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Nov 2018 · 179
Love and Hate
Lovelust Nov 2018
You say you want me,
You say you need me,
You want me to have every part of you,
But you push me away,
There I stay,
Just as broken as your heart,
How Long will this last?
Jun 2018 · 116
a step back
Lovelust Jun 2018
I want to tell you,
That you are beautiful,
I want to just pick you up,
and kiss you,
I want to feel,
The beat of your heart,
But I hold myself back,
Because you would never love me.
May 2018 · 79
Untitled
Lovelust May 2018
I searched for myself,
Inside a bottle,
What came out,
Was something I couldn't face.

I drink to lose myself,
To find a way out from this pain,
But the pain keeps coming back,
And my souls not the same.

So pour me a double,
And watch me sink,
Because life isn't fun,
So hand me a drink.
May 2018 · 94
One more
Lovelust May 2018
I can't walk out the door,
It just feels too good to stay,
One more hit,
One more drink,
One more drag.

But if I step away again,
what'll that achieve,
It won't make me happy,
So I go round in circles,
no better than a dog.

So watch me fall,
And see if I can get up again.
Jul 2017 · 126
U
Lovelust Jul 2017
U
I Can't tell anymore,
If I am awake,
Or if I'm stuck in a dream,
I've got friends,
But I'm alone,
I'm enjoying myself,
But I'm sad,
When I get into things,
I'm go all in,
But some times,
It was never worth the risk,
I hate you,
I love you,
I'd be nothing without you,
But would I be,
If there are plenty of fish in the sea,
how significant is you and me,
There are different places we could be,
But girl you can't keep lying  to yourself,
Can't you see the effect it has on your health,
Waiting and see isn't an option for me,
I wish you could see,
But I've realized you are blind,
Just like me.
Jun 2017 · 237
\\\
Lovelust Jun 2017
\\\
It's funny,
How one moment,
Can change everything,
And have a lasting impact,
On your relationships with people,
It's stupid.
May 2017 · 343
Sunrise
Lovelust May 2017
I got faded,
So I could take a step back,
To realise what I'm doing,
To see how I truly feel.

In your darkest moments,
It's hard to see any light,
But when that sun rises,
Some pain seems to go away.

So whenever I'm down,
I'll look for my next sunrise to pick me up.
May 2017 · 239
Why?
Lovelust May 2017
How did I get here,
Why am I so lost,
I can't get back,
But I can't just leave,
And I'm just being pulled back in,
When I really should just leave.
May 2017 · 207
Day 1
Lovelust May 2017
1 Hour,
Freedom,
Where I could just be me,
No stress,
No restraints,
Just Nachos,
Fries,
And Garlic Bread.
May 2017 · 205
Death.
Lovelust May 2017
When I'm gone,
Will anyone be there,
Will anyone care,
Would they even feel close,
To how I'm feeling right now,
There is an unspoken beauty to death,
There is tranquility,
There is peace,
No more worrying,
No  more problems,
Just silence.
Apr 2017 · 168
Light.
Lovelust Apr 2017
Should I do it again,
Just for the thrill,
That buzz I got last time,
When everything felt so real,
And I felt so alive,
Maybe one last time.
Apr 2017 · 195
Start again
Lovelust Apr 2017
Starting again,
It feels good,
There's something beautiful and exciting,
And if things go wrong I could always,
Start again.
Feb 2017 · 236
-----
Lovelust Feb 2017
I'm screaming on the inside,
I'm bleeding out from my eyes,
My breath has become heavy,
Gasping for more air,
Did you even care,
Because I've been played,
And you've reached the finish line,
Leaving me weak and alone,
The one person a cared about gone,
You didn't even want to try,
So if you ever read this,
You will know how you made me feel.
Feb 2017 · 140
.
Lovelust Feb 2017
.
A lot can happen in a year,
As this time goes on,
You slowly start to change,
As every encounter,
Gives you a new perspective,
On how you perceive,
The world around you.
Jan 2017 · 150
C
Lovelust Jan 2017
C
You once asked me,
To describe you in one word,
But I just couldn't,
Because you are more than just a word to me,
When I am with you time isn't an object,
It's an enemy,
But there is no one better to face it with,
Than you.
Dec 2016 · 455
Answer Please
Lovelust Dec 2016
What are we?
You just fill my head,
With endless questions,
But always fail to mention,
What we are,
What we are doing.

