&@&!?*
B l o w i n g  W  ind and planets from your mouth
Your head fills up like a thunderhead
With candy cane lightning

           Burnt down birthday candle
            Stick o dynamite
                      Feelin alright
                  Fire makes the light
                            In the middle of my fingers
                      Fireworks linger
Until angels come and wave them away
Off into space
The hope of the human race
Floating on radio signals
Short crested waves

Crests that peak in white foam
Plucked by strings
Finger bones
The fool withone hand
Juggles like a pro
Joining the circus when he was twelve
And one fateful day
On the fifteenth of may
A lion had his fingers for dinner
Would you sup with me?
The prince disguised as the pauper
You would I bet
Share my last cigarette
As we balance on a chain linked fence
Trapped in a cage
With only one book
You wouldn't believe
Which one I took

It's break time again
The steam whistle blowing
All hands stop
Stacks of boxes
Not growing

We walk outside
To have a smoke on the wharf
Where grass grows up through concrete
And the sea is green and dark

Hobnail boots ping ping
On metal stairs
Wrinkled scarred hands zip up jackets
Old dogs who know nothing but work
Blow smoke in your face
And call you "boy" in thick accent

They don't scare me like they used to
Because I have cuts on my hands now
From diving over a railing
To save an impatient old man

It seems just when life gets to where you want it
You have a dream about someone
And your jumping over railings
Into the teeth of a cutting board

It seems just when life gets to where you want it
You have a dream about a girl
And your waking up alone in the dark
Drinking water and taking pain pills
Even when nothing really hurts at all

For a
moment

I thought I (love)d you.

It's a tough word, it really is,
when you're sobbing behind a bottle,
bleeding red wine from the corners of your mouth.
It would be simpler to express this sober,
but you know as well as anyone
no one's ever sober anymore.

The inebriates are saying "happy ******* Valentine's Day"
to everyone who decided to break the glass the past year.
The antidepressants are speeding up my heart beat,
praying that this time it'll be my name you're crying about.

Even if it's for the wrong reason.

We make a mess of beautiful things.
We scatter them across our floor like snow.
We lay in beds of pictural dreams
that nobody else but us know.

Moments upon moments of color ring
around our heads as we grow and grow
with grace upon grace held in our hands
like God himself is fighting for our side.

It's funny, I awoke from this dream with such open eyes
and to my surprise it were your eyes that cried.
If anything, it was I who deserved those tears.
We make a mess of beautiful things...

The water looks like the scaled back of a fish
Rippling with  its own quiet iridescence.
I place my hands flat on its surface,
Careful not to disturb the delicate tension,
And feel the lake as if it were one being.
A great mass that breathes in waves,
Catches  sunlight and throws it back just as quick.
The water reaches my lower lip
And my toes lose the bottom.

I am endless.

I am immortal and so is the lake, the green-gold depth
Of which I barely break the surface.
In which time exists only as a gentle ebb.
We have been here forever and will still be here
When everything else has died.

A breeze picks up
I clear my eyes and turn away from land.
My heart is a metronome beating in my ear
As I stretch my arms to meet the small lake-waves,
Joining them in their illusion of greatness.

You threatened to spoil it all
You sweet disaster from the night
Blowing kisses like black magic
The dead lake that never sleeps
I’ll fix that problem of perfection
Though I don’t know just what will happen
Please sir, did I make you go insane?

Eyes go black from outer edges
You retreat inside your shell
A cold bone grips you in the darkness
Your mouth is made of clay
You’re words are taken but
Write me from the grave
Please sir, did I make you go insane?

Number my sins on a list
Take me to the grocers,
Let me buy back a moral
An apple for my evil
Book me in for double
Let the dead take aim
Please sir, did I make you go insane?

Did I make you jump from the window
Break the lock and call you in
The bomb opens like an eyelid
The winter comes on pouring in
Thief that I was, I stole your heart
Yet you kept ticking off the beat
Please sir did I make you go insane?

There are no prayers here
This is where the dead come to sleep
Get up of your knee now
Oh foresaken one
Colour the stars in black
Breathe in a breathe - make it last
Now we'll judge you for your worth

This is the death market
Where disease comes to purchase tokens
The grocers of death
With little smiling faces
Would you like to buy a soul?
How much for a pill box coffin
How much for a child's laugh

Heads stacked up like potatoes
Would you care to buy a few?
A penny for a sinner's lungs
Another for a broken heart
Hands turned up, ready and waiting
Dark magic, it does happen here
Deadly creatures come in weekly
A one stop shop to find despair

The thief that I was,
I stole their souls
Left with mouths gone inside out
These puppets on a string
I'll play with their hearts tonight
A sour note called out in madness
I am still the criminal
Disaster taps his feet and waits
He will have his way tonight

Call a                          doctor/ plumber/ priest
My heart is               broken/ leaking/ deceased
My life is                   worthless/ so much better/ over
I'm going to              **** myself/ tell your wife/ Dover
How could you         leave me/ not know/ lie?
I hope you                return my stuff/ come back/ die
I'll never                   forget you/ forgive you/ go away
I need                        closure/ a DNA test/ to tell you I'm gay
Your                           face/ crotch/ top of your back
Is                                so beautiful/ lumpy/ unusually slack
Your                           ex/ mother/ best friend from school
Always made me      great coffee/ feel inadequate/ drool
I will                           miss you/ **** you/ stalk you forever
That way we can      be friends/ get away with it/ be together
I'm sorry                   you did this/ I did this /we failed
I promise to               pay you/ dye it back/ get you bailed
Please don't               leave me/ show the Polaroids/ write or call

(*delete as appropriate, just delete it all.....)

Everyone is sick of raves except for you.
When you painted your face like a tigers
you forgot that your soul has to match.
My soul matches my face.
I left you behind too, I’ve left so many behind,
I don’t know where I’m going.
You were dead weight but
I miss you
anyhow.