there is something pristine and sacred
about a lack of time, an instant, a moment
that makes the crude passage look shabby
in a particular second you look happier and fuller
and the cinematic reveal overshadows what it is
that lacks background music. and maybe
the reason why the world seems so lackluster
is because we fail to acknowledge that even the roughshod
worn-down edges of time's brutal, eroded field
are more beautiful and sacred than a moment
for time takes all and bends it and makes it wild-
the very thing that can take what is tame and untame it
(though the very act of change is control and
control seems to tame, it does not, it flows,)
it works its will but it works with
for it is nothing outside of matter and space
and a moment only looks, only glances at the majesty of existence
a moment is there and then it is gone, lost forever,
only to be watched from a distant lighthouse
vaguely trying to find the way home through the fog
but time is, has been, and will be the entirety
of all we know- it is endless, confusing, less perfect
than we thought it was- and that is more glorious
than anything we can possibly understand.

it is a strange practice, learning to understand someone
it begins with a rough sketch of 'the way they feel about
their parents' or 'what happened to their siblings'
and it progresses on with a Myers Briggs evaluation
sometimes taking their mental pulse in different subjects
marking what they care about and what they don't
enscribing the single sentence of their
self-worth, their desire, and their motivations
on whatever it is that binds the two of you together,
and growing with them and learning the way in which they grow
you know their crystal lattice and you know how it forms
a molecular structure in fractals, in fractals, in fractals
that builds and changes but is always quite the same,

I know what makes you laugh,
I know how to make you cry,
I have learned you and I know
which keyholes can be pressed, slid into, or clicked
I know of all your crevices and your breakages
and I know how to fix them or how to
drive a wedge so deep inside you that you splinter
I can map when your breath is short and I can chart
your secrets on the walls of my heart, kept there
like a case-file in a robbery- you have stolen
me, my very existence,
and there is an arrow and a pin and lines drawn
to every single bit of who you are
I have learned you, I have measured you,
you have been weighed and found wanting
and I know what it is you are wanting in the depths of your being
but the finding of these things is difficult and rocky and awkward
for you have taken what it is that is me and you have
patterned it over the immense and layered texture of you
breaking and filling holes, pouring into a mold
and I am invested, now, for I am made for you,
but there is no turning back and we must go on from here
I learn and change from the people around me
but first I must learn you.

It is a strange practice, learning to understand someone,
but once I understand you, then
now, now we can begin.

I have never been
so small
but maybe this is God reminding me
that I have always been
this small

I found that, in the midst of my panic,
I only saw one person who would be capable of reassuring me
only one person with whom I would trust
my knowledge and passing into the great beyond
only he would make sense of it and guide me into that journey
for I knew and I assumed
that he and only he
knew where I was going.

First thing, you are beautiful, You may not realize it,
Because I know I don't feel that way about myself
But so many people agree on how pretty you are
Second, I know you don't feel a reason for living
Well I can promise I don't have all the answers,no one does
But I know that God made a choice when He decided.
He decided you were amazing enough to bring into the world
Whether  you believe it or not, He loves you, and has a plan
Remember, at the end of a storm there is always a rainbow
Third, you are not trash. No one on this earth is
You are a human being made God's Image
And anything created in God's Image is never trash
Fourth, you are one of the most talented people I know
No one else can play any instrument like you can,
Fifth, you may not know the purpose of your life now,
But later maybe you'll figure it out, you can do anything
Because that's the thing with life, you always have a choice
And overall, everyone loves you. I'm serious.
And you may not realize it,
*When you smile, you can see everyone else smile too

What I've learned from my parents
My parents have taught many things,
And this has given me insight
So now I know what to do from the mistakes they've made:
Accept your kid, whatever ****** orientation they may be
Don't act like you know everything,
For all you know your child may be right
Once you make your point, shut up
Don't keep repeating the same thing
Let your kid express them selves,
If they like Bob Marley then let them own Bob Marley apparel
Don't pressure sports and grades to wear they get stress migraines
Don't scream at your child to where they cower in fear when your angry
Let your child know they can always come and talk to you
All of these things I've learned because my parents are the opposite, and have made mistakes that I now see
These mistakes can scar your child

God, help them
Help those in need,
Today I watched, yet again,
My friend give away her lunch
Does anyone else see it?
Another doesn't see the point in life
And is slipping into depression
Another cut herself,
(I know what that is like)
But all these beautiful people
Are hating themselves in ways,
And I know that just me alone,
Telling them they are beautiful
Is not enough to heal them,
Jesus, you healed thousands,
I'm begging You to rest your hand
Upon these people,
And let them know
*They are enough

Includes the following:
Getting my scuba license,
Leaving to swimming with sharks
In which I'll trade in my fins for wings
And hanglide through the mountains
Then I'll cut off my wings and fall
Skydiving in the India,
And while I'm in India I might as well
Go on a mission trip and help the poor,
Speaking of helping, I'll go to Africa
And help out at one of the reserves
And experience African wildlife
And if we are talking about wildlife
I'll live in Alaska for a year,
Maybe I'll get some shots of bears
Then maybe somewhere in between all of this I'll squeeze in college

the goal of the best writers
is to be able to live and respond to the literature
in a most coherent way
but the goal of the best literature
is to totally and completely overwhelm the writer
to blend their thoughts and feelings into an incoherent mess
to make an indelible mark on their souls
and to leave their pulse racing and their eyes throbbing
to wipe their life experience into a blank slate and rewrite it
in a hurricane of ideas and emotions, tumbling and burning their lives
like a holy firestorm, lost in the desert and whipping the scalding wind around
this, the tenderest and gentlest part of your heart.