidrow,
thus fruitless effort to yield
and appeal to top banana
figuratively precariously perched
on horns of dilemma
spurred me to posit supposition,
whereby sympathy for the devil witnesses
greater likelihood versus wordsmith
unsuccessfully, nevertheless creatively
blindsiding anonymous readers
spellbound to empty ***** nilly
bajillions of dollars
from their pocketbooks
and mail blank checks to yours truly
before coming to their collective
sense and sensibility bound with
pride and prejudice.
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