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 Jul 2013 madeline may
Meka Boyle
She took the train for the first time
To go spend a few weeks with her daddy
In the summer before she started second grade.
Her suitcase had pink light up wheels on it
And was full of her best summer dresses and pictures
She drew with his name scrawled on the back.
She cried at the station because she didn't want to go,
And slept the whole way there.

She took the train again, in high school
Accompanied by a group of friends
Going to the city for the weekend to see a baseball game.
She didn't bring any luggage,
But came back with arms full of plastic shopping bags.
She cried because her mother didn't understand
That 16 is too old for a curfew,
And smoked cigarettes the whole way there.

She took the train, once more,
Her freshman year of college.
She went to visit her best friend at school.
Her duffle bag was full of flimsy bikinis and Sartre.
She didn't cry this time, until on her way back
When she realized that something had been lost somewhere along the way,
And that she was too old now to ever know what it was.

She took the train, again, for the last time.
The summer before her second year of college;
She said she wasn't going anywhere in particular.
She bought a ticket for Sacramento, and left it in the car.
This time, her suitcase was full of heavy rocks,
And made her tilt a little to the left as she dragged it down the ramp.
She began to cry at the station, for the death of someone she used to know.
And, seconds before the train left,
She flung herself onto the rusted tracks,
Leaving behind nothing
Except a couple of ticket stubs and a poem titled "Somewhere".
 Jul 2013 madeline may
j
ten thousand ways to confess
how I feel
three little words I can't admit
to you
and these words have graced
the tip of my tongue
a countless amount of times
but the thought of them escaping
my debauched lips
sends shivers down my spine
and I don't think
that I'll ever understand
this whole great concept of love
but on some days I admit
I feel it so strong
like when the snowflakes fall upon your nose
and I kiss them off so lightly
and the way you smile
as the first cup of coffee
graces your elegant lips
and how your eyes light up
when you listen to those songs
                                  our songs
and it's how I feel when I'm with you
I love you
What do you do
When you love someone
But they aren't
What's best for you
this is all so confusing and I don't know what to do
Falling asleep
Would be a wonderful way
To die
To simply
Dream forever
To sail among the stars
With your lost lover
For an eternity
Nothing can be so bad
When you're
Dreaming
RIP grandpa. I hope you find your wife. I will miss both of you forever. I love you.
I did not drown in the sea as I had feared
I simply became one with the waves
I will not deny the initial pain
A result of my resistance to change
Months were spent gasping for air
The air my lungs no longer needed
It was you who swam beneath
You who taught me to surrender
I finally stopped fighting
And gulped the salty water
Now we swim side by side
Our heartbeats matching the rhythm of the tide
They said its all downhill from here
But I feel myself rising
Raising out of my own pretensions
Ascending towards meaninglessness
And reaching peaks of insanity
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