Minimally impacts mine secluded lifestyle,
cuz yours truly came into this madcap world
approximately 534714.57958 times after
gnomon cast shadow across flat plate of sundial
ever since being a little boy, I throve while
existence kept me in solitude, thus isolation trial

directly linkedin with pandemic necessitates
sparse human contact, yea analogous to an exile
punishment far removed, quarantined, condemned...
and essentially metaphorically banished necessitating
befriending self as best beastie boy bad company
where madding crowd hashtagged insync existing

within territory hostile currying aversion to socialize
worse fate than being eaten
alive (with one chomp) savored
by token smiling crocodile
absentmindedly pitching
head over heels into... state of denial

after out running a tribe
of 10,000 aboriginal maniacs,
hence out distancing latter only to buzzfeed former
whose absence not noticed, until long in the tooth
(actually between 60 and 72 teeth) said reptile
captured and subsequently dissected (I'll)
spare telling thee gory details

though amazingly well preserved ****** profile
comprising fully intact features
exhibiting me eternally frozen cunning guile,
nevertheless greater excitement arose
at similarity between former poetaster
and La Brea Tar Pits fossilized dinosaur kin
especially their respective coat
of armor ironic steely iambic style.

Bajillion banshees scream ****** ****** methought
upon Biblical (lionized) forebears stalking heads
birthed courtesy accursed beasts hood besought
winds howl across the oblate spheroid
methinks courtesy **** sapiens horror wrought.

Climate change/global warming siren song
Adam event since time immemorial against
sacred covenant doing Mother Nature wrong
April 21st waning hours warn us King Kong
antithetical, egotistical, & heretical caretakers
over populated quintessential rowdy sinning
rawbit & powdermilk biscuit munching throng.

Antiestablishmentarian gambit voiced, I tootle
(albeit figuratively), and feign playing trumpet
challenging when born with submucous palate
lamely feeble attempt made tinkering with words
aware crushing humanity legacy takes Herculean

effort to implement global revolution, staging &
coaching proselytizers to shine klieg lights where
industrialization tattooed unseemly sights land
once (unimaginably) pristine acres irrevocably
repurposed into grotesque disfigured terra firma.

Fifty years ago come
the morrow witnessed zee
first metaphorical telescoping
lens zooming close
far more horrible than
"fake" special effects we
as collective species
impacted planet harkening
back when nasty, short
and brutish proto humans

mastered steely ironic
mettle to fell one after tree
after another, I need
not axe the question if queasy
induced state imagined
envisioning yourself, née
Pandora's box (purported
inventiveness) suddenly vaulted
and unhinged inkling,
when beastie boys plus goo

goo dolls loosed goods
no longer under lock & key
i.e. raw materials to fashion,
whatever struck fancy
re: innately "gifted"
descendent afforded momentary
recognition (nameless
naked apes) that hit upon idea
way manifold generations
before iconic light bulb lit

western civilization taming
current of (ohm my dog)
flow of electrons to supply
amply charging electricity
countless intervenvening
millennium one after another
survival of the fittest likely
accidentally melded insight
with (then) near infinite
natural resources labored away.

Unbeknownst, when chance
cerebral serendipity gave way
where inchoate deliberation,
how ardent smarts applied today
gave dawn of consciousness
quantum leap launching landlubbers
****** into the seven seas eventually
marshalling routes to unknown,

nevertheless pirated quay
zee whirled wide watery web
long ago hushing nay
saying doubting Thomas
(English muffin chomping chap),
especially at financing
and cost courtesy bourgeoisie
yacht ta yacht ta yacht ta.

Disposition tilts dogma of poetaster
elicits, nevertheless adopting role jester
trending toward vagueness exhibited
by Addams family uncle Fester.

Yours truly makes exception to his
preference for law and order, viz
sanctioning upheaval particularly
avast mayhem curried kindled, biz
zee ness linkedin courtesy divine ****
hard re: coronavirus (COVID-19).

Oh...just a slight digression duration
approximately no longer than left
middle, or... right third eye blind blink
a show of hands via augmented and/or
virtual reality who recall children's pink
cuss Zuckerman lyrics, I roundly think

nonsense verse skidda marinky dinky ****
though a curmudgeonly fella, a catchy tune
me and the boys (at taproom) sing up drink
dated to more apropos synchronize Asia *****
lets the sunshine, thru trumpeting don vizier
touting America upon self destructive brink

allowing, enabling, and providing participation
within convenience er... rather forced lockdown
yet safely and soundly sequestered blame ratfink
microscopic organism (alluded 17) lines above
pitching capitalistic qua Laissez faire economy.

Accordance to crude Dickensian nostrildamus
whose predictions noted for reference to nose
everything about hmm... sax and violins crows
excitedly (pretend ye did not read orgasmically)
as United States of America pushed to breaking
into bajillion pieces metaphorically, aye suppose

executive, judicial, & legislative colluding bozos
feigning, grinning, hobnobbing... arrogant beastie
boys and goo goo dolls sporting snazziest custom
tailored (swiftly) made harried styled fancy clothes
at taxpayers expense of course, but more important
exerting Republican driven power to deprive Negroes

constitutional right to vote
namely i.e. disenfranchisement
especially upcoming 2020
presidential election woes
rendered manifold times
more challenging populace
up in arms vehemently

protesting prolonged quarantine
scrawling, sketching, &
striking garish noir
artist's rendition arrows
(albeit broken) corruptly,
lamentably, pathetically politicos
hell bent upending cradle holding
what dead souls Lord Knows...?

