It hurts knowing that I've never heard you say you loved me.
That you never were proud of me for anything I tried to do for you.
I was the one who always tried and give you credit when you would scream and yell for nothing
Making mom cry and hide.
You never taught us anything like a father should.
All I got out of you was knowing you hated your life and everything in it.
I never leave my room when your home cause all I get is yelled at
Consent name calling
You mumbling terrible words that you knew I could hear
I wish I had a father
Cause I don't know who you are
A man who live in my house that has no name.
I've given up on trying with you
Walking pass you at home and having no connection hurts
Cause I always wanted a dad I could talk to and laugh with
Call daddy
Feel like if I got hurt he would come to the rescue
and save the day
Guess I'll never know what it's like to have that
Cause after all you never put any affort into being a father to any of your children
Or a good husband
I think moms the only reason I stay
She more brave then anyone I know
I guess I win in having such a wonderful person to keep me going when it gets hard.
When you would yell and scream at me
She would try and make you turn to her so I wouldn't have to take it.
I guess that's why I took to the neighbors dad.
He was always the dad I never had.
Funny.
Good to talk to.
Happy, loved his kids.
I'm sorry that I wasn't a perfect child
I've made mistakes
But I've never told you that I've hated you
I've never said anything disrespectful to you like you have a thousand times to me
I don't think I ever will
Cause I guess I'm not like you
I don't put people down to feel good about myself
I won't never stand in my child's face and yell hurtful words until they couldnt see cause the tears would block out everything.
And I thank god I didn't turn into you
Thank god none of us did.
This was a hard one to write with out crying that's why it's so terrible. Eh.