You're not over it,
Over him,
So where does that put me?
I'm like the toy,
That you just build,
And slowly start to breakdown.

What should I do?
Should I just leave,
But then who would you have?
Who would I have?  

Will I ever be free of this torment,
It's like i'm stuck in this cage,
Waiting for you to set me free,
But you don't,
And I'm stuck,
Waiting,
Waiting,
Time has become my enemy,
Ticking down the days,
I don't want to do this anymore,
I just want it all to end,
I can't take it,
Maybe I should,
Who would actually care.
Dec 2016 · 197
My Heart
Lovelust Dec 2016
It was labeled fragile,
And it was left broken,
But over time,
People have been picking up the pieces,
And putting it back together,
Just so you could feel it beating,
So now i've rested it in your hands,
And hope you take better care of it.
Dec 2016 · 485
Untitled
Lovelust Dec 2016
I'm most creative at my darkest,
The pain is what keeps me going,
Without it I would have no will no drive,
The smoke although slowly choking me,
Is elevating the stress,
Alcohol is numbing the pain,
Is this how i'm supposed to be?
Is this how i'm Supposed to live?
Live.
The word it has become funny,
As if it's my own personal joke,
As I don't feel alive.
Nov 2016 · 179
Air
Lovelust Nov 2016
Air
I can't find it,
I can't feel it,
When your down,
I fell your pain,
You are what I bleed,
I was too busy looking for you,
In someone else,
When you where there all along.
Nov 2016 · 445
Raw
Lovelust Nov 2016
Raw
I've never felt this way before,
When I'm with you,
I can actually feel my heart,
You make me feel alive,
Something that is actually real,
People notice somethings going on,
Are we to scared to say how we feel?
Nov 2016 · 197
Substance
Lovelust Nov 2016
Everything's the same,
There is no variation anymore,
Sleep,
Work,
Eat,
It's as if there is no substance,
That I have become what I hate,
Boring,
Alone,
Is there any point sometimes,
And when there is something,
Some form of petty connection,
I end up hurting them,
I get myself stuck in these awkward situations,
I just,
I just can't cope anymore,
Then I go into my own loop,
Of things I shouldn't do,
And an overwhelming arrogance,
Why do I bother?
Why am I here?
Nov 2016 · 165
Untitled
Lovelust Nov 2016
You said you wanted to know me,
But can you handle the scars that lie underneath,
I don't like to say how I feel,
As it makes me vulnerable,
So I close myself up,
Like a safe,
With my feelings hidden from the world.

I feel trapped in this state,
Of complete obsession and infatuation,
As when I feel it is overwhelming,
I feel like shutting it all down.
Oct 2016 · 252
Lucifer
Lovelust Oct 2016
He brought the light to the night sky,
But like so many others,
Flaws turn into mistakes,
He fell from grace,
Took on his decent,
With that a door closed,
and another opened,
But now his name,
Isn't remembered for the gifts in the sky,
Instead it's a name of sin.
Oct 2016 · 228
words
Lovelust Oct 2016
I can feel it happening,
The pain again,
It builds up,
To be let down,
It's as if it could never work,
But my words blur the message,
I can never be clear.
Oct 2016 · 162
Untitled
Lovelust Oct 2016
I feel rage,
Like an internal fire,
Burning inside of me,
I believe in fate,
But why have you,
Put so many obstacles in my path,
Have you condemned me to eternal lust,
Wanting things I will never get,
What are you trying to tell me,
Why can't you tell me,
Why can't you help,
Is like one day the switch is on,
Then the next is closed,
I'm fed up with it.
Oct 2016 · 240
Autumn Silence
Lovelust Oct 2016
First It was nothing,
But no friends could be so close,
She touches me,
In a way like no other,
But only as a friend,
That's what I thought anyway.

