I thought that turning 18 would make the small puzzles fall into place
That I would finally be somebody I've been longing to be
I would be confident in myself. -But that wasn't the case
I thought so much, that if I believed hard enough
That all my dreams would come true like small butterflies
baffling out of their cocoons filled with pure love
But again I thought so much I forgot to act on my beliefs
and on my behalf that hand hit me so hard in my face
the hand of reality
I now lie on the ground thinking to myself
"maybe I was too busy living in the world of it-will-happen,
than to be working on the I-will-make-it-happen, which I had left on a shelf"
Foolishly I keep lying down because how do I get up
even such a small thing as that is difficult since I never fought for me,
but I have to because the fighting against me project had to stop
Maybe I just need a little time to figure out how my legs work
and get used to acting and standing up
then maybe finally living life will become a perk