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Matalie Niller Mar 2013
Sometimes, all the times
I pretend you are here
to wake up and smile the sun to life-
I imagine you beside me
close enough that I needn't move to kiss your hair
you're already there
eager to just be
with me
and the day
and though nothing else matters
not the space nor the place
but just your face
your hands and lips of course
it's nice to know
that you can take part
in experiencing everything with me
such as the ways
that air molecules fill our room
bursting with energy
and the pieces of furniture
are gathered round to see such a sight
two silly humans
becoming crazier and crazier
about each other
one another
and on those days we can't be together
I just remember
you are in this world existing so beautifully
and my mind may rest a bit more easily
Matalie Niller Mar 2013
I see you on beautiful days
the kind that make your heart stop and your mind take mental pictures,
when the sun is setting just rightly enough
that shadows are long but the day isn't sad because it's ending,
merely continuing its natural cause-
you are in those shadows,
your figure mirrored in their calm, lenghty presence
and in the words of the birds
speaking joyfully-
it's you they gossip and sing for.
The little fragments of light on the water
when the wind hits it like a painting
those are your eyes
your smile
the gentle paper noise of the leaves on their branches
that is your voice
speaking to me in a way nobody else has ever tried
a different language
all our own.
You're in the air itself
so clear and cool and mind numbingly brilliant
it's all you
even miles and hours apart
even while you're doing your actions and I'm completing my routine
and even when I feel lonely without you to enjoy such a wonderful sight
you are already here,
to selflessly make the sensations of existence just that much better.
Matalie Niller Mar 2013
How soon is too soon
to dance under the moon
stars for angels
your eyes the reason to smile
or are they the reason for all the positives ever?
Quitely so
I like you a lot
more than you realize,
and not so much you-
your role in this physical 3D world
or even your actions, words
but mostly just the sum total
of all you have been, are becoming
the energy you unknowingly give me
an essence I suppose
of someone greater than man
aand yes you are one
a **** fine specimen to be exact
but it's as if I am subliminally attracted
to your very existence
on a level that makes me believe in a God
in beautiful souls,
yours being the most divine
and I can feel it
the moment it enters a room
near or far
anywhere in the world
I know that you Are,
your physical self holding all that is You
and every second is made more perfect, serene
because you are gracing this world
with your being that is so right
I am willing, no grateful for the chance
to be vulnerable to such a person,
bow in your presence,
feel all you are
and to offer up all I have
to make you happy, prove my worth
and in the moments we are together
I can assure you
all the atoms in my body freeze,
my heart becomes still
for you have such a calming affect
that all I can do is smile
and hope to all that is in the universe
that I may somehow give you
as much happiness
as you selflessly give me.
Matalie Niller Feb 2013
May I just say
That you are more lovely
More imaginative
Than any I have ever experienced;
You put the D in my Day
The smile on my laugh
Make me feel all kinds of silly
As if falling
Down a wonderful hole
And I keep falling and falling
And just when I think I’ve reached some sort of destination
You appear
And the journey continues
And we fall together
Because nobody else is around,
It’s just me and you
And our tumbles of ridiculous words
Not knowing which way is up
But it’s ok
Because as long as you’re by my side
Touching my fingers
Breathing the same existence
I know it’s ok to be me and to be us
And to be
And it’s beautiful,
Knowing you’re in this world
Walking its planes, seeing its glory
And it makes my ribs feel like they’re expanding with all of the sun’s light,
Stars in your mouth
And it’s alright
To lose time and money and energy
Because with you
All is found.
Matalie Niller Dec 2012
it's been done
sharing the fate
times and goes
like a campfire
smoky and wonderful
but it has to be washed out of hair
smell far too intrusive
exclusive sighs and thighs
couldn't stop you if I wanted to
but who would?
not even the saddest or the maddest,
the crazies or the foolish
it would be simply unethical
downright wrong
to deny such attempts
such thoughts
because in the beauty of beauty
it's the **** best
Matalie Niller Dec 2012
And it's pretty cool
when you're you and I'm me
though I don't know what to say
what could I?
I want to,
say anything at all
if it'll make me feel better about wasting your time,
making you dislike me more
each second that passes
I can only assume
that you are merely humoring my childish attempts and desires
though I'm not entirely sure what they even are,
what I want from you
what you mean
but it's still nice
very enjoyable
so it can be allowed to survive
at least for a while
until it dies
decomposes and I'm forced to face truths
the kinds I hate
though I also want them
because you are just far too intimidating
for me to be around for too long.
Matalie Niller Dec 2012
So what will I do
with a stupid little boy
who won't just think I'm great
when all I want
is to hold his hand?
He should know better,
that I don't just fall for just any old male,
may be attracted,
may even think they're cool,
want to do naughty things,
but to actually feel
that's a new one-
maybe he knows
that my heart feels like a pathetic mess
and gets embarrassingly excited when we speak,
maybe he is fully aware
of the effect he has on me,
how I want him to be happy,
want him to be near
want to sleep beside him
maybe I'm just getting a little ahead of myself,
maybe I only like his kind words and attention
and really
we would not work together at all-
but I don't care,
it feels too good to not want to pursue,
just wish I knew
and that it didn't matter
because there's millions of boys
some probably even better
but for right now
I'm trapped on this one
picking myself apart
hoping for some miracle moment
where he shows up with flowers
and some deep poetry ****
and I can be
like a little girl from the tv
beautiful and perfect
and the sun will set more beautifully than ever before.
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