A while back,
She asks me,
Do you find me attractive?
I reply,
But before I answer,
She already knew what I was going to say,
As if she could tell in my eyes,
Then it was back to the same old,
touching and flirtatious gestures,
fir the rest of the night.

Then whilst sober,
She doesn't know how to think about me,
Then silence,
Silence,
S I L E N C E,
Nothing no word no peep.

We meet again,
She has a sadness in her eyes,
And I'm the void to fill her pain,
To make her laugh,
She asks the same question,
Do you find me attractive?
She grabs my arm then we stare into each others eyes,
We feel it but we have to resist,
But dogs will always chase cats,
And thats the way it is.
Oct 2016 · 131
door
Lovelust Oct 2016
To you I say hello,
A new window,
To what was a closed door,
It's funny how the world works,
Things seem to point you into new directions,
As if it was a part of some grand plan.
Oct 2016 · 191
A part of me
Lovelust Oct 2016
Let me tell you something,
I'm scared,
Of myself,
My urges.

Someday I'm afraid,
I might take it to far,
Or lash out to hard.

I suppress who I am,
Because I'm scared,
No one likes me,
That no one cares.

I feel alone,
Most nights,
Most days.

I follow the crowd,
To hide myself,
I'm not an individual.

I wanted you to save me,
But you couldn't,
I fear I'm losing myself.

When I gave you,
a part of myself,
It was to show you,
How I feel.

But now there is this distance,
I hate it,
We used to be close,
But people change,
And so do feelings.
Oct 2016 · 483
Blanks
Lovelust Oct 2016
Everywhere I go,
I see blank faces,
As they slowly,
Lose themselves,
Piece by piece,
Until there is nothing left,

