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Matalie Niller Dec 2012
Ooh you make me
So frustrated
With myself
But it should be you
That I want to punch
Because
It’s hard to read
You,
I want to,
Just know what you’re thinking
About my existence
And speaking with you,
If you get the silly feelings
Smile randomly throughout the day
Because you know the other is doing something somewhere,
But I can’t know such things
You won’t tell
Perhaps you have nothing to say,
And it’s all in my head
This thing I want to call a maybe us
And really
We’re just two people
In the world-
But really
I can’t accept that
Because really
You’ve made me happier
Than any other ******* I’ve met
In a long, long
Ever.
Matalie Niller Dec 2012
Come on over and see for yourself
What 30 years of long nights
Faster than the speed of speed
Crack can break your mother’s pride
Lungs like bubbles
Used to be lovely
Now nothing but a sorry sight
For any eyes
Especially mine
Wouldn’t like to look upon
Empty skull of a used to be person
And see only
A lifetime of poor decisions
And a desire for peace of mind
Never satisfied.
Matalie Niller Dec 2012
Oh,
If love were an option
A yes or a no
If it were perhaps a choice that a person may allow
Once they reached the legal age to love and be loved
I would run away
From such a decision
Because it is too much of a life sentence
Too much to feel,
To be so dependent on another
To need and to be so admiring
That I believe I would become violently ill
Every moment that I awoke from my loveless slumber
And become a robot
Capable of only positivity
And I know
That I can belong only to myself.
Matalie Niller Dec 2012
Dear you
Why are you so sad?
You must know
How absolutely magnificent you are,
How when you look at me
I believe
Space shatters
Because the molecules in the air between us get tighter,
They can sense your immense
Whatever the hell you are,
How ******* amazingly you exist
There
Everywhere you go,
You’re you
And it makes me proud
To say I know
The most interesting
Perfect man
Who breathed the same air as the unworthies.
Matalie Niller Dec 2012
Little lively lovelies
Sitting in a tree
What do you see?
Does the planet look so different
Ten feet higher?
I can get up there,
Conspire, desire
Want to be
In the trees
Where the beautiful things
Open their beautiful wings
And don’t even fall
When they jump for joy
But live in the sky
Like wonderful moving paintings
Of color and form
Just a swarm
Of frenzy in a new degree.
Matalie Niller Dec 2012
Could I be
Your little lady?
Don’t have to tell
Anyone at all
Just want to be
Yours and yours
And nobody else’s
I can keep secrets
Would like to be one of yours
Although I’d want to shout it
To random people in streets,
From the furthest star from this point of the universe
That I belong
Wholly and 100%
To you.
Matalie Niller Dec 2012
What would you think
if today
the sky began to shrink
becoming nothing
until we were no longer protected by a blue blanket
but could only see everything
the universe
no atmosphere
no clouds
just all that truly is
lightyears away
stars and galaxies would cheer
for our courage,
our unprecedented step into the fearful truth
and we'd laugh
because it's not so scary
when all is revealed
to be nothing more
than better than you could have ever imagined.
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