Analogous whim didst flit hither
and yon to & fro within
noggin (mine), the following
representation you envision
whereby governmental representatives
dead set declawing,
maiming, née destroying
Bald Eagle Great Seal symbolizing
The eagle head turned

towards olive branch, on right side,
to symbolize preference for peace.
In beak, eagle clutches
a scroll with motto E pluribus unum
("Out of Many, One"),
The Olive branch and arrows
denote power of peace &
war which exclusively vested in Congress.

clothes washing Sunday courtesy the missus

Ah... the highlight of our supposed, linkedin,
designated day of respite after a week toiling
away with ennui, yes reader a tower mountain
(rivalling Himalaya's 29,029 foot range), oozes

odoriferous tendrils suffuse every square inch
within entire drab one bedroom apartment, but
invariably contribute to climate changing/global
warming), said domestic chore indulged with a

burst of fervent excitement (competing making
long day's journey into night long to retrieve the
requisite communication with outside webbed
wide world) bring joie de vivre je ne sais quois
weekly highlight to thyself vaccinated courtesy

(against adversity), and valued tough as (nine
inch) nails missus vaunted as Xena, methinks,
she exaggerates bajillion fold dubbing me with
appellation as herr (germane) Hercules, a miss
gnome er, I no longer nitpick amidst these most

challenging times where coronavirus COVID-19
(ironic violent crime plus environmental abuse
nearly absolute zero) engendering loyalty, high
fidelity, assiduity among madding crowd I (a runt
of mill garden variety generic doubting Thomas)

kin Hardy believe me myopic sudden inexplicable
camaraderie between and betwixt ordinary folks,
no matter, we (doddering, hobbling, & kickstarting)
long time married couple (seems like millenniums)
revel when washing clothes occasion arises, despite

modern time saving contrivances (washer and dryer)
available, but all monies larded out to buzzfeed icky
persnickety, rickety,... temperamental wishy washy
machines quickly (said cash & or cache automatically
line silver) pockets of Grosse and Quade, them iz zee

who own living facility here: 2 Highland Manor, yet
purportedly (according to rumor mongers aim to sell
property for fair market price) - just in case ye dear
reader seek to sink (literally) x dollars into formerly
owned Mars redoubt, and once upon time wetlands.

Truth be told said topic minimally embellished
rather, prattling youthful looking
baby booming geezer
precious time (yours), he doth bilk
(cue sinister mock-up halloween voice)

moost valuable intangible
outstripping fine spun golden silk,
yet coronavirus (COVID-19) quarantine
drives dingbat to whole new level
wits end where sonar helps sound out his ilk.

Think me swallowing, gulping, and asphyxiating
essential experiencing ill humor versus zest
suddenly impossible mission life and death quest
in short oxygen with air supply
depleted blame climate change
analogous to getting trachea

severely pelted, pinched, pressed
nevertheless, I limber twigs to build a nest
simultaneously (choking, gagging, and laughing)
appeasing the impractical joker within/without
lame impersonation suave debonair beau geste
and pardon following hyperbole expressed.

More onerous (ha) to parish priests
tendering, regarding and administering last rites
aforementioned "fake" dead serious claim,
one little known prevaricator doth attest
(nip pulling excess milk of human kindness)

faux (pas and mine late ma)
gaming altruism confessed
***** deeds done dirt cheap
hypothetically earning devout resuscitator
invoking divine intervention
upon impious hackneyed poetaster brownie points.

Now fur heal, aye really gotta
get get something off me chest
flagrant exaggerated golden opportunity analogous,
videre licet his achievements or service to country

warrants life experiences to entail electronic knighthood,
and/or his female counterpart secularly baptized
bitta bing bitta bang fiber optically blessed
communication courtesy poetry offers level best
modality as ye will subsequently attest.

Here, now be my (virtual and/ augmented) guest
to experience former don requisite paraphernalia
quite sophisticated electronics even average
Luddite would be impressed
i.e. headsets loaded with gyroscopes and other
sensors to track movements and similar

accouterments for latter lest
please take swig and/or slug at my behest,
yours truly boasts nutritious 100% vegan zest,
oh... afterwards use greensleeve (mine), I jest
to wipe tell tale residue (i.e. milk mustache)
off your mug that gulped
farce syrup passing electric kool aid acid taste test.

Earlier today (April 18th, 2020)
a novel notion came into mine pate
to craft poem regarding titled subject
i.e. fyi Google Califia Farms
satisfactorily to investigate

or visit https://www.califiafarms.com/ to satiate
curiosity a boot plant based healthy drink to locate
nearest purveyor, an
immediate convert ye will become
preaching the gospel gushing enthusiasm will not abate
subsequently yours truly
able, eager, ready and willing to debate.

