I'm trembleing
My hands are cold
Nervous
Cos the test is too close

Too close
And my mind not free
Full of words
Right words, wrong situation
Wrong words, true situation

Why am I thinking of you
The most normal person
Invisible in the crowd of humans
But incredible in the  overabundance
Of humanity

And I keep wondering
If you feel
What I feel
Panic before catastrophe
You, before panic

I should be quiet
I should sleep
But impossible
Feelings too deep

Seems like the thoughts
Are screaming in my head
How could I sleep
Cold air is crushing the heat

And I feel standing still
Liquid blood turns into ice
Burning volcanoes explode
Frozen river in my mind

Souls on fire

There's a melody in my head
A song
I don't know the words
They were running out
But I know the feelings
I want to let them out
Out

But when
But how
But who would recognize them
Outside my heart
So I keep dreaming of you

I'm destroyed
I'm full-filled
Complete
And shattered

Is it your fault or mine



Or love's

Little lovers' hope

Unfearful
But full-filled with fear
Oh dear
Waiting for a sign

it hurts
and I cannot describe it
no scars to see
but too many scars inside
my words
and all my thoughts
do not make sense

I want it to stop
but cannot imagine to live without

and everything reminds me of you
not just your smile
not just your stories
not your body
not just your voice
not your hands

I mean, You
Just You
Nothing and no one else

the poet?
don't ask me who he is
the poet?
disappears
and leaving words
the only legacy

everything was unexpected
the smile
the look in your eyes
the perfection
with all its mistakes
and the beauty
without being beautiful
and a laughter
and the jokes
and the hands
and the melody of your voice
and the distance
as well as being near
and the destruction
and the hope within
crashed me unexpected

Wishing Dreams
No Wishes
No Dreams
But Something In Between
But Something More

Same As Love
And The Conflict between Distance
And Being Near

It Hurts
It Destroys

Can Someone Heal This Pain
But I Dont Want This Pain To Be Healed
This Sweet Pain Of Fears And Break Downs
Pushing Me Through The Deepnees Of The Dark
This Sweet Pain Of Hope
That Makes Me Fly

Because It Cannot Be Healed
But It Can Be Lived

Thoughts Cannot Be Turned Off

Thoughts
crashing my mind
filling  the emptiness
with emotions combined

Thoughts
stupid words
wandering around
burning down

heal, destroy
and be

Wind
show her the right way
show her the true way
Wind
help her to fly away
help her to find her way


'cause
they try to shape her
they try to change her
they try to break her in two

they're not really hating her
not letting escaping her
but
hiding the truth


Wind
show me the right way
show me the true way

Abandoned memories
nothing and more
everytime I remember
I'm torn
I can't even write this song
'cause it hurts
like I'm on fire

Say it
Say a word and I believe it
It was never in my mind
To say forever goodbye
And please take this
Take my heart and leave with
Leave with one last memory of our hearts
That nobody can break this piece of us
That we never get lost

Feels like a lone drop
falling in the sea
coming from the dark cloud
chasing after me
but the sun still burns

wanna catch these feelings
just to put them in a cage
won't let them out until I
recover my trace
an then I trample on them
trample them down
to the ground

And this drop becomes a rain
so heavy like the pain
in my chest

And this tone will be so low
So cold like the winds will blow
and never rest

I hope someday
they'd fade away

nothing made me float
was too deep on the ground
but ready to fall
with no sound, with no sound
but then there were blue crystals
blazing, healing my soul
I start flying, I start getting tall
Til they turn grey
no answer
billion questions
but the blue crystals aren't lost

His name was Nik
thats how I called him
desperate, I was
unknown, he was
years ago something in me realized
desperate, he was
unknown, I was

Torn between the feelings
that can't be described
it's a wave of colors
from black to white

which are no colors

I wish to look in your eyes
not seeing them cold
not seeing them blind
but they seem miles
away

A little to far
A little to near
chaos in my head
love and fear


Trying to find an answer to the not answered questions