Blank people,
Losing,
What made them unique,
What made them real,
Are we just going to be,
A generation of blanks?
With no individuality,
With no soul!
Oct 2016 · 178
Untitled
Lovelust Oct 2016
Something has changed,
We don't talk like we used to,
Hell do we even talk anymore,
It's like I'm the one who's done something wrong,
I was used,
So you could move on,
Someone low enough,
So you can feel good,
Well I cared,
Now I'm here,
Left to pick up the pieces.
Oct 2016 · 123
Hooked
Lovelust Oct 2016
I can't keep away,
I'm hooked,
Why can't I forget,
I don't want to say no,
But I can't let it go.
Oct 2016 · 305
/thoughts/
Lovelust Oct 2016
Am I distant,
I am in the room,
But I don't feel there,
I am speaking,
But the real words don't come out,
Do people recognize me,
If I die today,
Would anyone realize,
I'm trapped in my head,
Screaming to tell people how I feel,
I need help,
Help,
HELP!
Oct 2016 · 302
Ugh
Lovelust Oct 2016
Ugh
What do you think I'm going to do,
How do you think i'm going to feel,
I feel like I can't live without you,
I think about you most days,
And care one others shouldn't
But I think we need space,
To think and revaluate,
Before the friendship gets torn in two.
Oct 2016 · 134
you
Lovelust Oct 2016
you
How can I feel,
When I'm already broken,
How can I breath,
When there is no air,
How do I drink,
When there is no water,
How do I live,
Without you?
Oct 2016 · 725
Deseo
Lovelust Oct 2016
Deseo,
Puedo sentirte,
Más allá de las palabras,
No me importa lo que la gente piensa,
Todo lo que importa,
Es que me paso el tiempo con usted,
Como te veo en una luz que ningún otro puede.
Sep 2016 · 311
Drug
Lovelust Sep 2016
I used to think you were my drug,
Hit it then quit it,
But I got addicted,
Now all I want is that *****,
The pure ecstasy I crave,
As I go deeper it only gets stronger,
I'm hooked,
And I don't want to come down,
I just want to feel as high as I do,
When i'm with you,
But supply and demand,
Isn't the same as it used to be,
When all I wan't is that hit.
Sep 2016 · 140
-
Lovelust Sep 2016
-
I wanted it to be a reality,
But I was kidding myself,
It could never happen,
It will never change,
I am alone,
Once more,
Its not the idea,
It's the risk,
Whats more important,
Me being there,
Or not at all,
I guess it's out of my hands,
So i'll put myself back in the box,
And throw away the key.
Sep 2016 · 152
I want to know
Lovelust Sep 2016
I can feel you,
But I can't touch you,
It's as if you are on another level,
Whilst i'm stuck on square one,
Wondering what could happen,
What will happen,
We can't be open because that's who we are,
We care to much,
Does the risk outweigh the loss,
Because I'm going all in,
And all your doing is folding.
Sep 2016 · 132
Untitled
Lovelust Sep 2016
I don't know where I'm at with you,
I don't know where I want to be with you,
I can tell how you feel around me,
What you think,
With you i'm lost
Sep 2016 · 138
Untitled
Lovelust Sep 2016
Have you ever noticed me,
The face behind the mask,
The side no one gets to see,
Are my feelings real,
Do I feel anything anymore,
Can you even see me,
My life is floating,
Whilst i'm falling.
Sep 2016 · 153
Conflict
Lovelust Sep 2016
I'm conflicted,
I want it to be a reality,
I want to see how it turns out,
As this could be something good,
But I wouldn't know what we would do,
If we lost each other,
so tell me what to do.
Sep 2016 · 434
1 D0N7 F331 PR3S3N7
Lovelust Sep 2016
I'm alive,
Yet I am not there,
My mind wandering,
People talking,
But it's just background noise,
I wonder does this make them feel alive,
Are they truly there,
Is anything real,
Am I real?
Aug 2016 · 164
Night
Lovelust Aug 2016
I find myself alone,
Staring at the sky,
Watching the moon rise,
When it's dark I feel safe,
Comforted by the cold,
I like the silence,
But sometimes it's deafening,
When all you can hear,
Is the voice in your head.
Jul 2016 · 234
Cold
Lovelust Jul 2016
I feel cold,
Cold to touch,
Cold inside,
My senses are becoming numb,
My world is turning darker and darker,
Until I am one with the void.
Jun 2016 · 174
Glass
Lovelust Jun 2016
I needed space,
So I could find myself,
Support myself for once,
Instead of holding other people,
One could say im selfish,
But I need to fix myself,
Before I can help anyone else.

Everyone is made of glass,
Some are durable than others,
But we are all fragile.
Jun 2016 · 333
Untitled
Lovelust Jun 2016
I don't know what i'm doing
Jun 2016 · 256
Snake
Lovelust Jun 2016
You can judge me about my choice,
But when you go to do it yourself,
It's all fine?

Why do you have to ***** about me,
When all I've ever done is helped you,
Is this what you call fair?

I don't have time for people who are fake,
Lying to my face every chance they get,
As life is to short.
Jun 2016 · 171
Life
Lovelust Jun 2016
Isn't it funny,
How life goes,
In the blink of an eye,
Is it really worth trying so hard,
And not enjoying life for what it is,
I envy the animals they are so free,
They can live,
They don't have the struggles of finding a job,
They don't have to go through an education system thats clearly flawed,
They don't have the problems that we have put on ourselves,
I wish to be free.
Jun 2016 · 153
Lust
Lovelust Jun 2016
I am lost,
Not of place,
But of heart,
Placed upon a soul,
Who does not feel the same,
Some would call it bad luck,
For the hand I've been dealt,
All I can do is move on,
And stop my heart from ache.
May 2016 · 261
Falling
Lovelust May 2016
The more time I spend,
The more I talk,
The fear that the spark will fade,
That we will grow apart,
And you won't like me,
As I like you.
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