Circa April 17th, 2120, or 1820 military time,
yours truly attempted crafting id est feeble rhyme
far from madding crowd, nevertheless yet lovely
bones and flesh quite spry, still considered prime
(moost procreative, prodigious, and progressive)

stage, since (case ye didn't know) approximately
eight score orbitz round Earth's sun still noontime
chronologically analogous to protracted lunchtime
whereat the average offspring jetson or (daughter)

Born twenty years into twenty second century alive
and well (still hashtagged as precocious) with drive
to safely, sidestep, and surmount establishmentarian
archaic, formulaic, and mosaic Judaic/Christian give
wry master of words (me) take poetic license to jive
reasonably rhyming nope heart tickle early misthrive

moost definitely ***** deeds done dirt cheap (trick)
super tramping space cowboy lobbing power-drive
re: frequently innocent prelapsarian double entendre
(Jean Jacques Rousseau) Noble Savage he doth strive
even though hanky panky tinged entire his/her story,
**** sapiens animal husbandry hastily did wive.

Bajillion years after proto humans experienced woe
countless figurative early Brady bunched bro doggie
dimples encountered necessity to escape cohabitation
(marital covenant alien), yet quasi marital brouhaha
ofttimes witnessed altercation begetting re: thorough

out baby with bath water phenomena, which literal
cruel fate heavily peppered past (mine) accounting
lamely explaining Pink Floyd momentary status quo
upended accompanied courtesy lapse of reason no

definitive evidence to substantiate claim, yet I know
without shadowed doubt every friggin forebear (***
pining to savor manumission, versus cotton pickin)
back breaking stoop labor think indentured escrow
harking back to days of our lives (mainly bonobo

nasty, short and brutus creatures millenniums ago
unsung simian kindred beings suffering figurative
ruffled horse feathers nsync with bird in hand dodo
which latter species long extinct (as Dutch good eats)

now non sequitur (sea quitter) mine homeboys/girls
comprising Harris eventual clan (of craven lionized
"scapegoats" set genealogical precedent, and grew
some real winners gentiles, who commingled and
intermarried, and united proudly to kvetch as Jew)

eventually acquiring redeeming qualities conveniently
best caricatured as features exhibited by Mister MaGoo
invariably dear reader "fake" anecdote ye will poo poo
as well how storied and fabled coronavirus (COVID-19)

medical technicians reference quaint pandemic setting
figurative global stage brethren and sistern microbes
made webbed, wide world wish for said good ole days
cuz, communique done being crafted about six hours

marine hated, armies of beastie boys slain 2120 yahoo
the darndest, latest microscopic bugaboo nearly slew
entire population, hence envision terra firma with
divine providence absolute zero people as edenic
provenance (metaphorically offering tabula rasa view.

Though mentally, physically,
and spiritually healthy... ****
hood dolled logy
hoop fully, ideally, joyfully...
unannounced twill be mine death
without forewarning thine

grand finale allocated breath
best surprise visit me
(without reason nor rhyme)
ye grim reaper, when mine
sands of time spell season
bound to thee afterlife
existence null and void treason

legitimately ******* up...
attested zee pitiful wreckage
emotionally/psychologically
scarred upon exiting stage
within throes of puberty,
now smoldering with livid rage
against corporeal complex edifice
forever scotched page

indelibly etched since
childhood's end, I surmise stunted
(albeit physically, but
much greater severity
social development quashed,
milestones acquired courtesy
dating forewent, aye gauge.

Mine youthfulness prized
and cherished, understandable
against transforming into
winded, withered, and wizened
decrepit senior citizen
plagued with incontinence I balk,

especially if lovely bones
though become fragile as chalk
quasi (figurative) eraserhead
accentuating folks to gawk
one redeeming quality
yours truly gifted with eye of hawk

plus uncanny ability
to screech (think sharp nails scraping
across blackboard), where
captive audience doth squawk
gleeful yours truly (unfortunate
trounced scapegoat) dishes, doles, and dumps
lavish portions vicious bullies

bittersweet just desserts courtesy nasal talk
(mine), cuz I got cursed as mutant
with submucous cleft palate
split uvula evident approximately
same time I learned to walk.

Ah... whence yours truly no longer
linkedin among livingsocial
aging baby boomer rang body electric
haggard and weatherworn
analogous to old matted (Scottish)
cherished overcoat good and
plenti patched, ripped, tattered and torn

perfect as many an ideal schmatte
(Yiddish pronunciation SHmädə)
enshrouding me of corpse
rigor mortis granting freedom
acquired once consciousness
avidly, decidedly, gladly..., shorn,
corporeal flesh repurposed,

relinquished, and reincarnated reborn
metaphorically witnessing vibrant
unparalleled transcendent splendour
nsync with awakening within Edenic morn...
suddenly knowing eternal salvation
(angst axed avowed atheist attests)
will forever end feeling forlorn,

no particular explanation nursery rhyme
Jimmy crack corn
and I don't care
came to mind only willing
anticipating permanent relief
vamoose psychological distress
since day I got born.