I strike up conversations with the things I want to know
A glance can be enough for me to let my body go
It takes me only minutes to remember where I was
And soon I'm looking back on every single thing I've done
In time I am surrounded by the ghost I left behind
But only to be haunted by the creatures in my mind
I try to tune them out until I cannot anymore
Though they can't tell me anything I haven't heard before
And what a wretched cycle it can be to comprehend
To entertain the thought that you're a story in the end

residue, she switches like
clean plastic circuits under
my fingernails. two minutes
breaking down, all it took.
even moving parts from afar
seem placid. could've sworn
i heard just one of your
heartbeats. could've sworn i
was underwater at one or another
point i'll become lack-
lustre and you can change your
mind. no trace of blame. long
after this fact you'll still be
a recurring theme on the
back of my palm as skin shifts
in colourless hues inside
sleep. no matter which hand
i write with, your name
looks the same. shines.

i bide motion, sit still,
as the earth revolves around
something new.

a moment refines
least of all i, coarse
subdivision of all
second skies, stars,
or nothing, minute
from fall. or fallen
already. asleep for
hours. hope coiled
helplessness around
her wrist, caught my
head. spent days in
space. at least, most
of them. can't help
subduction any same,
another algebra in
stone. collapse like
month's passage. hope
won't speak, every
theory is glowing. a
year dissolves empty,
replacing every field
with stripmalls to
mountains again. a
century forgets regicide.

an eternity later, we
press against the wall
like dust coalescing.
hope strings us up,
couple more
embers in the sky.

In the minds of others, I want us to be viewed as
A starstruck love, a famous and widely dreamed of
Fantasy. The softness of our kisses will echo in their eyes
And they will think, "there is love in that kiss.
There is love in their eyes and in their bodies.
They share the love in their minds and arms."
The fire in our eyes will be an old one,
Strong and mature. The smiles we exchange
Will contain memories that few recognize.
I want to be seen as the luckiest girl in the world,
Because I am. The universe will hear my whisper
When I tell you I love you, and there will be a silent
Cheer for us alone. A whistle from me
And a tear of joy.
I want there to be love in our eyes,
And pain in our hearts.
I want us to be stronger and learn from eachother.
I want to be us  *forever.

it is summer again, and
we are getting high underneath
the tanglewood bridge

our shoulders stick together
with sweat, one of us coughing,
inexperienced, the other
laughing

it is summer again, and
i don't remember a day when i
didn't want to spend
all my time with
you

every wall of this house reminds me
of you-

reminds me that you are 591 miles
away, and i haven't heard from you
for seventeen days, and i am beginning
to worry

before you left we sat on the
couch and i asked you to promise
me you would stay alive.
when i held out my pinkie you couldn't
take it, and i always tried to make sure
you'd never see me cry, but i couldn't
stand the thought of living
around your ghost and i guess i just
                                                   lost it

there is a cold spot on the sofa and
i wonder if it is you

tonight is the first night i truly sink my teeth
into an idea
     of letting it all go
and yeah sure i've been here before
yeah sure i've put another bullet through my skull
but what good is that to you
and what good am i to you
but still i can't think at all
can't think of anyone else

with bare hands you wring my flesh loose
with cold time i repeat nothing else
and subliming frustration
with two words you broke my ventricles down

with "all yours"
don't say anything
and i could dripfeed you sugar, honey
but what good is that
and what good am i
in the middle of some other night
capturing some other set of eyes
all i've got is gasoline for a smile

but don't wait up
  don't wait for anything better to come
'cause you ain't got me yet

but if you wait up
if you wait up
i can catch you
i can catch the wind

but i can forcefeed you frigidity if you want me to leave
and i can not matter if you want me to...